It might be dangerous having a monkey post on here. I don't have a lot of experience with monkeys, but in the few casual observations I've had they mostly screech and throw feces.
Hmm, on the other hand, he'd fit right in I guess.
Wait a sec, Sac. Oh no.
Sac! I think we may have sold the monkey into slave labor by accident man.
Monkey leaves my place just fine. No bad behavior, no acting out, enjoying himself immensely.
Then photos of monkey forced to fly on a wheel pant over an agricultural area of Texas and once he lands at Bryan's place, he's all sorts of crazy.
I fear something dastardly happened between Clark and the first stop in Texas. All these stories of "lunch runs" and what not.
I think the Texans saw there was a little brown guy with no visible means of support and forced him into the crop dusting trade, from a wheel pant!
Oh no. What have we allowed to happen to our little brown friend, Sac?! Poo slavery! No!
And now he's been shipped off to another private agricultural airport far away from the prying eyes of the public and he can't escape.
They even offered to send him to KANSAS. Holy crap. I mean, literally! They want him to crap on another State!
Poor guy. I fear the Texans hired Bryan for his writing skill to come up with a cover story about drug abuse and while he was there Bryan even forced him into the sex industry with that giant pink monkey!
What have we done? I don't think eman will ever see monkey alive without a rescue mission.
They're probably torturing him as we speak at the undisclosed Arkansas location! What do we do?
And what have you DONE Clark?!
My god man, if you needed gas money for the Frankenkota, I would have spotted you a loan!
You sold our little brown buddy into poo flinging slavery, didn't you? Didn't you?! You bastard!!
I don't know if I can handle the guilt of allowing monkey to be taken by the racist Texas land barons. Or remembering watching him leave with Clark on that fine afternoon when he was quiet and happy in his envelope thinking he was headed for his new home in North Carolina.
Oh poor poor monkey! [sobs]... He as full of hopes and dreams! What have I done? He could have stayed here and learned to shoot and fish and he wouldn't be in the hands of the evil agricultural "lunch cabal" who only wanted him for his poo flinging talents from a wheel pant of a plane!!
If only I had thought about it. Little brown guy. Texans. Secret lunch deals. I should have known!
[Breaks down in tears...]
If only there were some way to save you little buddy. Don't give up. Drugs and booze aren't the answer. We'll somehow save you and get you to your new home in North Carolina.
(Now that I think about it, someone did teach him to fish. Oh well. Not gonna rewrite that part... Maybe they were really just dunking him until he promised never to tell eman about what the Texans did to him...)