Pilot - Social Experiment

She IS a winner. Absolutely marvelous, talented, insightful person, and I love her company... it's just hard to live up to her standards, I guess. And maybe she's in love with 'love', not in love with a real human being with all his aggravating and impossible ways....who forgets to lift the seat, or forgets to put it down, I forget which.

And all those nice men of hers? Really fine, smart, interesting, good-looking guys, every one. I wouldn't have fallen for any of them in a romantic way, I don't think, but perfectly delightful company for short visits. As for the man in my life? She wouldn't have given him a second glance. And I'm glad of that for both of our sakes.
 
Geico266 said:
Marriage is a commitment, work, trust, respect, admiration, overlooking leaving the toothpaste cap off, it is compatability, and the ability to forgive EVERYDAY! Unless you put yourself in second place and your spouse in first place you should NEVER get married.
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Bingo.

My bride and I will hit 28 years in November.
 
Just my 2 cents - if I knew that the girl I was interested in was posting all over the internet about it, I would probably have second thoughts...
 
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RyanShort1 said:
Just my .02 cents - if I knew that the girl I was interested in was posting all over the internet about it, I would probably have second thoughts...
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LOL..

You may have a point.
 
RyanShort1 said:
Just my .02 cents - if I knew that the girl I was interested in was posting all over the internet about it, I would probably have second thoughts...
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Nah.

That's the new normal.
 
My opinions, take or leave as you wish...

Love is a decision, not a feeling. Emotions come and go. Decisions last. (And get tested.)

The ancient Greeks had more words for what we have one "love" for.

Eros, describes the rush, the emotions, the heart going pitter-pat. Adrenaline.

Agape, more accurately describes the level necessary for long-term relationships. Choice.

Or as a very wise man told me long ago, "Marriage is getting up in the morning and deciding to show love to your spouse even if you don't *like* them that day. And there's no guarantee it'll go both ways. You can only handle your half."

He had experience. His wife became clinically depressed after the birth of their second child and he said, "I was never 100% sure she wouldn't commit suicide while I was away at work during the day, many days. I did not like her at all. I did however, remain committed to loving her."

Committed to her well-being, because he loved her, they're still married and happy almost 20 years later. Kids mostly off to college, one daughter married to a young man he loves like a son. The reality was that he says he generally disliked his spouse for at least two years.

Most people go into marriage looking for someone else to fulfill their own needs instead of expecting to do just the opposite. That rarely works out well. Disaster, usually.
 
Rndmtrvlr said:
You know, relationships are complex enough that one person's advice is as worthwhile as any other, no matter what the experience of the advisor! :lol:
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Haha, I'm actually very happily single but interaction between people is always interesting to me. I think that's why I hang out on message boards. :D
 
denverpilot said:
Most people go into marriage looking for someone else to fulfill their own needs instead of expecting to do just the opposite. That rarely works out well. Disaster, usually.
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Right there! Very well said. Going into marriage looking for something and hoping the other person will change.
 
kimberlyanne546 said:
Also, he said he checked a box that said "Christian" and that he would only date girls who matched that criteria. I told him I was Catholic . . .
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I have a life long friend she's Catholic, went to Catholic School and all that and she will also say "I'm not a Christian, I'm a Catholic" and that was a statement that always baffled me... "Don't you have to be a Christian to be a Catholic?" Nope, guess not. So many religious get so caught up in the dogmas they forget to stop and think.
 
I am genuinely surprised I am the only one in the tech savvy group who has heard of and understands the implications of Skype.
 
steingar said:
I am genuinely surprised I am the only one in the tech savvy group who has heard of and understands the implications of Skype.
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I have been using Skype for years, since they first started. Which implications exactly am I not understanding?
 
Henning said:
I have been using Skype for years, since they first started. Which implications exactly am I not understanding?
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That with Skype no one need go on a blind date. That your first view of a potential date can be in the comfort of your own home. That you can become familiar, and maybe even iron out some of these pesky issues without the pressure and other issues of a public social setting.
 
Oh what the heck. One more on the way to passing Pattern Madness...

