Pilot - Social Experiment

kimberlyanne546 said:
No I mis-spoke. I meant active military. My friend's husband was sent to war overseas twice. I couldn't deal with that sort of worry.

Veterans who are no longer in the military are usually married already.
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Okay, that is what I thought, carry on. ;)
 
Geico266 said:
Okay, that is what I thought, carry on. ;)
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LOL. Plus all my rules have exceptions. It is entirely dependent on each individual. I've seen enough men cheat on both myself and others that I am no longer attracted to men whose work involves extensive amounts of travel while they are alone or with co-workers. Not saying men can't be trusted but there are definitely situations that increase your odds of a man "accidentally" getting drunk and getting some girl pregnant.
 
If you're wanting to date a pilot...Are you a member of the 99's and if so is there what I call a 'Mother Hen' in that group? My most memorable interaction with a 99 was someone who tried to set me up with any of the single members of her group.

Come to think of it, she had just found out I was an owner and actually seen my plane. How's the story go...send picture of plane? She did take a picture of my plane, but not me! So maybe I fall in that category! :)
 
Boelcke said:
If you're wanting to date a pilot...Are you a member of the 99's and if so is there what I call a 'Mother Hen' in that group? My most memorable interaction with a 99 was someone who tried to set me up with any of the single members of her group.

Come to think of it, she had just found out I was an owner and actually seen my plane. How's the story go...send picture of plane? She did take a picture of my plane, but not me! So maybe I fall in that category! :)
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I don't date women.
 
kimberlyanne546 said:
I don't date women.
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Not that there's anything wrong with that....but it is Kalifornia!

No, what I was talking about was some people are compulsive match makers...maybe one of them will set you up.

In the words of Adrian Cronauer..."Why am I here!" :)
 
What is up with all these color boards?

Red, blue, purple? What is it all about?
 
Ahh.. I guess I need to... Stay in more? Lol
 
;) I get plenty of kicks watching feathers puff up here, I don't need another color.
 
Everskyward said:
I don't hang out on all these boards. I waste enough time [cough] on this one. :rofl:
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Ditto. I only joined the Red Board because of the number of CA pilots and now tomorrow I'm going to a fly-in lunch because of it. Otherwise, I'm mostly on this board. I used to be on Student Pilot more, and I have a log in to the Purple Board, but I'm almost 100% POA all the way!!!
 
So I drive all the way to the Petaluma airport today (about 45 min - 1 hour each way) . . .

And instead of 3pm the flour bombing / spot landings / etc - started this morning!!!

Darn, darn, darn. They changed things at the last minute and my airport contact didn't think I'd show up anyways so he did not think he should call me.

He says I missed a whole day of fun, flying, food, the works. Gosh darn it. He even said there were young cute guys there.

The place was IFR (almost) by the time I got there and everyone had gone home.

Grumble.

Oh well - the CPA texted last night from a concert and we're talking on Monday (phone), possibly meeting Tuesday.

I think I'm going to quit eHarmony. I don't have energy like I used to and like a poster on here said, some real life opportunities may be my best bet. My membership will go through mid month next month, and what I can do is simply email any matches I'm interested in before then.


So to recap:

(meetings only)

Bachelor # 1 - Met on Friday last week, seeing again one week later (tomorrow)

Bachelor # 2 - Met on Saturday last week, friends now, flew with him, have seen him 3 times

(Bachelor # 3 phone only never met)

Bachelor # 4 - Scientist, met on Monday last week and yesterday, no longer speaking to him, not a match

Bachelor # 5 - Vet (animals), meeting for the first time tonight


(Bachelor #6 CPA is texting and I haven't met yet)
 
dell30rb said:
San fran is the gayest city in america. According to dave chappelle.. I've never been
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As if dating wasn't hard enough, throwing yourself into a veritable hetero dead zone has to have it's challenges.. :rofl:
 
Aaaaaaaaaaaarrrrggghhh.

The vet was slightly different than his photos. He also said he is religious and goes to church every week, prays, says grace before meals . . .

And . . .

( 1 ) Will NOT live with a woman before getting married, no matter how high the rents and how long the distance

( 2 ) Willl NOT get "friendly" with a woman before marriage. This is a sin.

( 3 ) Wants a woman who is a protestant and will discuss religion.


Why don't men mention this BEFORE meeting?

Could have saved us both a lot of time.


