Burger Wars!

Sac Arrow

Sac Arrow

Touchdown! Greaser!
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Snorting his way across the USA
Started roughly two weeks ago. With me anyway. One of my favorite go-to fast food burger joints is Carl's Jr., which has a lettuce wrap low carb burger as one of its options. And they are flamed broiled. Doesn't get better than that.

Or does it.

So I was three quarters of the way through a fifty mile ride on the bike, my lime green spandex soaked with sweat and badly splintered in the back by an errant two by four, and I needed some FOOD. I got my standard lettuce wrapped six-dollar burger (1/2 lb burger patty.) But something was different. I don't know if it was actually different, or I just now noticed it, but, the hamburger looked and tasted like it had FILLERS in it!! What?? Carl's? No, tell me it ain't so.

It's so. Reference Carl's own nutrition guide, the "Low Carb Six Dollar Burger" contains a "Beefsteak Patty, Angus - Black Angus Beef, Salt, Sodium Phosphate, and Spices." They had enough "Sodium Phosphate" and "Spices", which could contain pretty much anything including soy filler, that it actually changed the texture of the meat.

Why am I so conscious of it now?

Perhaps because I've been habituating other burger joints in search of a good burger, ranging from small mini-chains to mom and pop burger joints. Some are better than others. One of my favorites, Habit Burger, is the real deal, and char broiled, and they do the lettuce wrap thing. Another one, Smashburger, seems to be real beef but their shtick is to smash the burger in to some frazzled mess. No matter because they don't have any in the East Bay anyway. Really the best burger in my opinion is simply my local Korean run mom and pop burger joint (run, not surprisingly, by a Korean mom and pop.) People think Korean food is all bulgoki , kimchee an rice, but no, the Koreans do like their burgers - and fried chicken.

I'm on point for new and exciting burger venues. I'm starting to rebel against the major large fast food chains. They're just inflexible, and their clientel, well, I've concluded that McDonald's is the food of the tards.
 
I like 5 Guys burgers. That's about as close to fast food as I care to get.
 
San Francisco is a bizarre place. Is everyone from there obsessed about the most mundane topics?

I'm expecting the next thread from SF to be about "The evils of glasses that are round and accentuate the wrong part of the face."
 
I tuned in 'cause I was a little hungry...got to the part with a sweaty guy in lime green spandex from the Bay area and lost my appetite..... :vomit:
 
SkyHog said:
San Francisco is a bizarre place. Is everyone from there obsessed about the most mundane topics?

I'm expecting the next thread from SF to be about "The evils of glasses that are round and accentuate the wrong part of the face."
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No, many are obsessed with bizarre topics as well.

But you bring up a good point about round glasses. I may just address that in a separate thread at some point.

Sam D said:
Have you tried Nations?
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Yeah, but it's more of a standard burger and fry place. Not bad at all, but they struggle with the bunless concept and don't have salads on the menu. Not optimal for the low carb thing.
 
You're in Oakland. Have you tried Bongo Burger?

Don't go there looking for beef, though. Those are lamb burgers.
 
Haha! Well they DO have beef, but yeah they have falafels and hummus and all. How Berkeley can you get.
 
Sam D said:
Have you tried Nations?
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:yeahthat:

Nation's giant burgers were my favorite Bay area burger while living in Tracy. Now I'm in the DC area, so Five Guys to go, Samuel Beckett's Guinness Burger or lamb burger to sit down and savor.
 
Sac Arrow said:
Haha! Well they DO have beef, but yeah they have falafels and hummus and all. How Berkeley can you get.
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It's halfway between People's Park and Telegraph Ave. Need I say more?

I rather enjoyed the lamb burgers when I was a student.

Although Berkeley isn't like Berkeley anymore. Even when I was a student during the High Middle Ages, the old farts from the Roman period hadn't figured that out...People's Park was a total dump (it's not nearly as bad anymore), kept that way in memory of an incident that had happened 20 years earlier and had clearly gotten lost in legend.
 
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Well they closed most of them, but I still think there is one in Davis; Redrum burger (formerly Murder Burger, but folks took offense). I like the Ostrich, but they have beef and Buffalo, too.
 
Just eat In-n-Out and stop complaining. You realize that 90% of the country doesn't have access to the most delicious burger in the country??
 
John221us said:
Well they closed most of them, but I still think there is one in Davis; Redrum burger
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Still there as of March.