 
Henning said:
I have a life long friend she's Catholic, went to Catholic School and all that and she will also say "I'm not a Christian, I'm a Catholic" and that was a statement that always baffled me... "Don't you have to be a Christian to be a Catholic?" Nope, guess not. So many religious get so caught up in the dogmas they forget to stop and think.
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There are some pretty significant differences when you get down to points of doctrine.
 
kimberlyanne546 said:
Good contenders? An ex-drug dealer is a good contender? I didn't tell you everything about each one you know.
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We can only go by what you tell us.

I've only been married for 17 months. So I'm no expert but I married a friend that's seen me through EVERYTHING...we met in college 17 years ago and never lost touch. :)

Anywho, marriage is WORK everyday. If you're not ready to work just as hard in marriage as you are for flying lessons, in your paid job, in the dating thing I'd warn against getting married!

Marriage can be fun and it's fun having someone around to do stuff with and have a built in person to protect the homestead but it's work EVERYDAY! I never lived with him before marriage because it's against our religion (We are in it for the long haul through thick and thin - divorce is NOT an option for us) If he does something that annoys me I choose my battles.

Good Luck Kim with your dating. Go for personality more then looks (looks fade over time, personality doesn't.)
 
RyanShort1 said:
There are some pretty significant differences when you get down to points of doctrine.
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Sorry, but if you think Christ is/was Lord you are a Christian,

Everything else is Dogma, there are some BIG differences there but the underlying fact remains as above.

Duncan (Ipicopalian (sp) and Catholic educated Presbretirean (sp) marying a Mormon):wink2:
 
Skylane81E said:
Sorry, but if you think Christ is/was Lord you are a Christian,

Everything else is Dogma, there are some BIG differences there but the underlying fact remains as above.

Duncan (Ipicopalian (sp) and Catholic educated Presbretirean (sp) marying a Mormon):wink2:
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Warning.... This is headed to SZ.:yesnod::yikes:
 
lol, there's a reason I just put up the base idea and didn't expand on it:rofl:

Could have killed it quick, and I see no reason to do so
 
I'm sitting here on pins and needles, waiting to hear how the comedy club was... and the flying.
 
Amelia said:
I'm sitting here on pins and needles, waiting to hear how the comedy club was... and the flying.
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Well here you go.

Unfortunately, this may be the death of the topic.

Flying - there was no flying, canceled due to weather. I spent the day doing work to earn enough money to help pay for my next flight which is at the end of this week.

Last night - I went to a comedy club. It was my second date with Bachelor #1 - who was now in a cast / bandage after wrist surgery.

There is a two drink minumum, so I had the minimum: two beers (I was driving, he'd taken the subway). He had more than two, not sure how many.

We laughed and he seemed to be having a good time.

Long story short, I end up giving him a ride home. He asks if he can give me a tour of the place. I say sure but that I have to be home to my dog, and that I have to work the next day.

Well apparently he had "other" ideas and it was very difficult for me to leave. I don't want to say that I felt scared - but it was not a good thing.

Finally out of there in one piece, and glad to be gone, I drove down the street and pulled over to the side of the road. I read and re-read the "marriage" advice in this thread - and decided to contact "him".

Not only did he reply but he drove all the way to my apartment to have a face to face talk. I have known this person for almost 7 years and he has been with me through the WORST times of my life, as well as the best times. What we lacked was good communication.

We both have "our own lives" right now but have often thought of one another and for the most part stayed in touch. However, there have been periods of time when we did not speak to each other at all - including several months this year during my pilot training.

To still have feelings after all this time is just - something very amazing. It would take a lot of work, and planning, and communication, but I think perhaps I should have understood why I stayed with him for so many years in the first place. (Yes, he loves planes and owning a plane together one day is a real possibility.)
 
saracelica said:
We can only go by what you tell us.

I've only been married for 17 months. So I'm no expert but I married a friend that's seen me through EVERYTHING...we met in college 17 years ago and never lost touch. :)

Anywho, marriage is WORK everyday. If you're not ready to work just as hard in marriage as you are for flying lessons, in your paid job, in the dating thing I'd warn against getting married!

