[rant]Level five abort, stand down[/rant]

Sac Arrow

Sac Arrow

Touchdown! Greaser!
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Snorting his way across the USA
This is a hot dog thread. You ask, why is it a hot dog thread and why is there so much drama? Well, you see, I was on my own for dinner (dangerous) and in charge of four hot dogs that were allocated to me for dinner, plus some kind of Asian salad. Now... the hot dogs in themselves were not dangerous. But, I like the Costco ones that are big and plump and they put them on those micro roller thingies that cook them perfectly. Well, I had to...
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Improvise. That is not a Costco dog but you can buy them from Costco to take home and do with them what you will. That is however some all beef frank (Frank?) and this is the method I chose to cook it. And four of its brothers. Cheap man's BBQ. Basically a propane (okay natural gas) burner, a skewer and a hot dog. Look, we've all done it. Most of us.

Here's the thing... The first one, the second one, and even the third, have had some heat transfer abnormalities. The portion of the hot dog closest to my hand was consistently NOT getting the full treatment. So, on the fourth I decided to spend a little more time on the inner end.

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Dude! The skewer burned and the hot dog fell in to the flames! Code level five alpha sigma top secret pantographic nine one one get the hell out of here situation occurred.

Man, my weiner hasn't burned so bad since Thailand '99. Bad experience man. Bad trip bro. Bad acid, Leary.

Yeah I tried putting it in water. The bamboo skewer, not my penis. Well my penis was in water earlier but never mind that. My god, I was th
 
I'm trying to decide which is worse, your charred on the outside charcoal burgers or the direct fired hydrocarbon flamed weiners. o_O
Not even ketchup can fix this one.
 
GRG55 said:
I'm trying to decide which is worse, your charred on the outside charcoal burgers or the direct fired hydrocarbon flamed weiners. o_O
Not even ketchup can fix this one.
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You didn't like my burgers?
 
Sac Arrow said:
You didn't like my burgers?
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Well I will admit that an actual taste performance test might have swayed me completely the other way. Methinks next year at Kentucky Dam there should be a burger contest where we can compare first hand all the various means of preparing them, and put that controversy to rest once and for all. :cool:
 
Dude! Not sure where to begin with this error chain!

First - Asian salad and hot dog? Potato salad maybe. Or coleslaw... but Asian salad? Should have pounded your meat (chicken) and made Satay of some sort.

As for hot dogs... boil them! Then if you want that hot dog roller taste, just take out a pan and pan fry the skin a bit. (Or you can start with a pan fry, but you need to know how to handle your meat, Man!)

PS. Pretty sure Costco boils or puts the dogs in a steam bath...
 
GRG55 said:
Well I will admit that an actual taste performance test might have swayed me completely the other way. Methinks next year at Kentucky Dam there should be a burger contest where we can compare first hand all the various means of preparing them, and put that controversy to rest once and for all. :cool:
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“put that controversy to rest once and for all”? This is POA man! There is no “to rest” and certainly no “once and for all”. Though the gathering of burgers is a solid idea. :)
 
I think hot dogs are best when they are made with red chemicals and boiled in water way too long. Reminds me of going to fair when I was young. But boiling takes time, so a microwave is the next best. A grill comes a very distant third and the roller "death dogs" are just wrong.

See, we aren't even going to agree on hot dogs, don't go bringing hamburgers into it.
 
I put them under the broiler. I have since I was in high school. I used to make them for breakfast that way. I was never a big fan of boiled dogs.
 
bflynn said:
I think hot dogs are best when they are made with red chemicals and boiled in water way too long. Reminds me of going to fair when I was young.
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No, the best fair hotdogs are the foot-long ones that are skewered on a stick, rolled in cornmeal, deep fried, then smeared with mustard. Several varieties of beer make a good accompaniment, but root beer works quite well, too.
 
rtk11 said:
Dude! Not sure where to begin with this error chain!

First - Asian salad and hot dog? Potato salad maybe. Or coleslaw... but Asian salad? Should have pounded your meat (chicken) and made Satay of some sort.

As for hot dogs... boil them! Then if you want that hot dog roller taste, just take out a pan and pan fry the skin a bit. (Or you can start with a pan fry, but you need to know how to handle your meat, Man!)

PS. Pretty sure Costco boils or puts the dogs in a steam bath...
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I didn't make the Asian salad and the hot dogs were not my idea. I was left four plain ones for me to eat while the rest were cut and wrapped with that freezer dough stuff.

flhrci said:
You should have just used the microwave. :D
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Just... no.

steingar said:
I still say you shouldn't eat so much junk food.
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I would not have hot dogs on my own accord.
 
I consume hot dogs about two or three times a year, max. Those times are exclusively at baseball games. Otherwise, I do not desire hot dogs regardless of how they are cooked. Brats, sure. Hot dogs? Meh.
 
Slice them in half (hinge them open) and pan fry them. I get the Hebrew National low fat dogs and probably eat them once or twice a month, when I am in a hurry and need a quick meal.
 
steingar said:
I still say you shouldn't eat so much junk food.
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From what I can tell, he actually eats quite clean. The now and then cheat meal never hurt anybody, although it is a little odd to see somebody post a picture of their weiner.
 
Ryanb said:
From what I can tell, he actually eats quite clean. The now and then cheat meal never hurt anybody, although it is a little odd to see someone post a picture of their weiner.
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Unless you’re a congressman.
 
Ryanb said:
From what I can tell, he actually eats quite clean. The now and then cheat meal never hurt anybody, although it is a little odd to see somebody post a picture of their weiner.
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At least he shaved it and wasn't a hairy dog. :eek:
 
You did not have a metal hangar(sic) in the closet that you could have used?
 
I had a hot dog incident over the weekend too. I put mayo and parmesan cheese on a hot dog during Cinco de Mayo, and you'd think it was the end of the world.
 
JonH said:
I had a hot dog incident over the weekend too. I put mayo and parmesan cheese on a hot dog during Cinco de Mayo, and you'd think it was the end of the world.
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That would explain the clap of thunder I heard then! :eek:
 
Sac Arrow said:
That is not a Costco dog but you can buy them from Costco to take home and do with them what you will. That is however some all beef frank (Frank?)
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All beef..... yeah, all beef lips and all beef nipples....
vomit.gif
 
As a rant this is simply a picture of a glowing wiener tip. I suspect the ranter was unconscious when posting. How is that possible you might ask? Think of it politely as sleep posting. Nothing more requires comment.
 
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