why did you have kids?

Old Geek said:
After watching the blood, mucus and poop that came with the baby, changing diapers was a non-issue.
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Amen to that.. I was DETERMINED to not see the fun bits of my wife stretched and mutilated like that, but i HAD to watch when the big day came, and I am glad i did.. my face was one of the first my son saw (born face up)
 
sferguson524 said:
Amen to that.. I was DETERMINED to not see the fun bits of my wife stretched and mutilated like that, but i HAD to watch when the big day came, and I am glad i did.. my face was one of the first my son saw (born face up)
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The worst thing I saw that day was the epidural. Creepy.
 
I cut the umbilical cord on both kids. It was the experience of a lifetime.

It sounds gross, but strangely it isnt. In fact, the whole birth process was magical, in a scary sort of way.
 
JOhnH said:
Actually, it is a slight. You and others keep saying that just because you didn't know what it would be like to have kids, until you had them, that means that we don't know what it would be like, or if we would like it. That is a false assumption. You are reducing our ability to think for ourselves based on your own ability. And that is not intended to be a mean or sarcastic comment, but that is the way you come across.

I practically raised my siblings in a house run by an alcoholic step father and a submissive mother. I loved my siblings as much as you love your kids. But I still don't want any of my own.

I think there is some sort of genetic disposition that causes some people to desire kids. I don't have that predisposition. And fortunately, neither does my wife.
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I don't know John, I don't think he intended to slight anybody. It's a little like being a pilot and explaining aviation to a non-pilot. They can learn all there is to know, become completely immersed in it, even work in the industry, but until he actually take the controls, he simply doesn't know what it's like to fly an airplane.

Until you've actually been through the process, seen your own children being born and felt the powerful emotions that run through your body, you simply don't know.
 
garyb said:
I don't know John, I don't think he intended to slight anybody. It's a little like being a pilot and explaining aviation to a non-pilot. They can learn all there is to know, become completely immersed in it, even work in the industry, but until he actually take the controls, he simply doesn't know what it's like to fly an airplane.

Until you've actually been through the process, seen your own children being born and felt the powerful emotions that run through your body, you simply don't know.
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That is a fair analogy , but...

Pilots usually are a calculating type of personality... If we decide any flight has unusual, dangerous or any other risk, we can terminate that flight within minutes and re-assess the situation. Fathering /Mothering a child will go on for the REST of your life and there is no putting it back and getting a replay...

Personally, I like to control my destiny and I chose to not have kids since alot of things can happen over a lifetime and you are basically "not driving the bus" any more...

Take for instance the family of the sniper shooter... In TV interviews the family claims he was out of control and headed for big problems.... And yet there was nothing they could do to stop it... That would be my biggest nightmare.... IMHO....

Congrats to all the people who have chillings... It just ain't for me..:no::no::nonod:...
 
I had a friend who would have been a great mother because she had a great mother who had a great mother. Unfortunately, it wasn't to be so she had cats. Nothing wrong with that. They had a great (substitute) mother.
Children are a choice like everything in life. You don't know what you are missing. Then again, I have yet to build a plane or do open heart surgery. Some things are meant to be missed.
 
N801BH said:
That is a fair analogy , but...
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It was a fair analogy, for whatever that is worth.
But I could hear a similar analogy from religious fanatics, crack dealers and even worse, glider pilots and parachutists.

Parenthood is fine for many/most people, but not for all.
Think of all the child abuse from parents that didn't have the same emotional response to their kids as some posters here.
Think of all the wrecked marriages where the father deserts the wife and kids for a less restrictive life.
Think of all the fathers that devote their lives to their work so they don't have to go home to the mayhem.

I'm thinking I would be one of those. And even if a happy father doesn't mean it to be a slight when they tell me I am more ignorant than they are because they have kids and I don't, I still take it as a slight.

So if you love your kids more than life itself, that is a good thing and I enjoy hearing those stories. But if you think I am wrong because I am not like you, you are insulting me, whether you mean it that way or not. (This is not aimed at you Ben).
 
It could be too, that we are only hearing one side of the story from both sides. Remember this is an open internet forum where it might be very uncomfortable to post something like, "I had children but wish I hadn't". That would leave the poster open to all kinds of crap.
 
I admit there are times I wish I didn't have children.
 
Everskyward said:
It could be too, that we are only hearing one side of the story from both sides. Remember this is an open internet forum where it might be very uncomfortable to post something like, "I had children but wish I hadn't". That would leave the poster open to all kinds of crap.
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Also consider that having children isn't easy for all couples. Some of us had to try hard and that effort included some sad moments along the way. For folks in that position, defending their choice is very personal.

Adult children can become your best friends. My daughter and wife are in DC to attend a science conference together. A dream come true for my wife. A very thoughtful birthday present from my daughter.
 
Geico266 said:
Wait til you have grand kids. :yes: Even better.
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I saw a bumper sticker once that said, "If I had known how much better grandkids were I would have had them first!"

I have no kids of my own and never wanted any, but I raised my stepson from the time he was 6 and enjoyed it. He's 21 and in college now.
 
Stewartb said:
Also consider that having children isn't easy for all couples. Some of us had to try hard and that effort included some sad moments along the way. For folks in that position, defending their choice is very personal.
..........
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This........ Some also tried very hard and were not successful..... I imagine this is a very tough subject for them.
 
Steingar: Karen got a chance to read the thread this morning, and got a chuckle out of being "in a lecture". Heh.
 
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