Lets make Friday 'Joke Day'!

Conference, big auditorium, lecture on infidelity.
Lecturer: "If we look at cheating rate by profession, we will see the following statistics. Most cheating are artists, next are bankers, followed by the pilots."

Someone from the back row: "That can't be true. I am a pilot and in my 30 years of flying i have never cheated on my wife."

Someone else from front rows: "Because of idiots like you, we're in the 3rd place"
 
My favorite billboards are the ones that tell you to avoid distracted driving. They put an image in my head of someone from the traffic safety division asking the ad company if they can make the sign flash bright colors.
 
Fun fact: Koi fish always travel in groups of 4.


If attacked koi A, B and C will scatter leaving behind the D koi.
 
robin ardoin said:
The other day I counted 4/5 advertising PI lawyers at one main intersection. On I-10 in Louisiana, the PI firms lease probably 80% of the space. Out of control, for certain.
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Lawyers: The only occupation where the more of them there are, the more work all of them have.
 
Lots of DUIs in Louisiana. The very first time I visited my good buddy and business partner in NOLA, I was shocked to see drive-thru daiquiri stands, much like drive-thru fast food.

www.bonappetit.com

An Oral History of Louisiana’s Drive-thru Daiquiri Stands

Once upon a time, a college student named David Ervin had a wacky idea that one day became a beloved institution.
www.bonappetit.com www.bonappetit.com

We were building a real estate empire until Katrina and Rita wiped us out and killed my buddy--RIP Keith Keller.
 
Domenick said:
Lots of DUIs in Louisiana. The very first time I visited my good buddy and business partner in NOLA, I was shocked to see drive-thru daiquiri stands, much like drive-thru fast food.

www.bonappetit.com

An Oral History of Louisiana’s Drive-thru Daiquiri Stands

Once upon a time, a college student named David Ervin had a wacky idea that one day became a beloved institution.
www.bonappetit.com www.bonappetit.com

We were building a real estate empire until Katrina and Rita wiped us out and killed my buddy--RIP Keith Keller.
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We had 3 drive through liquor stores in my home town. One served you if you had a driver's license...the driving age was 15yo at the time (nuts!). If you had a van full of teenagers, you could order two mixed drinks, if you showed your license, and once 50ft down the drive, pass the second off to an 'underage' person in the vehicle. One of the stores is still in existence but no longer has a drive through. Crazy times back in the 70's.
 
Bob: "My grandson is in the high school sporting clays state championship."
Tom: "He must be very good at math."
Bob: "Math?"
Tom: "Yes - Trigernometry"
 
JScarry said:
In the same vein, does is it made from magical penises or does it make yours magical?
Inquiring minds want to know.

View attachment 153095
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It's probably not "Chinglish":eek:

Erectile dysfunction treatment and traditional medicine—can East and West medicine coexist? - PMC

Erectile dysfunction (ED) is a common sexual problem affecting many men irrespective of cultures, beliefs and nationalities. While medical therapy for ED has been revolutionized by the advent of oral phosphodiesterase type 5 inhibitors and ...
pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
In Eastern medicine, animal products are commonly used for their perceived health benefits. The philosophy “like nourishes like”, suggests that consuming the organ of an animal will bring benefits to the corresponding organ in one’s body is a common belief. Men seeking greater potency have turned to eating penises from goats, bull, deer, horses, seals and other mammals in the form of cooked dishes or herbal preparations. While there is no scientific evidence supporting this practice, the cultural beliefs remain strong and supplements containing extracts from animal penises are readily available in the form of capsules, often mixed with herbal compounds pitching similar erectogenic properties. A significant proportion of these potency-inducing supplements in Asia have been found to contain PDE5-inhibitors substrates such as tadalafil and sildenafil (30). However uncontrolled use of illicit PDE5-inhibitors under the guise of natural supplements remains a health threat to the general public.
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Oh for a return to the simpler days when Coke actually contained coke. And no, I'm not quite that old, but it would have made picking up a cold one from the local store, walking home from grade school, more interesting, probably.
 
Albany Tom said:
Oh for a return to the simpler days when Coke actually contained coke. And no, I'm not quite that old, but it would have made picking up a cold one from the local store, walking home from grade school, more interesting, probably.
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Well, I've heard there are after-market additives available.......
 
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