Corrupt my wish

Granted, but if it were cold you would face crazy cold weather resulting in loss of power.

I wish I was a millionaire already.
 
Granted. You cheated and won Monopoly against a five year old girl. Now you have all the monopoly money, and she is crying. Way to go man...

I wish I had a heated jacket (electric).
Edit: Welcome to POA!!!
 
ebykowsky said:
Granted. You cheated and won Monopoly against a five year old girl. Now you have all the monopoly money, and she is crying. Way to go man...

I wish I had a heated jacket (electric).
Edit: Welcome to POA!!!
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Granted, but it has really long arms and they are tied behind your back. Hans and Franz are in control.

"Franz vatch this asss I turn up this lever." Ebykowsky flesh singes.

"Hahahaha you very funny Hans. Let us test this jacket's resistance to outside heat sources!"

"Sounds very good Franz!"

You are dumped in to a pot of molten steel. You instantly vaporize but for whatever reason, the jacket appears to be mostly intact.

"Diss jacket have very good resistance to heat wouldn't you say."

"Ya."

I wish I hadn't pigged out on fast food last night. I feel like crap this morning.
 
Granted; you went around to the back of the Hardees (or Carl's Jr.) and got yourself some "stuff" from back there instead. You still feel like crap in the morning, because you spent all night in the fetal position in your bathtub fighting dragons. On the bright side, you didn't spend all morning in the fecal position!

I wish I could concentrate.
 
ebykowsky said:
Granted; you went around to the back of the Hardees (or Carl's Jr.) and got yourself some "stuff" from back there instead. You still feel like crap in the morning, because you spent all night in the fetal position in your bathtub fighting dragons. On the bright side, you didn't spend all morning in the fecal position!

I wish I could concentrate.
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Granted, but the process involves Hans and Franz, a meat grinder, a blender, and then a centrifuge.

I wish my Monday wasn't so busy. I barely have time to corrupt wishes.
 
Granted, but it is strange that you are having a busy Monday on Sunday night. The answer is that Scotty has beamed you to the Gobi Desert which explains the time change. You now have plenty of time to corrupt wishes, but unfortunately, no Internet connection.

I wish I had gotten more stuff done today around the house.
 
John221us said:
Granted, but it is strange that you are having a busy Monday on Sunday night. The answer is that Scotty has beamed you to the Gobi Desert which explains the time change. You now have plenty of time to corrupt wishes, but unfortunately, no Internet connection.

I wish I had gotten more stuff done today around the house.
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Granted, you got more stuff done today around the house relative to tomorrow, which is the start of your work week.

I wish I weren't in the same time zone as the Gobi Desert.
 
Granted, you are in Kabul, a bit earlier.

I wish my Fiat wasn't STILL in the shop. They are saying next week, so maybe there is an end in sight.
 
John221us said:
Granted, you are in Kabul, a bit earlier.

I wish my Fiat wasn't STILL in the shop. They are saying next week, so maybe there is an end in sight.
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Granted. They moved it here. At least you can drop in and give AggieMike a visit!

I wish they left the A/C on in my room during the winter.
 
ebykowsky said:
Granted. They moved it here. At least you can drop in and give AggieMike a visit!

I wish they left the A/C on in my room during the winter.
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Granted, but the running aircraft is filling your room with horrible, foul fumes and carbon monoxide.

I wish I didn't have to spend six hours a day on the road this week.
 
Granted, but 10 hours a day doesn't really feel any better.

I wish I had a good book.
 
John221us said:
Granted, but 10 hours a day doesn't really feel any better.

I wish I had a good book.
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Granted, your King James version of the bible is in your hands. Unfortunately, you elected to filch it from the Motel 6. Deeprac Sandhu is chasing you in his 1995 Tercel with some big assed knife in the passenger seat wanting it back. He isn't exactly sure why he wants a Christian bible in every room but one of his professors back in Motel school in New Delhi told him you needed to do that in the United States so he's prepared to fight to the death to get it back.

You swoosh, swerve, duck, and ahhh... a getaway spot.

Bad move. 7-Eleven. His #7 brother in law owns it. After making a small capital investment in duct tape, you find yourself bound and forced under a Slurpee machine. You ask for cherry. They give you grape. Your lower tract is instantly compacted with a freezing ice drink. It's extremely painful. They try to rip the bible out of your hand but you scream "noooooooo!!!!!"

Fortunately for you, a lightning bolt emerges from the sky and vaporizes Deeprac and his brother in law. God says in a deep voice "Johnathan, that isn't for you. I smote those two because Shiva cheated at poker last week and slipped Dionysus an ace card. Really ****ed me off."

I wish I could call it a day right now and hit the pub.
 
You call it a day (That's what most people call it as well - compared to night time) you hit the pub only to find that they closed. You have to go home and enjoy your family. It makes you miss Bubba doesn't it.

