People say the dumbest stuff

I heard a comedian say this in reference to "kids say the darndest things." which sort of applies to the above:

"You would too if you had no education."
 
Timbeck2 said:
I heard a comedian say this in reference to "kids say the darndest things." which sort of applies to the above:

"You would too if you had no education."
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Apparently you missed the thread where it was determined by many PoA members that an education is not required, nor useful, for pilots. ;)
 
"Sir, why are you stopped on the side of the freeway? This is a very dangerous place."

"yes officer, I know. But I was speeding at 15 miles an hour over the limit when I threw my cigarette out the window. The wind was so bad from the window being down that I spilled this beer all over my lap in the process."

"Sir, is that why you stopped, to clean yourself up?"

"No officer, I knew you would be along shortly to help, as this is one of your regular speed traps."

"Step out of the car, Sir."
 
I remember being in the SYR area a while back (10-15 years ago), and I think we were on with Center. Anyway, this Cessna calls up for flight following, gets radar identified and gives their destination. Then this exchange.

Center: Cessna xxx, what's your heading?
Cessna: One-two-zero
Center: That's not going to get you there.
Cessna: How about One-eight-zero?
Center: Well, that's closer...

It went on like this for another 5 minutes or so. Me and my passenger laughed about this for the next few days and we still occasionally bring it up again for a good laugh.

The other one I remember was en-route over the Dakotas or somewhere like that. There was a Bonanza transmitting on a different frequency so we could only hear the controller's half of the conversation. It became clear after a while that the Bonanza really wanted higher badly, but there was traffic in front of him that prevented it. Several times, the controller patiently explained to the Bonanza that he couldn't have higher for another so-many miles.

At some point the Controller had had enough and said "It's going to be a long summer with guys like you around."

For the next 15 minutes or so we heard (mostly airline) pilots on frequency apologizing to the controller for the jerk in the Bonanza.
 
Turbo-Arrow-Driver said:
Center: That's not going to get you there.
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I hear this kind of thing surprisingly often where the controller is completely flabbergasted at the pilot's flight following destination request given their present heading
 
Turbo-Arrow-Driver said:
I remember being in the SYR area a while back (10-15 years ago), and I think we were on with Center. Anyway, this Cessna calls up for flight following, gets radar identified and gives their destination. Then this exchange.

Center: Cessna xxx, what's your heading?
Cessna: One-two-zero
Center: That's not going to get you there.
Click to expand...

That's because I'm heading to LA via Omaha.
 
Cap'n Jack said:
According to several airline flights I've had lately, that might be an acceptable transfer.
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Nah, got one better. Government contracts be damned....flight from Tokyo to Honolulu via......Seattle. :dunno:

Not kidding either, that was how our routing went last month thanks to our gov’t travel agency. :mad2: :mad3: :incazzato:

Brian
 
Tantalum said:
I hear this kind of thing surprisingly often where the controller is completely flabbergasted at the pilot's flight following destination request given their present heading
Click to expand...

I remember being somewhere in the area of Pueblo, CO and Denver center asked for my intended route of flight. They were a bit confused... until it became clear that when I picked up FF they mis-heard my destination as "Tulsa" rather than "Tucson." :)
 
While we're at it, why do people feel the need to have personal conversations on guard? Here it all the time, especially when I'm over or near western Virginia and West Virginia....:rolleyes:

Brian
 
Doug Reid said:
Tower at KCRE : “ Cessna 1234, this is the fourth touch and go you have done at this Class D airport without permission..when you land at your home airport, give me a phone call !” Cessna 1234: “ I don’t have your num-bah !”
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This is hilarious! I can’t imagine hearing that live. I wouldn’t be able to control the plane
 
Bugsmasher 123: "Buffalo Approach, Bugsmasher 123, level 7,000 10 miles west of the ABC VOR."
Approach: "Bugsmasher 123, I show you 10 miles EAST of the ABC VOR."
Bugsmasher 123: "That's pretty close for me."
 
Doug Reid said:
Tower at KCRE : “ Cessna 1234, this is the fourth touch and go you have done at this Class D airport without permission..when you land at your home airport, give me a phone call !” Cessna 1234: “ I don’t have your num-bah !”
Click to expand...

Hmm. Why did the Tower wait so long to say something. Betcha they had a pool going on how many he would do. The guy working Local had 4 and secured his win
 
My favorite one was a skycrasher on a long, long upwind, turning cross-wind in the pattern at a local class "D", "Tower, I don't see that guy you cleared for takeoff behind us." Tower, "Thats because he's already departed the area, no factor."
 
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