With respect to every expressed opinion re the thread, I recently found myself in a very difficult position. The deceased had been my neighbor(back home), my Sunday School Superintendent, Assistant Scoutmaster. His wife grew up 2 houses away from my father. He and his wife were my original singing partners in church music(I was 10 years old on the first occasion). The memorial service was "to be announced," because there were family members to come from states as far as California. I was asked(honored) to be a soloist as I had been at his 80+ surprise birthday party, several months earlier.
The date became set for a Tuesday night. Perfect! I was in "Hell Week," the week preceding the opening of a big musical production, and Tuesday was to be an off night.
Then it fell apart. Because grandchildren could only arrive on Wednesday from distant states the service was set for Thursday evening. No joy!
Thursday night would be final dress rehearsal for Friday opening night. That's when every nuance, whether speech, blocking, costume, music, dance, stage crew would be re-finessed, in so many words the last chance. When every actor is reliant on each other's speech, action, timing, and delivery there's no way I as a principal role could say to the cast, "I can't be there Thursday night."
The service was so attended that adjacent rooms had to be utilized for the overflow. I missed seeing 60 years of friends and acquaintances from far and wide. And worst of all I missed -------------- Walter. I only hope he missed me. I'll not forget.
HR