SixPapaCharlie
May the force be with you
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2013
- Messages
- 16,018
- Display Name
Display name:
Sixer
Sorry, I had tummy issues. What did I miss?
So today was a crap day. I planned to go to the airport and knock out this genius instructional video but I was sort of tired from the audits at work and I forgot to eat dinner.
Maybe flying will make me feel better.
I thought I will fly to this little uncontrolled field so people aren't looking at me like I am a dumbs**t while I film myself.
Get out there start it up (for the first time in a hundred hours I didn't do a big walk around after my preflight)
Start to taxi and FOOOMP! this traffic cone goes flying down the ramp.
There goes the whole "so people aren't looking at me like I am a dumbs**t" thing
It goes maybe 30 yards right through into window of a 182. And I mean it shatters it.
I kept thinking this day can't get any worse. That is when I realize that there is someone in the 182. A man and a little Labrador puppy either just landed or were about to go for a flight. Either way I'm like in a panic.
I shut everything down and walk over to the guy and he is bleeding from his temple.
He is screaming and yelling about lawyers and crap. I tell him I have a first aid deal in my plane and I am going to get it.
I don't know what I was thinking. I just fired it up and taxied. I guess nobody really realized what had happened because I made my call to the tower and they were all "36 Via Bravo and Alpha"
I took off and flew for awhile feeling terrible and light headed. Then it started to set in what I had done. I couldn't believe I would even have made the decision to fly on an empty stomach. Bypassed the IM SAFE thing completely.
I had the auto pilot on because I was flustered and tried to collect myself. I really wanted to film my video on being your own safety pilot. I put on the foggles and went through the whole thing and it was really good stuff. I never felt unsafe because the auto pilot was on and I could see traffic on the avedyne. Then it dawned on me how stupid I was. Instead of hitting record, I hit the power button and didn't film any of it. UGH!!!! Whatever just go somewhere I said.
This is when I looked down and noticed that the auto pilot wasn't engaged. I NEVER TURNED IT ON!!!
I had probably drifted easily 2 to 3 miles off course by now and really had no way of determining where I was. I had a flight bag with sectionals, E6bs, protractors but nobody knows how to use that crap.
I grabbed the FAR AIM to see if it had any location references in it. Let's be honest, I maybe read half a page before I just decided it wasn't worth it.
Now I am hungry, I am lost, Probably a murderer. I am sure there is a little dog licking the cold dead face of his pilot on the ramp.
I decide the journey has to stop.
I decide to head to an airport where I used to go for BBQ and call the authorities and let them know what happened.
I manage to get there and land. The BBQ lady is picking up a couple that flew in and she looks at me and says "I got room for one more"
Well... It is good BBQ. I go. The brisket was awesome. Funny how a little food in your belly changes everything.
I decided since I am going to lose my license, I better go home and deal with everything there since I am now a 4 hour drive from home.
I fly back to Denton and I can still see the 182 with the cone still in the windshield.
The man is there and he is talking to 3 people. One has a badge. He starts pointing at me.
I know I am screwed so I taxi over. I am taxiing and all of the sudden FOOMP!! A little Labrador puppy goes flying like 30 yards down the ramp and right into the windshield of a King Air.
There were pieces of that little puppy everywhere.
Sure enough, a guy comes climbing out of the king air with a rare, albino, Jamaican seeing-eye deer.
His forehead is bleeding. He starts screaming. I said "Hold on, I have a deal in my plane with bandages."
So here I am... Circling over north Dallas. I have a few hours of fuel remaining and nowhere to go.
It is starting to get dark though and I am once again getting hungry. Not in a Robert Lomax kind of way either.
This really sucks. And I know when I land, that deer is going flying into the windshield of a 737.
What a really bad day this has been.
And I still have a huge mess to deal with once I land. I can't even imagine how you clean puppy guts off a propeller.
Anywho....
My video turned out sh**ty because some of that^ is true.
