Crop dusted my wife...

Discussion in 'Hangar Talk' started by tawood, Nov 5, 2017.

  1. tawood

    tawood Pattern Altitude

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    Where I come from, “crop dusting” can mean having flatulence while walking past someone...it’s particularly effective when the person you are walking past is seated. It’s even more effective if your flatulence is of the silent variety...

    Sorry, but when I read post after post pushing a book called “The Crop Duster’s Wife”, it brought this to my mind... this may shed some light as to why I am now divorced.
     
  2. SixPapaCharlie

    SixPapaCharlie May the force be with you

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    Sweet! Where can I find this book?
    I can't find a reference to it anywhere.
     
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  3. MtnMarcus

    MtnMarcus Pre-takeoff checklist

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    oh yes....we are very much familiar with this terminology in our household as well as "tooting", "floating an air biscuit", "pushing dirty air", "a barking spider", "sharting".......and my personal favorite,"The One Cheek Sneak".
     
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  4. ktup-flyer

    ktup-flyer Pattern Altitude

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    Is Dutch ovening the sequal?
     
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  5. Anymouse

    Anymouse En-Route

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    You forgot "strafing run."
     
  6. GlennAB1

    GlennAB1 Ejection Handle Pulled

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    Yes, starting out working on Air Force fighters, that is the term I can relate to.
     
  7. mscard88

    mscard88 Touchdown! Greaser!

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    When I toot at home around my grandson, he laughs and says pop pop the doorbell's ringing again. Our little fart joke.
     
    Last edited: Nov 6, 2017
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  8. Fearless Tower

    Fearless Tower Touchdown! Greaser!

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    Just look for Mscard’s big bag of popcorn...
     
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  9. Bill Jennings

    Bill Jennings Final Approach

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    Alright, who beefed?
     
  10. PaulS

    PaulS Final Approach

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    This thread stinks.
     
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  11. eman1200

    eman1200 Final Approach

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    hide yer daughters, hide yer wives, they're crop dustin' e'rbody out here.
     
  12. Bill Jennings

    Bill Jennings Final Approach

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    Reminds me of my favorite AC/DC lyric: "Lock up your daughter, lock up your wife, lock up the backdoor and run for your life..."
     
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  13. mscard88

    mscard88 Touchdown! Greaser!

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    Big bag of what? :D
     
  14. mscard88

    mscard88 Touchdown! Greaser!

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    Something smells, anyone been eating beans?
     
  15. Norman

    Norman En-Route Gone West

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    Beans, Beans, the musical fruit................
     
  16. paflyer

    paflyer Final Approach

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  17. Ryanb

    Ryanb Final Approach PoA Supporter

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    The husband literally ‘split wind’ if ya get my drift.
     
  18. Norman

    Norman En-Route Gone West

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    Blazing Saddles was one of the most entertaining movies I ever watched.
     
  19. Checkout_my_Six

    Checkout_my_Six Final Approach

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    sounds like the OP should write a book.....:confused:
     
  20. Zeldman

    Zeldman Final Approach

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  21. Zeldman

    Zeldman Final Approach

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    I crop dusted an empty aisle in Walmart once. I stopped at the end and looked back. There were some people, a family of 4 obviously not from the local area that turned and walked up the aisle. They hit the cloud, stopped, and looked accusingly at each other.

    My wife asked me what was so funny.......so I told her. She got mad at me, then later walking to our vehicle she started laughing.
     
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  22. Zeldman

    Zeldman Final Approach

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    My song now is. "Beans, Beans, they're good for your heart....."
     
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  23. JD318

    JD318 Pre-Flight

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    I crop dusted myself once...

    Empty aisle in Cabela's. I knew I needed to get out of there. Moved to the next aisle and a Cabela's employee walked up to me just then to see if I needed help finding anything. As I was mentally congratulating myself for getting out of the crop dusted aisle just in the nick of time, I mentioned to the guy that I was looking for a pair of lightweight hunting boots. He said, "Follow me." He took me right back to the dusted aisle and started showing me a couple different boots.
     
