New form of medical torture

Van Johnston

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Van Johnston
Woke up this morning to an e-mail from an employee telling me he was moving his planned PTO day on Friday to today because "Colonoscopy opening became available."

What evil doctor schedules colonoscopies the day after Thanksgiving?
 
Woke up this morning to an e-mail from an employee telling me he was moving his planned PTO day on Friday to today because "Colonoscopy opening became available."

What evil doctor schedules colonoscopies the day after Thanksgiving?

Who would take an appointment on that day???? Maybe he didn't understand what he was getting himself into prep wise?
 
usually would be, um, openings in the schedule...

btw - a friend had knee replacement surgery and might have needed a procedure to breakthrough lack of range of motion. The doctor had scheduled him for Thanksgiving morning.
 
Woke up this morning to an e-mail from an employee telling me he was moving his planned PTO day on Friday to today because "Colonoscopy opening became available."

What evil doctor schedules colonoscopies the day after Thanksgiving?
Sounds more like he's getting it today, which is short notice for the prep.
 
My first one was the day after the super bowl.
 
Who would take an appointment on that day???? Maybe he didn't understand what he was getting himself into prep wise?
Maybe figures won't gain too much weight from Thanksgiving dinner?
 
If you think about it, that is the best possible day for it!

If you know what the "prep" does to you, you can eat as mush as you want and it won't matter one bit.

Just make sure you are at home when all this goes down...
 
He'll have to fast and prep on Thanksgiving Day for a Friday procedure. If his procedure was scheduled for Saturday, then the Friday prep after the feast would be a toilet-wrecking, sewer-clogging nightmare.
 
'black hole Friday'


I can see the promotion.
 
He'll have to fast and prep on Thanksgiving Day for a Friday procedure. If his procedure was scheduled for Saturday, then the Friday prep after the feast would be a toilet-wrecking, sewer-clogging nightmare.
It's a good thing he switched from Friday to today.
 
Woke up this morning to an e-mail from an employee telling me he was moving his planned PTO day on Friday to today because "Colonoscopy opening became available."

What evil doctor schedules colonoscopies the day after Thanksgiving?
One that needs some boat payments.
 
Well, here’s hoping it all comes out ok.
 
It's a good thing he switched from Friday to today.

Day after thanksgiving or today with no time to prep? Either way it makes no sense. I’m suspicious that employee is making an excuse to get an extra day off this holiday week. OP needs to get to the bottom of this.
 
Who would take an appointment on that day???? Maybe he didn't understand what he was getting himself into prep wise?

He should have thought this through more. But - hindsight is 20 20………..

I think he is at the age where this is probably his first one and he didn’t know what exactly he was getting himself into. I took a 1p appt my first time; will never do that again. Only early mornings from now on.

Sounds more like he's getting it today, which is short notice for the prep.

Day after thanksgiving or today with no time to prep? Either way it makes no sense. I’m suspicious that employee is making an excuse to get an extra day off this holiday week. OP needs to get to the bottom of this.

We have to force this guy to take time off. I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt that the schedule change was made in time to do the prep, and he just didn’t inform me till yesterday. He moved his day off from Friday to Tuesday; that’s all. We don’t have sick leave, only PTO; so moving time off for a colonoscopy all works out in the end…

Still perplexed that Friday was even an option. First world problem.
 
I think he is at the age where this is probably his first one and he didn’t know what exactly he was getting himself into. I took a 1p appt my first time; will never do that again. Only early mornings from now on.

Wow, yeah, the day of, after a day of no food, I’m a monster. I can’t imagine waiting til the afternoon. Drive me in at 6:00am, get me sedated by 7:30 before I kill someone, and take me to a restaurant at 10:00.

We have to force this guy to take time off. I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt that the schedule change was made in time to do the prep, and he just didn’t inform me till yesterday. He moved his day off from Friday to Tuesday; that’s all. We don’t have sick leave, only PTO; so moving time off for a colonoscopy all works out in the end…

Haha! I didn’t really expect an answer, I was just setting it up so I could use the word “bottom”. :D

Still perplexed that Friday was even an option. First world problem.

Me too. Maybe some people don’t celebrate thanksgiving. You would think most non-urgent procedures wouldn’t ever be scheduled on Black Friday. With the blow out sales and all…
 
I woke up during my procedure for a moment...told the nurse I did not like the moving playing on her tv...went back to sleep...not joking ! :)
 
I woke up during my procedure for a moment...told the nurse I did not like the moving playing on her tv...went back to sleep...not joking ! :)

I woke up during an upper endoscopy and thought that what was going on on the screen was very interesting so I asked the doctor to turn it so I could see it better, but with the garden hose down my throat it came out, “mmmmph mmmmph” and the doctor said, “Up the Demerol.”
 
Woke up this morning to an e-mail from an employee telling me he was moving his planned PTO day on Friday to today because "Colonoscopy opening became available."

What evil doctor schedules colonoscopies the day after Thanksgiving?

My “colonoscopy opening” is never “available.”
 
