A tale of two sign girls...

Sac Arrow

Touchdown! Greaser!
Joined
May 11, 2010
Messages
20,353
Location
Charlotte, NC
Display Name

Display name:
Snorting his way across the USA
Okay so my standard burger ride has me heading north from an older neighborhood into a huge, recently being overly developed urban sprawl residential area. In other words, California's rice fields now growing entitled yuppy offspring, and not at a large yield given the land mass involved.

Well that's here nor there. I like going there because they have nice wide lanes with bike paths, a few nice fast food options with Burger Girls, and the hood is not sketch. As you might imagine, when you build huge masses of tract homes, you have to sell them. Enter the sign girls.

A sign girl's job is fairly straightforward. Stand at a street corner in the vicinity of a new residential development still under construction, wave a sign, and dance around and wiggle your little bottom as oncoming traffic is passing by. Well in my case a bike, and every time I pass, she senses my intense animal magnetism and becomes horrified and feigns a phone call so she doesn't have to make eye to eye contact with me. But that's not the point. That is sign girl #1. Despite our personal differences, I respect that she is doing a good job, and has a good work ethic.

Now a little bit about sign girls that I've learned. They aren't hired by the developers, at least not directly. They are hired by companies such as Pride Industries that excels in placing otherwise unemployable individuals in productive environments such as janitorial services, usually in places other than in schools and day care facilities. I think you see where I am going with this. Let's back up to three or four years ago. There was a sign girl along the route that I would regularly engage in conversation with during intersection stops. She seemed slightly hardened, called me 'sir' and spoke with formalities. I actually had her pegged as ex military. In fact I asked her. Her response was, 'no, I just know how to respect people.' No, she didn't learn these things in the military. She learned those things in 'the system.' She was a product of 'the system.' And as such, pretty much didn't have too many other job opportunities. Exactly what her issues were I don't know. Drugs possibly but she wasn't so far gone she had sunken eyes, missing teeth and track marks. Maybe prostitution but she didn't have the demeanor of a very good ho. As in successful. I'm guessing probably more likely violence. But who knows, I may be overanalyzing things.

Okay that's the backdrop. So we know that sign girls are either 1) former criminals, or 2) developmentally disabled. Since they are placed in autonomous positions, the former is generally the case. So let's talk about sign girl #2.

Sign girl #2 has a post on a fairly new intersection in a remote part of the road separating the right side of the tracks from the wrong side of the tracks by a good stretch of open space. It's open space for now, anyway. She has... the worst work ethic I had ever seen. I would hate for her to be in my employ. For starters, she stands there like a tree stump. And sometimes she has the sign propped up horizontally, but most times she's just leaning on it. And the kicker, she's facing the wrong way! Yeah. passing traffic going south couldn't possibly read the sign. Hell, last weekend she spent the afternoon on a chair under a tree fifty feet from the intersection.

I mean I sort of get the logic. If the traffic is going south, they probably already live in the new area and they likely aren't shopping for a house. But the northbound traffic can't really see her either, and how would they notice, she acts like a telephone pole. C'mon, girl, have half a brain. I get it that you don't want to cross the road - it's a T intersection and you have no shade or sidewalk protection. I get it. At least TRY to get the attention of the southbound traffic. SG1 does it. I mean, I know that calling out a 'person of the sign' is a bit nitpicky, but it's just one of those recurring sights that gets one thinking.
 
I guess I don't get out much. Never knew there was such a thing...
 
There are worse sign jobs. We have a place called Mr. Pickle and every day at lunch someone in a pickle suit stands there dancing and waving a sign.
 
Okay so my standard burger ride has me heading north from an older neighborhood into a huge, recently being overly developed urban sprawl residential area. In other words, California's rice fields now growing entitled yuppy offspring, and not at a large yield given the land mass involved.

Well that's here nor there. I like going there because they have nice wide lanes with bike paths, a few nice fast food options with Burger Girls, and the hood is not sketch. As you might imagine, when you build huge masses of tract homes, you have to sell them. Enter the sign girls.

A sign girl's job is fairly straightforward. Stand at a street corner in the vicinity of a new residential development still under construction, wave a sign, and dance around and wiggle your little bottom as oncoming traffic is passing by. Well in my case a bike, and every time I pass, she senses my intense animal magnetism and becomes horrified and feigns a phone call so she doesn't have to make eye to eye contact with me. But that's not the point. That is sign girl #1. Despite our personal differences, I respect that she is doing a good job, and has a good work ethic.

