getting hitched!!

C

cirrusmx

Line Up and Wait
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Dec 20, 2011
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Boston, Massachussetts
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campoalavista
I have enough dough for a 182 or similar, however I am getting hitched in June. So bye bye airplane ownership, for at least the next few years!!!:rofl::rofl:

I told her I rather have a plane and one less kid. She said "How come you rather have a machine rather than give life to a heart beating human? Well I did my numbers and a spam can costs about the same per month than a child.:D:D

Anyways, no one will ever understand pilots other than pilots themselves.I will need to learn to juggle between family and aviation.
 
cirrusmx said:
I have enough dough for a 182 or similar, however I am getting hitched in June. So bye bye airplane ownership, for at least the next few years!!!:rofl::rofl:

I told her I rather have a plane and one less kid. She said "How come you rather have a machine rather than give life to a heart beating human? Well I did my numbers and a spam can costs about the same per month than a child.:D:D

Anyways, no one will ever understand pilots other than pilots themselves.I will need to learn to juggle between family and aviation.
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Why don't you do both? I'm sure if you have the money to get a 182, you could probably afford a 12K Aeronca Chief - and I'd bet you'd have some good times with her in it, too!

http://sanantonio.craigslist.org/mcy/3474554751.html

Ryan
 
I was thinking the same thing. Get the stankiest old hand-prop Luscombe or Taylorcraft you can find and keep it at a grass field. Come home every Sat with gas smell and dirty fingernails. Break the new bride in right. Even if you never fly it, just go out there every week and taxi up and down the turf strip. lol
 
cirrusmx said:
I have enough dough for a 182 or similar, however I am getting hitched in June. So bye bye airplane ownership, for at least the next few years!!!:rofl::rofl:

I told her I rather have a plane and one less kid. She said "How come you rather have a machine rather than give life to a heart beating human? Well I did my numbers and a spam can costs about the same per month than a child.:D:D

Anyways, no one will ever understand pilots other than pilots themselves.I will need to learn to juggle between family and aviation.
Click to expand...

No. An airplane is far cheaper.
 
cirrusmx said:
I have enough dough for a 182 or similar, however I am getting hitched in June. So bye bye airplane ownership, for at least the next few years!!!:rofl::rofl:

I told her I rather have a plane and one less kid. She said "How come you rather have a machine rather than give life to a heart beating human? Well I did my numbers and a spam can costs about the same per month than a child.:D:D

Anyways, no one will ever understand pilots other than pilots themselves.I will need to learn to juggle between family and aviation.
Click to expand...

You must understand that having children is at least as vital an imperative to her as flying is to you. But she'll get over it after sitting up all night with the second one drooling all over her.
 
Go into this thing with your eyes open, she's telling you in girl talk you won't be flying for the next 25-30 years. Are you listening?
 
AuntPeggy said:
You must understand that having children is at least as vital an imperative to her as flying is to you. But she'll get over it after sitting up all night with the second one drooling all over her.
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If drool is as far as it goes....

Most of us have to deal with a gastrointestinal virus at one point or another. And the real little ones catch EVERYTHING particularly if they are in daycare (if not, it's when school starts).
 
I'm having a kid in May. I'm not selling my airplane. I don't know what is it with some of you guys but the premise of having a family doesn't preclude me from being an individual. I also objectively disagree with the premise expenditures for a 0-1 year old equate to that of feeding and maintaining a C-182 to the tune of 150hrs a year. NOT EVEN CLOSE. But hey it's your life. good luck with that whole mutually exclusive life philosophy.

EDIT: To add, didn't mean to be snarky campo, I just don't agree with the idea that having personal passions and raising a family are mutually exclusive as a generality. Most often men have most of these financial pressures imposed on by the female partner. Meaning, it's not that family is mutually exclusive from having personal interests, but that the female's judgement as to what constitutes the "proper" and "necessary" scale of those spenditures creates a dynamic of mutual exclusivity. That added to a post-modern beta male predisposition to appeasing female material wants and presto, here comes sell the plane because of a kid. I am grateful and lucky that my wife is frugal and supportive of my flying, which we make a family activity.
 
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hindsight2020 said:
I'm having a kid in May. I'm not selling my airplane. I don't know what is it with some of you guys but the premise of having a family doesn't preclude me from being an individual. I also objectively disagree with the premise expenditures for a 0-1 year old equate to that of feeding and maintaining a C-182 to the tune of 150hrs a year. NOT EVEN CLOSE. But hey it's your life. good luck with that whole mutually exclusive life philosophy.
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First kid?
 
I voluntarily gave up planes and motorcycles for about 14 years. No pressure from the little woman. We did have a motorhome and a nice boat for all of us, but I thought that a 2 seat plane, or a MC wasn't in the 'family' cards myself.

