Lets make Friday 'Joke Day'!

[Matthew]

We just bought a 2020 Edge from my FIL…it has a “courtesy wipe” setting. Anybody been brave enough to figure out what that is?

The old Focus was the first car I had with this, must be a Ford thing.

I thought it was the coolest thing ever and used to tell my wife, “Watch this!” Then I’d spray washer fluid and the wipers would give the normal swipes, then pause a few seconds until that one last dribble would start to run down from the top of the windshield and give it one last swipe. Then I’d say, “Did you see that? Did you? Did you miss it? Should I do it again?” Apparently not everyone is as technologically impressed as I am.

 

[Capngrog]

What's a FIL?

 

[Baked Potato]

What's a FIL?

The other person that your wife calls "daddy".

 

[Justin M]

We just bought a 2020 Edge from my FIL…it has a “courtesy wipe” setting. Anybody been brave enough to figure out what that is?

I really thought this question was about something else entirely.

 

[MauleSkinner]

I really thought this question was about something else entirely.

View attachment 122611

Me, too.

 

[R.L.Mauzy]

 

[ArrowFlyer86]

 

[Daleandee]

Easy to tell that it ain't Friday ...

 

[Matthew]

 

[Daleandee]

Cessna 172 (crashed) - aviation - by owner - airplane aviation parts - craigslist

Weird lookin Cessna crashed in my yard bouta month ago. Feds are all over me and I just wanna get rid of this junkbox. Willing to lower the price and pay for shipping if needed.

charleston.craigslist.org

 

[Albany Tom]

That guy has nothing to complain about, compared to this:

The atomic bomb that faded into South Carolina history

Sixty years ago, on March 11, 1958, an Air Force bomber dropped a nuclear weapon on a farm in the rural Mars Bluff community outside Florence. The radioactive payload either wasn’t loaded in the warhead or didn’t detonate — the stories differ.

www.armytimes.com

How we didn't accidentally blow up part of the world in the 50's is beyond me.

 

[GaryM]

That guy has nothing to complain about, compared to this:

The atomic bomb that faded into South Carolina history

Sixty years ago, on March 11, 1958, an Air Force bomber dropped a nuclear weapon on a farm in the rural Mars Bluff community outside Florence. The radioactive payload either wasn’t loaded in the warhead or didn’t detonate — the stories differ.

www.armytimes.com

How we didn't accidentally blow up part of the world in the 50's is beyond me.

And then there are these three:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BOMARC_missile_accident_site. New Jersey

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1966_Palomares_B-52_crash. Spain

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1968_Thule_Air_Base_B-52_crash. Greenland

All dispersed weapons-grade fissionable material, from the Bomarc in a pad fire, from the other two when the conventional explosives detonated in the H bombs the B-52s had been carrying

 

[2-Bit Speed]

 

[bflynn]

That guy has nothing to complain about, compared to this:

The atomic bomb that faded into South Carolina history

Sixty years ago, on March 11, 1958, an Air Force bomber dropped a nuclear weapon on a farm in the rural Mars Bluff community outside Florence. The radioactive payload either wasn’t loaded in the warhead or didn’t detonate — the stories differ.

www.armytimes.com

How we didn't accidentally blow up part of the world in the 50's is beyond me.

Surprisingly, atomic bombs are difficult to detonate. If they aren't armed at most you might get a small conventional explosion with the dirty fallout from the material inside. You have to detonate all the explosive charges in the globe at exactly the same time to trigger the implosion that creates atomic detonation.

It reminds me of a few threads here.

 

[Capt. Geoffrey Thorpe]

 

[Charlie Golf]

 

[Matthew]

 

[2-Bit Speed]

View attachment 122659

There needs to be a screaming in pain emojie or a vomit emojie... Can we get a vomit emojie? For reactions...

 

[Palmpilot]

View attachment 122649

I think I just lost my appetite.

 

[Lycosaurus]

 

[Lycosaurus]

I was thinking of you guys ...

 

[Lycosaurus]

 

[Matthew]

I think I just lost my appetite.

I went to Scotland a few times for business. While I was there, I asked, "OK, so what exactly IS haggis?" The guy I was working with explained, then said, "It's really not that bad." I said, "I'm not sure which is worse: what you just described or that you said, "it's really not that bad"."

 

[Dana]

I always thought of haggis as kind of like Scottish chitlins.

 

[Let'sgoflying!]

I had no problem with haggis.
Now, this was after the 2nd shot of Glenfiddich they plied us with.

 

[Bill]

I had no problem with haggis.
Now, this was after the 2nd shot of Glenfiddich they plied us with.

Only two? I’d need more than that to eat that ****.

 

[Tspin]

I had no problem with haggis.
Now, this was after the 2nd shot of Glenfiddich they plied us with.

Was each ‘shot’ a full bottle?

 

[Charlie Golf]

 

[flyingron]

View attachment 121642

A while back I was making my Colonoscopy appointment. The were giving me directions to their facility and told me that the parking lot was behind the building and there was a door there that led to the facility.

I'm transcribing the directions and say "Colonoscopy, enter in rear."

They told me they'd heard that before.

 

[Lycosaurus]

 

[ArrowFlyer86]

 

[ArrowFlyer86]

....Half the newbies showing up on their first thread being like...

 

[ArrowFlyer86]

 

[ArrowFlyer86]

 

[JOhnH]

....Half the newbies showing up on their first thread being like...
View attachment 122713

Nah, he's at the right place.

 

[Lycosaurus]

 

[Lycosaurus]

 

[Flyxaos]

I heard some people talking about me saying that I was self centered.

That is enough about them.

 

[Lycosaurus]

 

[Lycosaurus]