Day after thanksgiving or today with no time to prep? Either way it makes no sense. I’m suspicious that employee is making an excuse to get an extra day off this holiday week. OP needs to get to the bottom of this.
The only way I could make sense of his post was if he was referring to the day after Thanksgiving.
 
Woke up this morning to an e-mail from an employee telling me he was moving his planned PTO day on Friday to today because "Colonoscopy opening became available."

What evil doctor schedules colonoscopies the day after Thanksgiving?

And what, you think the anti social shouldn’t be able to get medical care.
 
My doc was kind enough to schedule me for a Cologuard, a few years ago.

It was easy and convenient, and needed no prep.

So long as those keep coming back negative, I hope to seldom need a real colonoscopy.
 
Propofol ... and then you'll understand ... ;)

That stuff is remarkable. No 'twilight' period, as far as I can tell. It's 'lights out'...and then...'lights on'. At least that's what it seems like to me.

That might be what they gave me another time, I think I was having another endoscopy. I said, “When are you going to start?” And they said, “We’re all done!”
 
That might be what they gave me another time, I think I was having another endoscopy. I said, “When are you going to start?” And they said, “We’re all done!”
That was my ortho surgery. I was talking to the anesthesiologist in preop and then suddenly my wife was with me in recovery. For my colonoscopy, I got the count down thing and started feeling sleepier and sleepier....
 
That stuff is remarkable. No 'twilight' period, as far as I can tell. It's 'lights out'...and then...'lights on'. At least that's what it seems like to me.

'Milk of amnesia'
 
My doc was kind enough to schedule me for a Cologuard, a few years ago.

It was easy and convenient, and needed no prep.

So long as those keep coming back negative, I hope to seldom need a real colonoscopy.

No…. By the time they come back positive it’s a little too late, unless you like to poop in a bag. ;)
 
No…. By the time they come back positive it’s a little too late, unless you like to poop in a bag. ;)

Except, because of false positives, you still only have a 5% chance of having colon cancer (although your point is that if you do, it’s further along and might be less treatable than if you’d caught it earlier with a colonoscopy.) Usually, all that happens is you buy yourself a colonoscopy that finds no cancer.

On the other hand, because of false negatives, you have a 0.06% chance of actually having cancer if your Cologuard is negative.

The above numbers are in a certain population. Your individual odds differ depending on a lot of factors. But say those odds do apply to you. The question is, is it worth doing the whole prep and colonoscopy when the Cologuard, if negative, is 99.94% likely to be a true negative? And if positive, a 95% chance it’s wrong and you are cancer free?

The real risk of using Cologuard is simply that you may have to undergoing an unnecessary colonoscopy and they are not without risk themselves. But the alternatives are doing the colonoscopy in the first place instead, or doing nothing, which is inadvisable. I view the Cologuard as an intermediate option to consider.

The Cologuard false results are a snapshot in time; one must think about lifetime risk, which is 4-7% (in the population referenced below), and increasing risk with age, and affected by race, lifestyle, family history, etc. The longer you go not doing the eyes on colonoscopy, the more you’re gambling that you don’t end up with the poop bag.

Like all medical decisions this should be made by individual choice with one’s own doctor. There is no right or wrong for everyone.

https://retroflexions.com/endoscopy...colon-cancer-after-a-positive-cologuard-test/
 
Except, because of false positives, you still only have a 5% chance of having colon cancer (although your point is that if you do, it’s further along and might be less treatable than if you’d caught it earlier with a colonoscopy.) Usually, all that happens is you buy yourself a colonoscopy that finds no cancer.

On the other hand, because of false negatives, you have a 0.06% chance of actually having cancer if your Cologuard is negative.

The above numbers are in a certain population. Your individual odds differ depending on a lot of factors. But say those odds do apply to you. The question is, is it worth doing the whole prep and colonoscopy when the Cologuard, if negative, is 99.94% likely to be a true negative? And if positive, a 95% chance it’s wrong and you are cancer free?

The real risk of using Cologuard is simply that you may have to undergoing an unnecessary colonoscopy and they are not without risk themselves. But the alternatives are doing the colonoscopy in the first place instead, or doing nothing, which is inadvisable. I view the Cologuard as an intermediate option to consider.

The Cologuard false results are a snapshot in time; one must think about lifetime risk, which is 4-7% (in the population referenced below), and increasing risk with age, and affected by race, lifestyle, family history, etc. The longer you go not doing the eyes on colonoscopy, the more you’re gambling that you don’t end up with the poop bag.

Like all medical decisions this should be made by individual choice with one’s own doctor. There is no right or wrong for everyone.

https://retroflexions.com/endoscopy...colon-cancer-after-a-positive-cologuard-test/

Cancer is totally worth the gamble.
 
Propofol ... and then you'll understand ... ;)

:yeahthat: Propofol is wonderful stuff. I remember feeling a desperate need to tell the nurse that the clock was suddenly moving around on the wall...the next thing I knew I was waking up from what felt like 8 solid hours of sleep even though it was no more than 30 minutes.

I felt 100% and ready to drive home, but the wife wouldn't let me. :frown3::rofl:
 
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