When I got back into flying after my kids finances were all taken care of, and the future was secure, it was very sweet. I guess you could say I missed it for 14 years, but I filled that time with kids and wife stuff, and wouldn't ever trade it for 14 years of flying by myself, or with the family.
 
hindsight2020 said:
First kid. Second marriage. I may not have all the answers to life but at least I'm not a beta male. ;)
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Hey, whatever works for you and the wife. Just don't become too alpha. You wouldn't want to be demoted from alpha to master beta.

-Rich
 
cirrusmx said:
I have enough dough for a 182 or similar, however I am getting hitched in June. So bye bye airplane ownership, for at least the next few years!!!:rofl::rofl:

I told her I rather have a plane and one less kid. She said "How come you rather have a machine rather than give life to a heart beating human? Well I did my numbers and a spam can costs about the same per month than a child.:D:D

Anyways, no one will ever understand pilots other than pilots themselves.I will need to learn to juggle between family and aviation.
Click to expand...

I am sorry, I cannot tell you how disappointed I am in to hear you say that.

It looks like the only thing you did was retreat and turn in your manhood. Will you need to check them back from her every friday when you want to go play foot ball on weekends with your buds? or is that allowed in your new life?

You might as well face it, now that you set that president it will be the same thing over and over again on every topic that you and she disagree on from hear on out until she divorces you. And she will sooner or later divorce you as women want men not boys who cannot and do not follow their dreams.

If she were a cello player and it cost a lot of money would you expect her to give that up for you/kids? No. So why do so many misguided boys cave?

Life sucks if you let it. I think you just made a huge mistake you will spend the rest of your life following suit.

If she wants to be your partner then let her choose the next big item. You get the plane she can get the house. That simple. You only need a 1000' 2 br house anyway why waste any more money than that on a house?

I will never understand why and how so many boys are taught to give up there balls when they get a girl friend or get married????
 
Wow, tell us how you really feel Tony.
 
hindsight2020 said:
I'm having a kid in May. I'm not selling my airplane. I don't know what is it with some of you guys but the premise of having a family doesn't preclude me from being an individual. I also objectively disagree with the premise expenditures for a 0-1 year old equate to that of feeding and maintaining a C-182 to the tune of 150hrs a year. NOT EVEN CLOSE. But hey it's your life. good luck with that whole mutually exclusive life philosophy.

EDIT: To add, didn't mean to be snarky campo, I just don't agree with the idea that having personal passions and raising a family are mutually exclusive as a generality. Most often men have most of these financial pressures imposed on by the female partner. Meaning, it's not that family is mutually exclusive from having personal interests, but that the female's judgement as to what constitutes the "proper" and "necessary" scale of those spenditures creates a dynamic of mutual exclusivity. That added to a post-modern beta male predisposition to appeasing female material wants and presto, here comes sell the plane because of a kid. I am grateful and lucky that my wife is frugal and supportive of my flying, which we make a family activity.
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Exactly, good for You. You no doubt started your relationship on the healthy premise that your wants, desires and needs are equal to hers and that you both needed to pick which priorities are important to you both or to both of you individually if necessary.
 
I hope this doesn't end up in the "Stupidest thing I did and lived to tell about it" thread

JK...congrats!!!!
 
I went through a divorce. Trust me, you're much better off with the plane.
 
Congrats on the marriage however I have to tell you NO WAY IS A PLANE AS EXPENSIVE AS A KID. Don't get me wrong having a child is perhaps the greatest thing in my life. However every year the are more and more expensive. Once you have kids Adios disposable income. Get the plane.
 
If you want a plane, it's a good idea to have it in place prior to the ceremony. Part of the deal is that you both get to do the things you want to do. Getting married shouldn't be the "now I no longer get to do what I like to do" event in your life.

I'm not real comfortable with the indications you have already received, but to each his own.
 
I'm here to warn you from experience that if she's already telling what you can't have then it's only going to get worse.

Find yourself a nice girl that shares your passion for flying and you'll have a much happier life and marriage.

You can thank me later for this life-saving advice I just gave you.

If you don't follow my advice and you marry this girl and end up getting divorced she's going to take half your money and you'll never be able to afford a plane.
 
Run an ad on match.com

SWM seeks SWF. Prefer a pilot, also prefer with plane. Send photos (of the plane).
 
I would never marry a women that makes me choose her or the aircraft. If she gets her way on this, it will be like opening the gate for the herd. Once the herd starts thru you can never close the gate.

Simply be honest with her, tell her you are getting the aircraft, If she can't handle that, she really doesn't love you and want to to be happy anyway.

We have been married 45 years, it is a give and take proposition but neither can dictate to the other.

Unless you really want to be the subservient husband the rest of your life.
 