I wish I didn't have that whole Russell Stover Chocolate bunny. 500 calories down the drain.
 
Granted. Your dog had it instead.

I wish I could ride in the cockpit on commercial flights.
 
ebykowsky said:
Granted. Your dog had it instead.

I wish I could ride in the cockpit on commercial flights.
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Granted.

"Heh heh heh, hmmm, a boy dog. Say, you ever seen a grown man naked?"

I wish the motorbike didn't have a dead battery.
 
Granted, someone stole the battery, when you parked it on the street, not knowing it was dead.

I wish dinner was ready.
 
John221us said:
Granted, someone stole the battery, when you parked it on the street, not knowing it was dead.

I wish dinner was ready.
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Granted, but it hasn't made it to the stockyard yet, and you happen to be smack in the middle of its pasture wearing red flannel pajamas. He's digging in his hooves right now. He's ready. Too bad you have a cast on your right knee.

I wish I had an operational motorbike right now. I feel like heading down town for lunch.
 
You do have an operational motorbike but it's pink...can't believe you stole a girls bike! How rude.

I wish I had the dog that hate my chocolate bunny so I could cuddle up with him. (Husband allergic to dogs)
 
saracelica said:
You do have an operational motorbike but it's pink...can't believe you stole a girls bike! How rude.

I wish I had the dog that hate my chocolate bunny so I could cuddle up with him. (Husband allergic to dogs)
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Granted. After he died from eating your chocolate you buried him in the old Indian burial grounds and he showed up on your doorstep today.
 
John221us said:
Wish?
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Granted, he made a wish. He wished he had your house, your company, your employees, your car (not the Spyder) and your airplane. As a sideline, he also wished that Sac Arrow could have your housekeeper.

I wish they didn't cut the power in the apartment. Ten stories is a long way to climb the stairs.
 
They kept the power going to the elevator doors, but not the elevator. The doors open, but the car is on the first floor. You don't notice that until you're on top of the car, though.

I would wish for a successful checkride, but I don't want you guys to corrupt that. So, I wish I got playing time in soccer.
 
ebykowsky said:
They kept the power going to the elevator doors, but not the elevator. The doors open, but the car is on the first floor. You don't notice that until you're on top of the car, though.

I would wish for a successful checkride, but I don't want you guys to corrupt that. So, I wish I got playing time in soccer.
Click to expand...

Granted, but, the slotted playing time conflicts with your checkride. Since you wished for soccer, that's what you get. Oh well. I'm sure the examiner is some sort of Brazilian soccer fan, he'll understand.

I wish my favorite lunch spot wasn't affected by the power outage. I'll have to go someplace else.
 
Sac Arrow said:
Granted, but, the slotted playing time conflicts with your checkride. Since you wished for soccer, that's what you get. Oh well. I'm sure the examiner is some sort of Brazilian soccer fan, he'll understand.

I wish my favorite lunch spot wasn't affected by the power outage. I'll have to go someplace else.
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Ebykowsky, good luck tomorrow.

Granted, your lunch spot found a generator, after two days of no power. No use in wasting rotten food, though. You find yourself at the local clinic trying figure out the words for "stomach pump" in the local language.

I wish one of my friends wanted to ski Saturday. There is some good fresh snow, finally.
 
John221us said:
Ebykowsky, good luck tomorrow.

Granted, your lunch spot found a generator, after two days of no power. No use in wasting rotten food, though. You find yourself at the local clinic trying figure out the words for "stomach pump" in the local language.

I wish one of my friends wanted to ski Saturday. There is some good fresh snow, finally.
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Granted, your friend Bubba shows up with a pair of skis and a big smile on his face.

I wish I didn't have to do the stomach pump thing. Although, somehow, I doubt culinary sanitation here is effected much by the absence of electrical power.
 
Sac Arrow said:
Granted, your friend Bubba shows up with a pair of skis and a big smile on his face.

I wish I didn't have to do the stomach pump thing. Although, somehow, I doubt culinary sanitation here is effected much by the absence of electrical power.
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Granted, they don't have a stomach pump, but they have other ways to make you throw up and it tastes awful.

I wish I didn't have to work tomorrow.
 
John221us said:
Granted, they don't have a stomach pump, but they have other ways to make you throw up and it tastes awful.

I wish I didn't have to work tomorrow.
Click to expand...

Granted. You sit back in your plush recliner sipping on a 40 ounce Magnum Malt Liquor, running your fingers through your dreadlocks and gold chains, eyeing Sasha, Laticia, Jamisha, and Tomorrow.

"Yeah mon, I think tonight I will work Sasha and Jamisha. I'll give Tomorrow today off."

You take another hit off that big old spliff, and then break out in a cold sweat, realizing that Tomorrow is your very best producer. She walks out the door and gets in to Jamaal Kingston's Cadillac, never to return.

