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Discussion in 'Hangar Talk' started by Let'sgoflying!, Feb 9, 2007.
Forgive me if this has aleady been posted . . .
An old trapper walks into town to re-provision and goes to the dentist for a tooth ache before heading back out to the wilderness. The dentist tells the trapper that the tooth needs to be pulled. The trapper tells the dentist to pull the tooth so he can get out of town as he is not very social and doesn’t like being in town. As the dentist reaches for the Novocaine the old trapper said “I don’t have time to wait for the Novocaine, just pull the tooth”. The dentist replies that tooth extraction is very painful, at which the trapper replies “I've know real pain twice in my life and this could not come close”.
Curious, the dentist asked what could be more painful than tooth extraction without anesthesia?
A while back while out trapping, explains the trapper, I had to take dump real bad. I quickly dropped my pants and squatted, and as I did my testicles hit the trigger on a beaver trap and it snapped shut on my testicles.
The dentist asks what could possibly cause more pain more than that.
Trapper replies, when I reached the end of the chain!
The doctor was giving me a digital prostrate exam and said it didn’t feel quite right. I said I would like a second opinion at which time he switched hands and did it again. I told him I was going to report him to the AMA for conduct completely unbecoming a dentist.
FTFY... it’s Prostate not Prostrate
Anybody want a fire retardant bath?
Sounds about right, doesn’t it @SkyDog58?
good un Ryan!
After a hard landing on AAL in Denver, both the Captain and FO were standing at the front saying goodby to the passengers.
As I came up to them, I asked the captain who performed the landing. He pointed at the FO.
AggieMike: "Ahhh... you must have been in the Navy, not the Air Force, and you were going for the 2nd wire."
The FO turned beet red, and the captain started laughing his ass off. Turns out they were both in the Air Force.
I had that hard landing I've mention before flying a CRJ 900. I was so embarrassed I didn't open the cockpit door. No way no how!
Megan Mullally was the perfect actress for that role.
And for fans of the chosen ones, cough, Royals...
Ba dum tsssss
I torture my wife with bad jokes like that. She just loooooooves them.
Alexa helps me now too.
“What position does Kool Aid Man play in baseball?
Relief pitcher. Oh Yeah!”
Karen is a trooper for putting up with that!
"Authorities said the suspects took the victim's keys and started the vehicle, but realized they couldn't drive a manual transmission so they ran from the scene."
I was on that plane.!!!.... actually I was jump seating a 900 that landed hard. The pilot that had flown it to the airport where I boarded the plane was jumpseating back to the original departure airport. We were sitting together and talking like pilots do. The flight was smooth, and smooth in the clouds on the approach. We broke out at about 2500 AGL and the pilot immediately powered up and went missed. The other jumpseater and myself looked at each other and said try this again. The rest of the flight was smooth, broke out at around 2500 AGL again, still smooth ride when BAM..!!! Solid touchdown.
After parking the other pilot and myself squeezed into the cockpit. The FO was pointing at the captain....who was sitting there with his hand over his face and shaking his head...... sorry guys..... I laugh, don't worry, we all do it, but usually without pilot passengers..!!
My wife was going through her wardrobe and said...
"Look at this, it still fits me after 25 years!"
I said "It's a freaking scarf."
The doctor was giving me a digital prostate exam and said it didn’t feel quite right. I said I would like a second opinion, so he used two fingers.