The Standing Room in Redondo Beach CA. The White Spot in Charlottesville VA. Nothing in between really matters.

Nauga,
in moderation
 
Culver's in the midwest is as good as or slightly better than Five Guys.
 
In the Bay Area I was always fond of Clarke's on El Camino Real in Mountain View. Nice decent hunk of meat and a bar that had just about anything you could conceive of putting on a burger.

Actually, I'm not really all that fond of the greaseballs from 5 guys. In my mind they're like oversized White Castles. The fries there aren't bad though.
 
I realize that the term hamburger refers mainly to the type of meat, but I gotta say, if it aint got no bun, it aint no burger.

A bun or toast of some kind must be present for hamburger meat/ground beef to transcend into a burger.

If it's a patty wrapped in lettuce, it's just girl food.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it. ;)

And why the hell would anyone want to attempt to make a burger healthy?

Pfft.....dang San Fransiscans. :nonod:
 
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John221us said:
Well they closed most of them, but I still think there is one in Davis; Redrum burger (formerly Murder Burger, but folks took offense). I like the Ostrich, but they have beef and Buffalo, too.
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The Ostrich was the real draw, but that aside their burgers were fairly mediocre. But big.

SkyHog said:
Just eat In-n-Out and stop complaining. You realize that 90% of the country doesn't have access to the most delicious burger in the country??
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I almost forgot about Inn & Out. Yeah, I eat there too. Yes, they do lettuce wrap.

txflyer said:
I thought it was going to be about flying to get hamburgers ...
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Conventional wisdom says so but I'm within walking distance to good burgage. I'm usually getting some kind of esoteric seafood or maybe a big assed steak when I go flying.

OkieFlyer said:
I realize that the term hamburger refers mainly to the type of meat, but I gotta say, if it aint got no bun, it aint no burger.

A bun or toast of some kind must be present for hamburger meat/ground beef to transcend into a burger.

If it's a patty wrapped in lettuce, it's just girl food.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it. ;)

And why the hell would anyone want to attempt to make a burger healthy?

Pfft.....dang San Fransiscans. :nonod:
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Haha yeah well I fit better in my lime green spandex if I forgo the bun.
 
Hey, glad I could come into this at the perfect point in the conversation (was going to post it anyway): I've given sac a hard time about his lettuce burgers for awhile. Well, last night when my parents made burgers, I said what the heck--I'll try the lettuce wrap. And it was actually really good! Fresh romaine, 4 leaves of it total, and I could actually taste the flavors of the burger much better. I wouldn't recommend this with a bad burger, since the bun masks a lot of the flavor, but these were nice, juicy half pounders made fresh that day from prime ground beef. I have to say, I totally get it now! Yeah, Sac does it for numerous reasons, but even just for taste, it's something I'd recommend trying.
Now to get in my hot pink spandex and take my bike down the left lane of the highway...
 
All right, first of all, apparently I have to defend my spandex. All I can say is, dress for the occasion. Some here ride bikes, some don't. Those that ride them can tell you that heavy denim, flannel shirts, cowboy boots and ten gallon hats DON'T WORK for riding bicycles, particularly if you're doing 50+ mile rides. Nor do thick sweats or loose shorts. People wear this stuff for functionality, not style. You need something that won't abrade and will wick sweat away from you.

If Okieflyer called and said "Hey Sac, you mind helping me round up the steers?" I'd say "no problem, I'll hep you if you give me some barbeque and low calorie beer" but I'm not showing up in biking clothes, I'm showing up in heavy denim, cowboy boots and some kind of shirt I don't mind getting cow poo on (yes I own all three.)

Secondly, some people well, just shouldn't wear spandex at all. I think I can say without arrogance that I'm not one of them.

Anyway, digressing a bit, it just occurred to me that I had a failure to maintain burger communications at the exact same Carl's Jr. that gave me the burger that made me aware they used fillers in the meat just a week prior. It went down like this:

Sac Arrow: "I would like a low-carb six dollar burger and a small drink."

Hot Latina cashier: "Okay I have a (insert Peanuts adult noises here) six dollar burger and a small drink. For here or to go?"

Sac Arrow: "For here please." (I guess you have to ask, but I'm dressed in biking clothes and I obviously have no means of carrying a bag.)

A few minutes later....

Sac Arrow: "Hi, this is probably somebody else's hamburger. I ordered a low-carb six dollar burger."