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  24. Norman

    Norman En-Route Gone West

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    So are the two Delmoico's I have in the freezer. They keep my heart beating.
     
  25. kyleb

    kyleb En-Route

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    Once upon a time when I was asleep, I delivered a mighty blast which was enough to wake me up. For whatever reason (at 3AM) I thought it was funny enough that I started laughing uncontrollably. Which, of course, awakened SWMBO into a gas cloud slightly less toxic than the one over Bhopal. I barely survived (the gas cloud or her wrath). She moved to a different room for the night.

    I caught the stink eye for a day for that one.

    Still makes me laugh.
     
  26. Bill Jennings

    Bill Jennings Final Approach

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    My brother “plays turtle” with his wife. When he feels a particularly nasty beef coming on, he pull the covers up over their heads and holds it there. How he’s still married I’ll never know.
     
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  27. tawood

    tawood Pattern Altitude

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    Sounds like you crop dusted her eye...
     
  28. mscard88

    mscard88 Touchdown! Greaser!

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    Hell thats an old as my ass, probably longer. My wife loved it. NOT!
     
  29. rpadula

    rpadula En-Route

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    When I was at Tech, we had this game called "6 inches." Object was to crop dust someone within 6 inches of their face.

    Sprawled out on the couch to watch TV was dangerous territory! :rofl:
     
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  30. Zeldman

    Zeldman Final Approach

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    My wife sleeps completely under the covers, something she did in the Philippines to get away from mosquitoes.

    She makes it too easy for me.....
     
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  31. mscard88

    mscard88 Touchdown! Greaser!

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    Sometimes ya gotta really hold them down, other hand holding the covers. A lot of multi-tasking going on. But it's worth it, or was. Doubt I could get away with it now though. :D
     
  32. eaglepilot

    eaglepilot Pre-takeoff checklist

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    Going to the Dr office with my daughter, walked into the empty elevator that had been crop dusted.
    We suffered the 2 floors ride, and as we walked out the only person waiting to take the elevator was a neighbour...who is
    very prim and proper. Imagine her thoughts about us as she entered the elevator that still stunk.
     
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  33. denverpilot

    denverpilot Taxi to Parking

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    It’s probably right next to The Bridges of Madison County at the bookstore, but I’ll let you go into that aisle to find it. I ain’t going there. :)

    We call that a “Dutch Oven” ‘round these parts.
     
  34. Joseph Schimnich

    Joseph Schimnich Filing Flight Plan

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    More than once have I been Dutch Ovened by a student in an airplane. Cessna's it's okay, Pipers you have no choice but to suffer.
     
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  35. Bill Jennings

    Bill Jennings Final Approach

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    The worst place I've ever been beefed is the choir loft at church. Yes, I sing in the choir. So there you are seated in the loft, and just before singing a big number, someone (I think I know who) lets out one nasty eye watering nausea inducing SBD beef. Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, and now I have to stand up and take in many many deep breaths and sing. Oh joy. I thought I was going to barf.
     
  36. SkyDog58

    SkyDog58 Touchdown! Greaser!

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    Just remember, you must plow the field before crop dusting as you might be denied access afterwards.
     
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  37. mscard88

    mscard88 Touchdown! Greaser!

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    Guarantee you'll be denied! :fingerwag:
     
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  38. Anymouse

    Anymouse En-Route

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    Still waiting on all the flying cars.

    23517556_2266121246738783_1432004737853768642_n.jpg
     
  39. mscard88

    mscard88 Touchdown! Greaser!

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    Different flavors available?
     
  40. Ryanb

    Ryanb Final Approach PoA Supporter

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    So instead of smelling what I thought to be fresh breath, is actually somebody who just cut the cheese? I bet someone is going to make a lot of dough off that!
     
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