And I really want to play the 2 lies and a truth game so I just whipped this up in hopes of satisfying something more substantial for 10k then just working the word dildo into a post.
So today was a crap day. I planned to go to the airport and knock out this genius instructional video but I was sort of tired from the audits at work and I forgot to eat dinner.
Maybe flying will make me feel better.
I thought I will fly to this little uncontrolled field so people aren't looking at me like I am a dumbs**t while I film myself.
Get out there start it up (for the first time in a hundred hours I didn't do a big walk around after my preflight)
Start to taxi and FOOOMP! this traffic cone goes flying down the ramp.
There goes the whole "so people aren't looking at me like I am a dumbs**t" thing
It goes maybe 30 yards right through into window of a 182. And I mean it shatters it.
I kept thinking this day can't get any worse. That is when I realize that there is someone in the 182. A man and a little Labrador puppy either just landed or were about to go for a flight. Either way I'm like in a panic.
I shut everything down and walk over to the guy and he is bleeding from his temple.
He is screaming and yelling about lawyers and crap. I tell him I have a first aid deal in my plane and I am going to get it.
I don't know what I was thinking. I just fired it up and taxied. I guess nobody really realized what had happened because I made my call to the tower and they were all "36 Via Bravo and Alpha"
I took off and flew for awhile feeling terrible and light headed. Then it started to set in what I had done. I couldn't believe I would even have made the decision to fly on an empty stomach. Bypassed the IM SAFE thing completely.
I had the auto pilot on because I was flustered and tried to collect myself. I really wanted to film my video on being your own safety pilot. I put on the foggles and went through the whole thing and it was really good stuff. I never felt unsafe because the auto pilot was on and I could see traffic on the avedyne. Then it dawned on me how stupid I was. Instead of hitting record, I hit the power button and didn't film any of it. UGH!!!! Whatever just go somewhere I said.
This is when I looked down and noticed that the auto pilot wasn't engaged. I NEVER TURNED IT ON!!!
I had probably drifted easily 2 to 3 miles off course by now and really had no way of determining where I was. I had a flight bag with sectionals, E6bs, protractors but nobody knows how to use that crap.
I grabbed the FAR AIM to see if it had any location references in it. Let's be honest, I maybe read half a page before I just decided it wasn't worth it.
Now I am hungry, I am lost, Probably a murderer. I am sure there is a little dog licking the cold dead face of his pilot on the ramp.
I decide the journey has to stop.
I decide to head to an airport where I used to go for BBQ and call the authorities and let them know what happened.
I manage to get there and land. The BBQ lady is picking up a couple that flew in and she looks at me and says "I got room for one more"
Well... It is good BBQ. I go. The brisket was awesome. Funny how a little food in your belly changes everything.
I decided since I am going to lose my license, I better go home and deal with everything there since I am now a 4 hour drive from home.
I fly back to Denton and I can still see the 182 with the cone still in the windshield.
The man is there and he is talking to 3 people. One has a badge. He starts pointing at me.
I know I am screwed so I taxi over. I am taxiing and all of the sudden FOOMP!! A little Labrador puppy goes flying like 30 yards down the ramp and right into the windshield of a King Air.
There were pieces of that little puppy everywhere.
Sure enough, a guy comes climbing out of the king air with a rare, albino, Jamaican seeing-eye deer.
His forehead is bleeding. He starts screaming. I said "Hold on, I have a deal in my plane with bandages."
So here I am... Circling over north Dallas. I have a few hours of fuel remaining and nowhere to go.
It is starting to get dark though and I am once again getting hungry. Not in a Robert Lomax kind of way either.
This really sucks. And I know when I land, that deer is going flying into the windshield of a 737.
What a really bad day this has been.
And I still have a huge mess to deal with once I land. I can't even imagine how you clean puppy guts off a propeller.
Anywho....
My video turned out sh**ty because some of that^ is true.
And I really want to play the 2 lies and a truth game so I just whipped this up in hopes of satisfying something more substantial for 10k then just working the word dildo into a post.
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