Now a little bit about sign girls that I've learned. They aren't hired by the developers, at least not directly. They are hired by companies such as Pride Industries that excels in placing otherwise unemployable individuals in productive environments such as janitorial services, usually in places other than in schools and day care facilities. I think you see where I am going with this. Let's back up to three or four years ago. There was a sign girl along the route that I would regularly engage in conversation with during intersection stops. She seemed slightly hardened, called me 'sir' and spoke with formalities. I actually had her pegged as ex military. In fact I asked her. Her response was, 'no, I just know how to respect people.' No, she didn't learn these things in the military. She learned those things in 'the system.' She was a product of 'the system.' And as such, pretty much didn't have too many other job opportunities. Exactly what her issues were I don't know. Drugs possibly but she wasn't so far gone she had sunken eyes, missing teeth and track marks. Maybe prostitution but she didn't have the demeanor of a very good ho. As in successful. I'm guessing probably more likely violence. But who knows, I may be overanalyzing things.

Okay that's the backdrop. So we know that sign girls are either 1) former criminals, or 2) developmentally disabled. Since they are placed in autonomous positions, the former is generally the case. So let's talk about sign girl #2.

Sign girl #2 has a post on a fairly new intersection in a remote part of the road separating the right side of the tracks from the wrong side of the tracks by a good stretch of open space. It's open space for now, anyway. She has... the worst work ethic I had ever seen. I would hate for her to be in my employ. For starters, she stands there like a tree stump. And sometimes she has the sign propped up horizontally, but most times she's just leaning on it. And the kicker, she's facing the wrong way! Yeah. passing traffic going south couldn't possibly read the sign. Hell, last weekend she spent the afternoon on a chair under a tree fifty feet from the intersection.

I mean I sort of get the logic. If the traffic is going south, they probably already live in the new area and they likely aren't shopping for a house. But the northbound traffic can't really see her either, and how would they notice, she acts like a telephone pole. C'mon, girl, have half a brain. I get it that you don't want to cross the road - it's a T intersection and you have no shade or sidewalk protection. I get it. At least TRY to get the attention of the southbound traffic. SG1 does it. I mean, I know that calling out a 'person of the sign' is a bit nitpicky, but it's just one of those recurring sights that gets one thinking.
Show her this. She may be inspired

 
About 10 years ago a movie was being shot in town, and I answered a casting call for extras. During the day I was making conversation, and asked the guy next to me what he did, and he said he worked in non-profit social services. It was about two weeks before it dawned on me what he meant.

Then I found out there’s a whole subculture of people who know where the productions are and follow them around and live in their campers in the Walmart parking lot and eke out a living as extras. Later in the day, one guy was explaining to the others “the best gigs are the industrial safety training videos” and the best thing about being an extra is “there’s no drug testing.”

So next time you have to watch a safety video….
 
We have "sign people" but I've never noted any that were attractive enough to look at. They're minimum wage people paid to sit there to twirl the signs to get around the ordinances prohibiting stationary signs in certain places. They tend to be things like the Tax Prep companies around tax time here. At least they are putting some money into the community compared to illegally nailing the mass produced signs to various sign posts and telephone poles or having a truck that drives around with a sign solely for the purpose of having it seen.
 
That's a lot of thinking for a "sign girl." I suppose like a long XC, a bike ride gives you time to ponder ...
 
thread_needs_pics_198.jpg
 
I don't know, but I suspect the attractiveness factor is somewhat budget dependent. Land developers have large budgets for extended sign person campaigns. Tax houses and franchise restaurants do not. I would agree that in general, sign people are not attractive in the slightest.

I have to admit though, when I see the new tract home sign girls, I fantasize a bit about being the naughty prison guard.
 
I know, right, and I had a golden opportunity to catch SG2 in her wrong way pose yesterday. But I was in the car and it was too late. I may however get the opportunity today if I end up going on a Burger Ride. Otherwise, the next opportunity is next Saturday.
 
sg2.jpg

All right well here you go. This is SG2. I'm on the main road. She's facing a dead end side street that gets almost no traffic. Right after the photo, she retreated to her seat under a tree 50 feet to the right.
 
We used to have a Little Ceasar’s sign guy near us. Hold the sign in one hand and fist pump with one of those big Hulk hands with the other. He’d switch hands when he got tired and the Hulk hand always looked wrong.
 