Angry Latina cashier: "But you said original six dollar burger."

Sac Arrow: "I did?" Looking at the receipt. Receipt said "Original six dollar burger."

She made good on it anyway. Thank you sweetie. Where was the failure? I am absolutely positive I said "low carb six dollar burger." But I missed the readback. She PROBABLY read back "original six dollar burger" but my mind completely glossed over it. All I remember hearing was "six dollar burger" and "small drink." So, it was just as much on me. No matter, I still got what I wanted. The burger anyway. Damn those tight little form fitting black pants were nice. (Side note - one negative about biking spandex, appreciation for Latinas wearing tight little form fitting black pants becomes more evident.)
 
flyingron said:
In the Bay Area I was always fond of Clarke's on El Camino Real in Mountain View. Nice decent hunk of meat and a bar that had just about anything you could conceive of putting on a burger.

Actually, I'm not really all that fond of the greaseballs from 5 guys. In my mind they're like oversized White Castles. The fries there aren't bad though.
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I work down the street from Clarke's (other end of Castro). I agree; I go there once in a while. Best burgers in Silicon Valley, especially compared to the In & Out down the street. I grew up with In & Out; while I'll agree they are better than the usual fast food large chains, they really don't do much more for me.

Now if only Clarke's were anywhere near a public use airport....that's a long haul for an out of town pilot, or an East Bay resident.
 
Burgers - I love in-n-out. Not only they are tasty and cheap, they use fresh ingredients and non-frozen patties. I try to avoid burgers using generic frozen patties with fillers and pink slime.

Low carb diet - I've also been on low carb for years, and for me the key is to reduce *sugar* intake. I can't eat my burgers without buns and a side of fries.
 
SkyHog said:
Just eat In-n-Out and stop complaining. You realize that 90% of the country doesn't have access to the most delicious burger in the country??
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You know, I used to be in the same boat. For the first few times, it was better. Then after really sitting down and looking at it, my favorite now is either Whataburger or Culvers.
 
bartmc said:
Let's meet about 30 miles deep in the Frank Church wilderness and have this discussion, you can wear your aggro biking jersey... ah hem "top".
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That's harsh dude. So do you still keep tabs on the dudes on your former board?

AdamZ said:
Red Robin .......Yuuuummmmmm
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Dude. Like... At the risk of ****ing off the senior POA management, Round Robin has been a flop to me. Tiny burger, bottomless fries (I can't eat ONE) and, uh. Well that's my gripe. In their defense, I went there later and had some kind of salad that had chicken on it and it was okay, as in I'd have another, but...
 
There is a Fuddruckers on Sunrise near the mall (Citrus Heights?). They are out of my way and I don't get there much, but I think they grind their own and have Buffalo and maybe Ostrich. Also, Roxy's on Fair Oaks near Howe has a great Buffalo burger.
 
Fuddrucker's burgers are "meaty-ocre" (haha I invented a new word! How does the kid do it?) But their thing is you can stuff as much toppings on your burger as you want. Well the standard stuff anyway, I think you have to pay extra for bacon and crap like that but it's been a while since I've been to one.

There is a place in Davis (and downtown Sac too I think) called Burgers & Brew that has excellent burgers - half pound patties and of the good stuff. They are a little skimpy on the veggies though if you go with side salads and all but the best I've had so Far East of Napa.

Speaking if which, the Napa County Airport used to have a restaurant on field that had outstanding burgers. Unfortunately they closed, which bites major donkey chunk.
 
I'm another Nation Burger vote although they too have downsized over the years along with everything else. A Nation Burger used to be something that you tilted up vertically on the table with both hands then bent over to eat, you didn't actually pick the burger up, at least not until you were about half way through it.
 
Okay you peaked my interest. So... Nations burgers. According to their burger menu they are "3/4 lb or more." Is that accurate? As in a 3/4 lb patty, or are they referring to the total weight including buns and veggies?

I'm just trying to plan here. I'm trying to figure out if I should plan on getting one or two. If I'm looking at a half pound patty, I would normally get one. 1/3 or 1/4 lb patties, I would get two or a double. 3 oz patties, two doubles.
 
SkyHog said:
San Francisco is a bizarre place. Is everyone from there obsessed about the most mundane topics?

I'm expecting the next thread from SF to be about "The evils of glasses that are round and accentuate the wrong part of the face."
Click to expand...