I wish I didn't have to do another damn six hour drive to the jobsite on Monday.
 
Sac Arrow said:
Granted. You sit back in your plush recliner sipping on a 40 ounce Magnum Malt Liquor, running your fingers through your dreadlocks and gold chains, eyeing Sasha, Laticia, Jamisha, and Tomorrow.

"Yeah mon, I think tonight I will work Sasha and Jamisha. I'll give Tomorrow today off."

You take another hit off that big old spliff, and then break out in a cold sweat, realizing that Tomorrow is your very best producer. She walks out the door and gets in to Jamaal Kingston's Cadillac, never to return.

I wish I didn't have to do another damn six hour drive to the jobsite on Monday.
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Granted, the car broke down, so it is 10 hours on the motorbike. You are going to have to get up early.

I wish we would get another foot of snow in the Sierras before Saturday.
 
Granted. You have to drive Tomorrow instead, but she is in a very bad mood after being kicked out by John.

I wish all planes were direct inject.

Woops. Double post. Take John's.
 
ebykowsky said:
Granted. You have to drive Tomorrow instead, but she is in a very bad mood after being kicked out by John.

I wish all planes were direct inject.

Woops. Double post. Take John's.
Click to expand...

John221us said:
Granted, the car broke down, so it is 10 hours on the motorbike. You are going to have to get up early.

I wish we would get another foot of snow in the Sierras before Saturday.
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Granted. I'll give you two. Good luck skiing on them though.

I wish I went to the local place for lunch and not the overpriced tourist place.
 
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Granted. You eat the chili, and end up like Kane from Alien.

I wish the weather would clear up long enough for me to get my multi-legged XC out of the way...
 
kclimie said:
Granted. You eat the chili, and end up like Kane from Alien.

I wish the weather would clear up long enough for me to get my multi-legged XC out of the way...
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Granted, severe clear for the next 8 hours. Too bad the plane just ate a valve.

I wish I had slept in a little longer.
 
Granted. Your wife tells you to go back and hit the sack, so you drive over to Sac's place and start punching him. He gets mad and launches a SacAttackTM on you and knocks you out. Sac now also has your maid (see a few posts ago) and you wake up in a closet with her keeping watch over you.

I wish I had a seaplane add-on.
 
ebykowsky said:
Granted. Your wife tells you to go back and hit the sack, so you drive over to Sac's place and start punching him. He gets mad and launches a SacAttackTM on you and knocks you out. Sac now also has your maid (see a few posts ago) and you wake up in a closet with her keeping watch over you.

I wish I had a seaplane add-on.
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Does that mean you have your PPL?

Granted, you have a seaplane add-on. Well actually it is more of a stick-on. You have a brand new AOPA window sticker to go on the window of a seaplane.

I wish it was lunch time (one more hour).
 
You do have a seaplane add on but it's only for multi engine airplane. Good luck getting insurance on that thing and/or finding one that'll rent to you with your limited hours.

Wish Instrument Flight Rules knowledge could be learned by osmosis.
 
John221us said:
Does that mean you have your PPL?

Granted, you have a seaplane add-on. Well actually it is more of a stick-on. You have a brand new AOPA window sticker to go on the window of a seaplane.

I wish it was lunch time (one more hour).
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Haha! Really funny because I just got my AOPA sticker in the mail and put it on my car yesterday :lol:

Granted. It is now lunchtime, but I'm now posting this 3 hours later, so I hope you haven't fainted yet. Thanks for the congratulations on the other threads!

I wish Saracelica hadn't posted a minute late.
 
Granted I posted 3 hours before you.

Wish still stands.
 
Granted, according to Webster, osmosis has the following definition:
: movement of a solvent (as water) through a semipermeable membrane (as of a living cell) into a solution of higher solute concentration that tends to equalize the concentrations of solute on the two sides of the membrane

Since this is now the only way for you to learn IFR flight rules, you find yourself drinking copious amounts of water and since what goes in must come out, you find yourself living on the toilet. Your husband is getting kind of tired of refilling your glass, though.

I wish I could have gotten in another hour of skiing today.
 
John221us said:
Granted, according to Webster, osmosis has the following definition:
: movement of a solvent (as water) through a semipermeable membrane (as of a living cell) into a solution of higher solute concentration that tends to equalize the concentrations of solute on the two sides of the membrane

Since this is now the only way for you to learn IFR flight rules, you find yourself drinking copious amounts of water and since what goes in must come out, you find yourself living on the toilet. Your husband is getting kind of tired of refilling your glass, though.

I wish I could have gotten in another hour of skiing today.
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Granted, but it's a day later and you are in Marin County. (Hint, going down rocky cliffs on skis is a very painful experience plus now your skis are shot.)

I wish I didn't have to drive to that godforsaken hell hole project site again this morning. Bad way to start a Monday.
 
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