I'm seeing girth. Not sure it would have registered for me :p
Yes there is a tad of girth there. Now SG1 on the other hand is a tight little package. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have been able to pull off a photo however.
 
What is the point of having a sign girl trying to attract home buyers? Do people who are going to drop half a million or more really find real estate that way? I know a couple minimum wage chair warmers are a drop in the bucket to a developer, but do they actually get any return at all on it?
 
What is the point of having a sign girl trying to attract home buyers? Do people who are going to drop half a million or more really find real estate that way? I know a couple minimum wage chair warmers are a drop in the bucket to a developer, but do they actually get any return at all on it?

well, silly analogy, but have you ever seen a bunch of high school cheerleaders jumping up and down "advertising" a fund raising car wash with a sign (I'm sure they had a sign, didn't they??)? a friend, def not me, but a friend says he's much more inclined to get his car washed right then and there, even if it's still dripping wet from the drive-thru car wash he just came from. he thought maybe the first one had missed a spot, and thought, well, I see these girls with a car wash sign, maybe I should get another car wash, just to make sure. it's kind of like that. maybe.
 
What is the point of having a sign girl trying to attract home buyers? Do people who are going to drop half a million or more really find real estate that way? I know a couple minimum wage chair warmers are a drop in the bucket to a developer, but do they actually get any return at all on it?

I think that would depend entirely on the minimum-wage chair-warmer...
 
What is the point of having a sign girl trying to attract home buyers? Do people who are going to drop half a million or more really find real estate that way? I know a couple minimum wage chair warmers are a drop in the bucket to a developer, but do they actually get any return at all on it?
I know land developers. I've worked with land developers. Trust me, they are cheap, callous bastards and there is a special place in hell for them. They don't spend one penny on amenities that don't yield a return.
 
UPDATE:

1. SG1 has been absent for a few weeks but has now been replaced. The replacement is not an upgrade. Don't ask for pics.

2. Two new additional Sign Girls appeared on the scene. Not pic worthy because they were dressed in cold weather sweats.

3. Lennar Homes has come to the same conclusion that SG2 (see post #14) is worthless and canned her a**. It's still a new enough subdivision that they might post another.
 
A house is not an impulse buy. Why is this a thing? When I buy a house, I get on the internet and search by school district or some other area identifier.
I wonder what the conversion rate is on house sales that started with a sign girl.
 
View attachment 120661

All right well here you go. This is SG2. I'm on the main road. She's facing a dead end side street that gets almost no traffic. Right after the photo, she retreated to her seat under a tree 50 feet to the right.
Holy crap. I thought Texas was dry. How has this not spontaneously combusted?
 
I know land developers. I've worked with land developers. Trust me, they are cheap, callous bastards and there is a special place in hell for them. They don't spend one penny on amenities that don't yield a return.
I agree with cheap and callous but….the ones I’ve known have done many things with negative or zero return…like sign girls for new homes.
 
A house is not an impulse buy. Why is this a thing? When I buy a house, I get on the internet and search by school district or some other area identifier.
I wonder what the conversion rate is on house sales that started with a sign girl.
This is California, and the market is Bay Area refugees fleeing their multi-million dollar homes.

Holy crap. I thought Texas was dry. How has this not spontaneously combusted?
Trust me, it does.
 
Lennar Homes has come to the same conclusion that SG2 (see post #14) is worthless and canned her a**.

Speculation or knowledge?

Maybe it’s a Cinderella story and she was whisked away by a drive-by millionaire who prefers Rubenesque femmes with poor work ethics.

We may never know....
 
Just to be clear, Sign Girls do have a function past flaunting wiggly posteriors. The signs they wield, when properly. wielded, point to the location of the model homes, which may not be apparent from the main roadway. There is value in that - even seasoned planner buyers want to check out the goods in person. I know I've spent a fair amount of time perusing model homes.
 
Just to be clear, Sign Girls do have a function past flaunting wiggly posteriors. The signs they wield, when properly. wielded, point to the location of the model homes, which may not be apparent from the main roadway. There is value in that - even seasoned planner buyers want to check out the goods in person. I know I've spent a fair amount of time perusing model homes.
I see. So in these instances, perhaps the mantra "location, location, location" is not meant as much as a reinforcement of the importance of the location as it is a demonstration that the home may inhabit multiple locations within a very short time frame?
sign-flip.gif
 
I see. So in these instances, perhaps the mantra "location, location, location" is not meant as much as a reinforcement of the importance of the location as it is a demonstration that the home may inhabit multiple locations within a very short time frame?
View attachment 122346
That individual is all over the place. Literally.
 
