Out of town funeral

Old97

Old97

Pre-takeoff checklist
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Old97
Way way off any aviation topic.

The end is near for one of my wife’s uncles. She wants us to go to the funeral several states away and bring the 7 month old kid. No one for him to stay with when we go.

Is there baby etiquette for a funeral? He is really good and usually quiet and happy.

What do you dress your baby in to attend a funeral?
 
Not really any etiquette problems I'm aware of - at least at the funerals I've attended. Funerals are for family, and you guys are family. As long as your son can stay quiet long enough, or you are ready to take him out if he starts fussing, there shouldn't be a problem.
 
Not a funeral, but at our wedding, we had some church kids baby sit all the little ones during the service. We knew that several family members would not be able to come if the little ones were not welcomed. Maybe there are enough coming that something like this could be arranged?
 
Etiquette and reverence shouldn’t be any different than at a church service. If they can remain quiet during the service than keep them in there, if they get fussy than take them out.

I also don’t think there’s any specific attire for a 7 month old at a funeral.

My condolences to you and the family. :(
 
Non-issue... don't over-think it. All families have babies and all families know babies aren't in control of their noises. Just the parents... who can pop outside with the baby at any time.

It isn't a trip to the symphony. :)
 
Take the kid. Hopefully he'll start wailing early on and give at least one of you an excuse to bounce. I mean, seriously, who wants to be at a funeral? Any excuse to leave is a good one, as far as I'm concerned. What better, more universally-accepted excuse is there than a crying baby? The kid's your ticket out of a boring, depressing, pointless ceremony.

I don't plan to have a funeral. That's my parting gift to my friends and family: No need to disrupt their lives to stare at a coffin while they silently subtract their own ages from my own, looking for a ballpark idea of how long they have left.

I did acquire a used grave recently, but I'm not sure I'm going to use it. I'd rather be dropped out of a biplane as it inverts over the Atlantic, and I do have a friend with a biplane who's willing to do it. But he's older than I am and in less-than-perfect health, and I'm not sure whether I can find another lunatic with a biplane who'll do the honors should my friend not be able to do so; so if the logistics of that plan don't work out, I have the grave as a backup plan.

My condolences on your loss.

Rich
 
I'm with Rich. As a matter of fact we struck a deal a long time ago. I won't go to his and he won't go to mine.
 
RJM62 said:
I don't plan to have a funeral. That's my parting gift to my friends and family: No need to disrupt their lives to stare at a coffin while they silently subtract their own ages from my own, looking for a ballpark idea of how long they have left.
Click to expand...

Dad demanded no funeral and to throw an open-bar party instead, and left the money to do it. Numerous people came up to us throughout the evening and said they were cancelling their plans for a traditional funeral after coming to the party. Big brewpub with a large rentable party room, put out photos and things he enjoyed on a video, played his favorite music, and let people mingle... open mic for a bit later on for anyone who wanted to say anything about him, and done...

Oh, and he specifically asked for a sign to be made up which we did have made and hung...

"Remember, you'll only get half of the story here today." :)
 
With two of you just trade off as needed. No need to hang around the casket for any length of time. If it’s her Uncle you could be more in the support role. If the baby gets fussy or needs a nap, leave her at the event while you exit.

Babies can be an upper at a funeral, showing the way towards the next generation. I wouldn’t bat an eye taking the baby.
 
sourdough44 said:
Babies can be an upper at a funeral, showing the way towards the next generation. I wouldn’t bat an eye taking the baby.
Click to expand...

Or... “Good lord I hope this kid doesn’t end up acting like the dead guy...!” LOL. :) :) :)
 
Remember the old saying. Go to funerals, because if you don't go to theirs, they might not go to yours....

Take the child, dress him up in the uncles favorite color.

Wow.... black diapers are a for real....
 
Funeral homes deal with this everyday. They will have a way to accomodate families with babies at the service.
 
Old97 said:
Way way off any aviation topic.

The end is near for one of my wife’s uncles. She wants us to go to the funeral several states away and bring the 7 month old kid. No one for him to stay with when we go.

Is there baby etiquette for a funeral? He is really good and usually quiet and happy.

What do you dress your baby in to attend a funeral?
Click to expand...

Funerals are mostly about life, not death. What better than a baby to celebrate the cycle?
 
denverpilot said:
Dad demanded no funeral and to throw an open-bar party instead, and left the money to do it. Numerous people came up to us throughout the evening and said they were cancelling their plans for a traditional funeral after coming to the party. Big brewpub with a large rentable party room, put out photos and things he enjoyed on a video, played his favorite music, and let people mingle... open mic for a bit later on for anyone who wanted to say anything about him, and done...

Oh, and he specifically asked for a sign to be made up which we did have made and hung...

"Remember, you'll only get half of the story here today." :)
Click to expand...

Oh, yeah. That’s style right there. I like it.
 
Just like any other church service or mass. Take the kid, if he gets fussy or cries then take him outside. Nobody will care.
 
Old97 said:
Way way off any aviation topic.

The end is near for one of my wife’s uncles. She wants us to go to the funeral several states away and bring the 7 month old kid. No one for him to stay with when we go.

Is there baby etiquette for a funeral? He is really good and usually quiet and happy.

What do you dress your baby in to attend a funeral?
Click to expand...

If anyone gets upset and says something, that person has identified themselves as the biggest jerk in the room. Like others have said, it's for family and the kid is family.




RJM62 said:
I don't plan to have a funeral. That's my parting gift to my friends and family: No need to disrupt their lives to stare at a coffin while they silently subtract their own ages from my own, looking for a ballpark idea of how long they have left.
Click to expand...

I always felt like the traditional funeral was one of the worst things you could do to someone who just lost someone they love. You just lost someone close to you then you've got to make all these decisions, many of them expensive, about how to put together this sad get together. Then after your initial grieving you're forced to sit around in a room with the body and meet and greet with a whole bunch of people who all politely will say "sorry for your loss" because there's little else to be said.

I hear some people get closure out of those things but I always felt like it was adding insult to injury so to speak.
 
I never like an open casket and if there is, I won't file by with everyone else. I like to remember them as they lived.
 
Thanks all - i dont expect any complaints - just want to be a “good citizen” at the funeral.
 
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