I have to say that marriage is NOT as bad as some of the folks here seem think. I got married this year and LOVE it. Oh, and the wife and I bought the Taylorcraft three months AFTER the wedding... so it isn't all bad. She's not wild about flying, but she married a CFI, and knew what she was getting.

Ryan
 
RyanShort1 said:
I have to say that marriage is NOT as bad as some of the folks here seem think. I got married this year and LOVE it. Oh, and the wife and I bought the Taylorcraft three months AFTER the wedding... so it isn't all bad. She's not wild about flying, but she married a CFI, and knew what she was getting.

Ryan
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Of all the roles I play in my life I love being a family man, father and grand father the best.

I am not badmouthing women nor marriage only the terms at which some enter it.

His post is clear he is an aviator, loves flying, saving for a plane and she not only let him give that up but seems to be arguing why he must. Marriage although rare can be wonderful and balanced with both people continue to be individuals and a really great couple. They must have the first to have the second. I just read disaster in the ops post.
 
flav8r said:
I'm here to warn you from experience that if she's already telling what you can't have then it's only going to get worse.
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Truer words have never been spoken. Think about the worst fight you have had while dating. Think of it about two notches worse and that will pretty much be your marriage. Not saying it will always be like that but you will see that level more often than you want.
 
I still think the grungy ancient TW plane on a grass strip is the best answer. It should need a lot of maintenance, and sputter like an old wife when run.

"Honey -- I'm headed down to the hanger for a while. Don't wait up - love ya, mean it. Oh, can you fix the rib roast tonight, I'll be real hungry when I get back. Hamper's full. Buh-bye."
 
cirrusmx said:
I have enough dough for a 182 or similar, however I am getting hitched in June. So bye bye airplane ownership, for at least the next few years!!!:rofl::rofl:

I told her I rather have a plane and one less kid. She said "How come you rather have a machine rather than give life to a heart beating human? Well I did my numbers and a spam can costs about the same per month than a child.:D:D

Anyways, no one will ever understand pilots other than pilots themselves.I will need to learn to juggle between family and aviation.
Click to expand...

Don't be ridiculous. In my experience airplanes are a hell of a lot more expensive than children until college. Unless you are paying mother's *erp* um, child support of course.

Not that I don't agree with your choice ;)
 
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My wife talked me into getting back into aviation, and buying into a co-ownership. So I certainly have no complaints here! ;)
 
During threads on this subject I'm reminded of the adage that men get married thinking their wives won't change. Women get married thinking that their husbands will. Those who set about to make it happen, especially in areas that guys don't want to change, can be difficult to stomach over the long term.

A good friend left his plss-ant data processing job at Conoco to open a VW-Porsche auto shop. He was a great mechanic and perfectly suited for the business that thrived and grew nicely. His wife was from a wealthy family in the small town where they grew up, and even though she enjoyed the lifestyle afforded by the car shop, she just didn't like the fact that her husband was "a dirty-fingernail mechanic" rather than working in some of the other careers that she thought were more suitable.

After a number of miserable years he put her on waivers for purposes of granting an unconditional release.
 
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wabower said:
During threads on this subject I'm reminded of the adage that men get married thinking their wives won't change. Women get married thinking that their husbands will. Those who set about to make it happen, especially in areas that guys don't want to change, can be difficult to stomach over the long term.

A good friend left his plss-ant data processing job at Conoco to open a VW-Porsche auto shop. He was a great mechanic and perfectly suited for the business that thrived and grew nicely. His wife was from a wealthy family in the small town where they grew up, and even though she enjoyed the lifestyle afforded by the car shop, she just didn't like the fact that her husband was "a dirty-fingernail mechanic" rather than working in some of the other careers that she thought were more suitable.

After a number of miserable years he put her on waivers for purposes of granting an unconditional release.
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How many times do people get married knowing exactly what the other does or wants to do for a living (cop, fireman, military, etc) and then decide that it's not a job they can live with. We all change. Whether it is because of new interests, more or less money, family, work, etc; change is inevitable. How compatible you are is very dependent on how you can adjust to change. We know YOU WILL change.
As to the OP, perhaps what you might think about is buying less plane than you've saved for (giving in to some of your soon to be wife's desire) or plan on joining a flying club where your overall expenses should be less or partnering with someone for the plane you want but less investment. Marriage is a compromise. You want plane, she wants kids, work it out NOW.
This advise comes from a guy who still has the plane (and other toys) and not the wife of 30 years. PS: I'm still paying for her.
 
The OP should read this thread, its like a crystal ball:

http://www.pilotsofamerica.com/forum/showthread.php?t=47256&page=5

I especially like this post:

"I think they were married about 10 years or so. I imagine the whole thing was complicated, and not necessarily about just kids or flying. I did think that it was interesting that a few of you basically said: "This guy will be divorced and will be wishing he hadn't given up flying", and here we are. Although, to my knowledge, he hasn't started flying again yet."
 
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