So, an update:

Location #1

The hot sign girl had been downgraded a few weeks ago. That one was downgraded to a dude. At least he had his act together.

Location #2

This is a relatively new location. The last few weeks it was manned by a sign guy. I want to say he was upgraded to a sign girl, but it depends on how you define upgrade. She had a stoned look on her face, and her sign was pointed in the opposite direction of the new homes. They should have either issued her a sign with an arrow pointing in the opposite direction, or instructed her to stand on the opposite intersection corner. In any case trusting her to do the logical thing was not the correct thing to do.

Location #3

This is a brand new location. It was manned by a sign guy, who, while he didn't point the sign in the wrong direction, was not at the logical corner to direct traffic to the new homes. He also made crude attempts at sign dancing. Think clumsy white guy trying to break dance.

It would make a LOT of sense to issue signs printed on both sides, so they could be used bidirectionally. I've seen them before. I know they exist.
 
So, an update:

Location #1

The hot sign girl had been downgraded a few weeks ago. That one was downgraded to a dude. At least he had his act together.

Location #2

This is a relatively new location. The last few weeks it was manned by a sign guy. I want to say he was upgraded to a sign girl, but it depends on how you define upgrade. She had a stoned look on her face, and her sign was pointed in the opposite direction of the new homes. They should have either issued her a sign with an arrow pointing in the opposite direction, or instructed her to stand on the opposite intersection corner. In any case trusting her to do the logical thing was not the correct thing to do.

Location #3

This is a brand new location. It was manned by a sign guy, who, while he didn't point the sign in the wrong direction, was not at the logical corner to direct traffic to the new homes. He also made crude attempts at sign dancing. Think clumsy white guy trying to break dance.

It would make a LOT of sense to issue signs printed on both sides, so they could be used bidirectionally. I've seen them before. I know they exist.
The fact that there's multiple locations tells me there's competition.
If I'm a competitor in that mix I'm not paying table-stakes to get a sign girl. Attractive or not, that's money down the drain just to break even with my peers.
I'm going to pay a meth-head $4 an hour, or a fat dude in a Hawaiian shirt and a banana hammock, or both -- to just park their ass outside my competitors neighborhood entry way and discourage entry.
They don't even need to carry a sign. Just sit there, be highly conspicuous/publicly visible, and maintain a pulse (though not required). Arguably if they don't maintain a pulse even more traffic will divert from there and come to my community development instead.
So it's kinda like win-win for me... and my hourly payroll will probably be less than a sign girl.
 
Interest rates must have realtors really hard up if they're out twirling signs in the desert trying to sell houses.
 
The fact that there's multiple locations tells me there's competition.
If I'm a competitor in that mix I'm not paying table-stakes to get a sign girl. Attractive or not, that's money down the drain just to break even with my peers.
I'm going to pay a meth-head $4 an hour, or a fat dude in a Hawaiian shirt and a banana hammock, or both -- to just park their ass outside my competitors neighborhood entry way and discourage entry.
They don't even need to carry a sign. Just sit there, be highly conspicuous/publicly visible, and maintain a pulse (though not required). Arguably if they don't maintain a pulse even more traffic will divert from there and come to my community development instead.
So it's kinda like win-win for me... and my hourly payroll will probably be less than a sign girl.
Just pay said meth head 5 bucks every deuce they drop on the competitions sidewalk.
 
Okay, latest sign girl updates:

Location #1, major intersection #1 traveling N to S

There is a brand new sign girl. An engaging sign girl, and she even smiled at me as I eyed her predatorially with biblical desire while I made a low pass on my bike. She was wielding a Heritage sign, for the Lennar development per the previous one posted at that location.

Location #2, second major intersection traveling N to S

The same stoner girl who was confused as to which way to point the sign was there. As I gazed in to her eyes I saw darkness. No flames of passion. Her recitation of the ABC's would more closely resemble the CBD's. Don't get me wrong, I'd go there if there was half a chance.

Location #2A, road leading to the Lennar development

This is the original location of the initial post. Picture on post 14. The very same girl was there. I couldn't really make eye contact because she wasn't facing any direction of traffic and there were three to choose from, including the dead end street going in to the development. Probably the third choice out of the three, but hey man, tough times.

Location #3, Intersection past Lennar

The uncoordinated clumsy wanna be sign dancer has not been there for some time. I think they realized he wasn't working out, nor was the location.
 
Back
Top