Marriage can be fun and it's fun having someone around to do stuff with and have a built in person to protect the homestead but it's work EVERYDAY! I never lived with him before marriage because it's against our religion (We are in it for the long haul through thick and thin - divorce is NOT an option for us) If he does something that annoys me I choose my battles.

Good Luck Kim with your dating. Go for personality more then looks (looks fade over time, personality doesn't.)
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Thank you - I read your post to him and thanked him for all he had been through. He put up with me long ago when I was going through tough times and he never once left.

(No, I don't think he read this thread but yes I told him about it. I believe in honesty.)
 
kimberlyanne546 said:
Good grief.

You will never stop will you? I am not an actress.
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Perhaps you should look into that as a career. Sounds like you've got the looks at least. I'm sure there can't be very many good looking young women trying to make it in Hollywood so the competition ought to be minimal:D:no:
 
MBDiagMan said:
I really hate having to write this post, because in it I have to insult some of my POA brothers.

For those of you who are attached, you get a pass on my insult. Those of you who are UNattached and not trying to get to know Kimberly better, you are either forced to use a Brail keyboard, or you are IDIOTS!

If I were 30 years younger and single, I would most definitely be trying get to know her better.

Doc
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If only Kimberly owned an airplane, she'd be every single pilot's dream.:D:D:D
 
Good luck Kimberly.

FWIW no shame in using a dating service. Two people coming together is the important part...how should not be.
 
Everskyward said:
As long as we are giving our opinion, I agree with this wholeheartedly.

As far as religion goes, I know couples who have different religions or different levels of religious beliefs. I think this can work as long as each party respects the other's opinion and doesn't put pressure for change on their partner. The same would go for political beliefs. However if both parties are dead set on opposite sides it can be difficult.
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I had an uncle and aunt that were truly soul mates yet he was as indifferent about religion as can be and she was a devout Catholic. Her only "demand" was that the kids (there were 5) be raised as Catholic to the extent that the kids would comply and that she would be able to attend Mass regularly. I think that besides for weddings and funerals he went to church about twice during their 50 some year marriage and yet they got along like Ozzy and Harriet. I suspect the key to their marital success was that both were not only rather fond of each other, they were both quite tolerant of each other's beliefs. For some folks it's hugely important that everyone they associate with (and especially the one(s) they marry) share their fundamental beliefs. For others, not so much. Compatibility can be achieved in multiple ways.
 
Everskyward said:
As long as we are giving our opinion, I agree with this wholeheartedly.

As far as religion goes, I know couples who have different religions or different levels of religious beliefs. I think this can work as long as each party respects the other's opinion and doesn't put pressure for change on their partner. The same would go for political beliefs. However if both parties are dead set on opposite sides it can be difficult.
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Even if only one party is "dead set" and the other merely want's to be allowed to disagree silently, a match is unlikely to be successful.
 
gismo said:
If only Kimberly owned an airplane, she'd be every single pilot's dream.:D:D:D
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Especially if Kim was a CFI and A&P.

No arguements on who is the left seat and who is in the right seat.
 
RyanShort1 said:
Just my 2 cents - if I knew that the girl I was interested in was posting all over the internet about it, I would probably have second thoughts...
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Not me, I'd be all over the posts looking for clues to win her over. It would be like secretly having her confidant as a good friend.
 
steingar said:
That with Skype no one need go on a blind date. That your first view of a potential date can be in the comfort of your own home. That you can become familiar, and maybe even iron out some of these pesky issues without the pressure and other issues of a public social setting.
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That's plausible but personally when I was dating (if I can trust a memory that old) I would have much preferred a physical meeting over a video chat. A big part of one's makeup is how they interact with everyone around them as well as what percentage of their attention they're willing to commit to the person they're on a date with. Skype is so one on one that none of that applies (unless one of the Skype-ees keeps breaking off to converse with someone local. Also I suspect that it's a lot easier to act differently on video than in person but I don't have any evidence or facts to back up that opinion.
 
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