Back to the drawing board. Tomorrow I do have a second date with Bachelor #1, perhaps he will be awesome.
 
kimberlyanne546 said:
Aaaaaaaaaaaarrrrggghhh.
...snip...

( 1 ) Will NOT live with a woman before getting married, no matter how high the rents and how long the distance

( 2 ) Willl NOT get "friendly" with a woman before marriage. This is a sin.

( 3 ) Wants a woman who is a protestant and will discuss religion.


Why don't men mention this BEFORE meeting?

Could have saved us both a lot of time....snip....
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Because if he did all this, he wouldn't of had the privilege of meeting nice people like Kimberlyanne. His loss.
Don't work so hard at it. Find someone you can hang around with. The other stuff will come later. Or maybe not. Trust me, living alone ain't so bad. She has her place (and 5 cats); I have mine (and two large dogs).
 
kimberlyanne546 said:
( 1 ) Will NOT live with a woman before getting married, no matter how high the rents and how long the distance

( 2 ) Willl NOT get "friendly" with a woman before marriage. This is a sin.
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Are those actually considered negatives?
 
kimberlyanne546 said:
Aaaaaaaaaaaarrrrggghhh.


( 1 ) Will NOT live with a woman before getting married, no matter how high the rents and how long the distance

( 2 ) Willl NOT get "friendly" with a woman before marriage. This is a sin.
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Uhhh, not for nothing, but these two are on page 1 of the manual....

I smell a rat here....
 
woodstock said:
I think the rigidity is more the negative than anything... it smacks of control freak, and life has to be "just this way" with no deviation.
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So moral standards for life and relationships are controlling? Seems to me if Kim (Kim, can we call you Kim?) is looking for a moral man that would not cheat and be a loyal husband this man should be given a chance.

Oh I get it, its the religion thing. Yep, that is a deal killer. :mad2:

I though Kim was looking for a serious relationship?
 
woodstock said:
I think the rigidity is more the negative than anything... it smacks of control freak, and life has to be "just this way" with no deviation.
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Morality is a terrible thing. :rolleyes:

I can't go more further without risking SZ
 
Geico266 said:
So moral standards for life and relationships are controlling? Seems to me if Kim (Kim, can we call you Kim?) is looking for a moral man that would not cheat and be a loyal husband this man should be given a chance.

Oh I get it, its the religion thing. Yep, that is a deal killer. :mad2:

I though Kim was looking for a serious relationship?
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How can you possibly have a serious relationship with someone you don't even share fundamental ideals? Would you want to be in a relationship where you think your partner is an idiot? If you're just looking to get laid, it doesn't matter, if you want a relationship, that's when it starts to matter.
 
Bob Noel said:
Are those actually considered negatives?
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Yes, but more to the point, shouldn't those questions have been asked as part of the matching process? Also the question about religion.
 
Bob Noel said:
Morality is a terrible thing. :rolleyes:

I can't go more further without risking SZ
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Where does "morality" become obsequious though? Everybody's is weird, trick is to find somebody whose weird you can tolerate.
 
Geico266 said:
So moral standards for life and relationships are controlling? Seems to me if Kim (Kim, can we call you Kim?) is looking for a moral man that would not cheat and be a loyal husband this man should be given a chance.

Oh I get it, its the religion thing. Yep, that is a deal killer. :mad2:

I though Kim was looking for a serious relationship?
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Both of you are taking an extreme position, which isn't surprising.

It is about degrees of morality, and this guy clearly has it cranked up to ten. Do you think someone who has it cranked up to ten is going to keep that self-imposed? No judgment on their partner? What if they are dating someone who falls into the middle range, which is "life happens". Said person had a few relationships over the years which turned serious, and they <gasp> had sex outside of marriage. What are the chances of lifelong happiness? Note I said happiness, not "marriage", etc. I'm sure you can stay married your whole life with someone who is that far from your range.

Having dated a few guys who had serious hangups about sex and marriage, I can tell you for a fact it's a huge screaming red flag for control freak in many if not most aspects of life. To the extent that those experiences certainly changed my own views on marriage. If you aren't careful you can really be saddled with a freak - and that would just bring misery.
 
It's not that his stance is necessarily bad, just that his unilateral decision about something she should have equal say in is not conducive for a mature, healthy and respectful relationship. It takes two to tango.

His default position is an honorable one, IF phrased as, "This is my ideal, what are your views on the matter?".