We just have time for these things because we're not shoveling our driveways :D
 
I'm a Five Guys guy myself. It's what I've grown up on, because they were always the best burger joint in town. They started in the DC area, and I've been to the oldest one several times.
 
Okay, so, like, check it out yo. Linear programming issue:

Problem Statement:

At restaurant A, I can get a 10 oz. double cheeseburger (BA) for $5.60 and a side salad (SA) for $2.95. At restaurant B, I can get a double 6 oz. burger for $4.10 (BB and a side salad (SB for $3.95. Let's say I eat burgers five days a week.

Constraints:

No more than 50 oz. of hamburger in a given week. At least 30 oz. of hamburger in a given week.

No more than 12 oz. hamburger in one meal.

At least three side salads in a given week.

Meal L consists of 1 BA plus salad SA.
Meal M consists of 1 BB plus salad SB.
Meal N consists of 2 BB

Objective:

How many combinations of L, M and N to order in a given week to minimize costs while satisfying the given constraints?

(I suspect in formulating the equations, L, M and N will need to be eliminated as variables and formulated as constraints as X, Y, SA and SB.)

So who can figure out the set of linear programming equations? Can either be solvable by matrix or graphical corner solution methodology.
 
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A local talk show host did a whole segment on crappy vs good burgers around here a couple of days ago, and the consensus was either find a local shop (non-chain) or grill your own. Sorry. No help here.

(But his callers did tip me off to a small neighborhood meat market with two locations who grill over real charcoal every Friday night and compete to see which store sells the most. Oh man, I have to go to one of them sometime...)

Ain't nothing better than a plump little handmade burger over charcoal.
 
ebykowsky said:
Hey, glad I could come into this at the perfect point in the conversation (was going to post it anyway): I've given sac a hard time about his lettuce burgers for awhile. Well, last night when my parents made burgers, I said what the heck--I'll try the lettuce wrap. And it was actually really good! Fresh romaine, 4 leaves of it total, and I could actually taste the flavors of the burger much better. I wouldn't recommend this with a bad burger, since the bun masks a lot of the flavor, but these were nice, juicy half pounders made fresh that day from prime ground beef. I have to say, I totally get it now! Yeah, Sac does it for numerous reasons, but even just for taste, it's something I'd recommend trying.
Now to get in my hot pink spandex and take my bike down the left lane of the highway...
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Which reminds me, I woke up in a cold sweat last night debating about the various merits of using iceberg lettuce vs. Romaine for wrapping hamburgers (I've done both.)

I like Romaine better than iceberg or some of the other fancy foo foo greens as a primary salad constituent, but for wrapping burgers, iceberg is superior, done properly. It's fairly strong and has some constitution.

The one burger joint I had mentioned that had superior burgers used some kind of chard greens to wrap their burgers in. Wussy chard greens are fine in salads (actually I don't really like them that much) but for wrapping burgers, not so much.
 
So I was just heading out to Nation's to try it. I no sooner got a block away from the office when I saw three of my homies chillin' on a picnic table at the corner park. They appeared to be setting up for.... a bbq!!

"Yo homes (intended in the plural sense), yous about to do some grilling?"

"Bet dogg, we got chicken, dogs, burgers and some Carlos Rossi. You welcome to join in. We running a little lean on the meat though."

Hmm I thought. This is an excellent opportunity. They got like lettuce, tomatoes, onion and crap like that. "Mind if I throw a burger of my own on that grill?"

"Bet dogg."

"Aight. Be right back. Need anything?"

"Maybe some more Carlos Rossi."

"Bet dat."

There is grocery store not too far away so I ran in there, and found their "Beef, ground, 20% fat content." Perfect for barbequing. The lean stuff below 15% falls apart. 0.82 lbs. Perfect! Got back, hand formed it in to a most righteous burger patty, brushed on a little of that Chaka Mmm sauce they had for the chicken and proceeded to cook it to perfection. Grabbed some outer lettuce leaves, put on some mayo, some mustard, onions, tomatoes and pickles and chowed that mutha down.

Total bill, including the jug of Carlos Rossi was under ten bucks.

Maybe tomorrow for Nation's.
 
One vote for Big Jud's in Boise, ID.


The Double Big Jud Burger:
big+jud+and+the+BIG+JUD.png.jpg
 
Wow. A 2 lb burger is over the top even for me. I'd woof a 1 lb down no problem. Those do look good.
 
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