What if on the first date a girl told you she wanted 6 kids and was going to have them no matter what?

Relationships are tricky things. Mutual understanding and respect are good foundations. Walking into it and "laying down the law" does not indicate any desire to understand, respect or compromise at all.

All that said, I married a very religious girl. I am not religious. But she was willing to look past that in pursuit of a healthy relationship. 14 years of marriage and 2 kids later I couldn't be happier.
 
Morne said:
What if on the first date a girl told you she wanted 6 kids and was going to have them no matter what?
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I would RUN. That "no matter what" sounds like a dirty trick waiting to happen. "Oops forgot to take the pill. Didn't I tell you?" or pokin holes....
 
ajstoner21 said:
I would RUN. That "no matter what" sounds like a dirty trick waiting to happen. "Oops forgot to take the pill. Didn't I tell you?" or pokin holes....
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EXACTLY. It's not that having 6 kids is bad, just that she is making decisions without your input. Same, same for Kimberly.
 
Everskyward said:
Yes, but more to the point, shouldn't those questions have been asked as part of the matching process? Also the question about religion.
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I agree 100%.... If someone is paying a service to provide a matching option their initial questionaire and form SHOULD be worded to really match similar styles of people. My guess is they bait you in on the pretense of that ability and once they have run your credit card and have your money you get fed all the hits in your area regardless of compatability. and it is next to impossible to prove they didn't..... IMHO.
 
Thank you all for your inputs. This is a very interesting aspect of matching.

To give you further information:

* Many but not all first dates end with a short kiss goodnight. At the end of last night's first date with the vet, I was walked to my car. I offered to drive him to his car. So the "end" of our date was him getting out of my car. He sort of reaches over with one arm and says something about breaking his "stay three feet away" first date rule by giving me a hug. It was barely a back pat - our bodies didn't even touch.

Another thing:

He was very picky when ordering (just a beer and later coffee, but he told me he was picky and listed all the things he didn't like, from mayo to seafood).

He said he liked to people watch and watched this couple making out, telling me not to look. He did this all night, saying how entertaining they were, how they acted like there was nobody else in the room but each other. He also watched the football game a little, but he'd told me that he would in advance and I was OK with that.

He found out I was going in a plane today - an expiremental - and showed me with his hands how unstable the taxi would be. I then asked if he'd go up in a 152, he acted like perhaps not. I asked about a 172 and he said they are a little better and more stable but that he'd been in one through a storm as a kid. He goes to osh kosh every year and knows a lot about planes. He was raised with rides in all kinds of planes including twins - so he doesn't like the tiny unstable aircraft.

I'm still going to go in that plane today and fly to meet other pilots for lunch - weather permitting, but I'm just trying to make a point.

I need someone a little more laid back. I would most likely live with someone before I got married, to see what it is like to live with them. Not a deal breaker if they didn't want to do this, though. It just usually ends up saving more than a thousand dollars a month, which can be put towards the relationship - going on trips, paying off debt, etc.
 
Man, I "met" my wife on the internet and it was soo much simpler..

"ok, I gotta go play hide and seek with my little brother and sister, you can come play if you want."

"sounds fun, where do you live?"

12 years later, she's the mother to my twins and still my best friend.
 
Oh and I asked him why he had not brought all this up. I asked him if he would date a girl who NEVER went to church, would only go "to make him happy" and not for herself, would not really know if she believes in God or how to interpret the Bible, etc.

His way of sort of answering the question was that in the beginning he'd date almost anyone but he was a "traditional guy" and that stuff would need to become a daily part of a long term, serious relationship or he would not let the relationship continue.

Also, he said he checked a box that said "Christian" and that he would only date girls who matched that criteria. I told him I was Catholic . . . and that I wished he'd put more religious stuff in his profile instead of talking about animals. If this stuff is that important to him he should scream it from the mountaintops in my opinion. What good does it do to meet me in a bar, have a beer, and then drop all this heavy stuff???

Misled in Mill Valley,

Kimberly (Yes Kim is fine)
 
BellyUpFish said:
Man, I "met" my wife on the internet and it was soo much simpler..

"ok, I gotta go play hide and seek with my little brother and sister, you can come play if you want."

"sounds fun, where do you live?"

12 years later, she's the mother to my twins and still my best friend.
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Hide and seek?

How old are you?

If I was at the age of playing hide and seek, I wouldn't get friendly either!

But I'm 32 now, and this is 2011.
 
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