When A Child Doesn't Want to Fly

TMetzinger said:
Um.. how do you hit (regardless of the right-hand/left-hand drive issue) the clutch and the brake at the same time without using both feet?

Here with left hand drive, my left foot is for the clutch and occasionally the brake, but my right foot is for the accelerator and brake (and I have the pedals set up to allow heel-and-toe shifting).

And even though many call the Miata a "girly" car, I don't feel at all threatened driving it.
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Of course. I've already said twice now that I mistyped gas and clutch. My point was that if you use the left foot for anything but the clutch, ie the brake instead, some people could inadvertently hit the clutch when they meant the brake, and hence not brake when planning on it.

It doesn't matter anymore what I say, it will be misconstrued and someone will pick the smallest detail and crucify me for it.
 
bluee said:
Of course. I've already said twice now that I mistyped gas and clutch. My point was that if you use the left foot for anything but the clutch, ie the brake instead, some people could inadvertently hit the clutch when they meant the brake, and hence not brake when planning on it.

It doesn't matter anymore what I say, it will be misconstrued and someone will pick the smallest detail and crucify me for it.
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But that's not why...
 
Everskyward said:
And? Only the very rich patronize hookers? Really I couldn't care less. I have been mistaken for a hooker too. so what? I just think it's funny how you have a really stereotypical notion of the rich.
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You never told me this, Mari...
 
bluee said:
Of course. I've already said twice now that I mistyped gas and clutch. My point was that if you use the left foot for anything but the clutch, ie the brake instead, some people could inadvertently hit the clutch when they meant the brake, and hence not brake when planning on it.

It doesn't matter anymore what I say, it will be misconstrued and someone will pick the smallest detail and crucify me for it.
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Sorry, I hadn't seen that at the time of my post.

Would you prefer nails, or straps?
:)
 
Ghery said:
Seriously motivated if she got into veterinary school. My dad was on the faculty of the veterinary school at WSU years ago and headed the admissions committee for a number of years. Not easy getting in. 700 applicants for 70 openings each year. Good for your daughter!
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Thanks, Ghery. Yea, she was driven. She is now drinking from the firehose, but loves it. The first year students have 24 credit hours for this semester. Wild.
 
jason said:
With all due respect, Jay, this is the part that I don't get. What pickle? If she doesn't want to be a pilot she doesn't want to be a pilot. I'm sure that all of our parents watched us grow up hoping that we would all be doctors and lawyers. We all have different paths in life. You not fulfilling your parent's dreams for you doesn't mean that they aren't proud of you or that you haven't accomplished a hell of lot in your life.

It's not like she's saying "Dad, I've had enough of this sober thing. I think I'm going to give meth a try." THAT would be a pickle. She's just not as interested in doing what you're interested in doing.

Will she regret it? Who knows...maybe. If she wants to do it some day, she'll pay for it like the rest of us did and she'll probably appreciate it even more.

I think that what you're offering them is a phenomenal opportunity. I guess that I just don't see how her not wanting to take you up on it means that she's screwing up her life.
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No one thinks she is screwing up her life. Unlike most families, however, we have deliberately treated flying no differently than driving a car -- it's just another, way cooler mode of transportation. For our daughter to not want to pursue a pilot's license, after flying with us for 17 years -- even when we offer to pay for it -- is unexpected.

In our family, flying has always been "normal". Thus, her choice is (IMHO) not unlike other kids not wanting to learn to drive. In other words, weird.

So, we'll see what happens next. At this point, she's focused exclusively on school, and school clubs, which is just fine.
 
She's a good kid, Jay. If the weirdest thing in life is that she wasn't born with the same passion for flying as the rest of the family, well, there are worse things. Who knows, maybe she's just a late bloomer.
 
I read a lot of this thread. I have no kids.

My personal opinion. If she's willing to do it, without it becoming contentious, it's ok if she does it for you.

Sometimes children thank parents years later for the insights and giudance they provided, on issues they didn't see any use for.
 
jason said:
I have a cousin that went through a similar situation when he was raising his kids.

He was the middle child of three boys. All three grew up playing every sport imaginable. In high school all three excelled at all of the major sports...making the state playoffs in basketball and all-star football teams. Two of them played football in college.

When his only son started to come of age, it was a certainty that he would be a star athlete, right? Well, except that he had absolutely no interest in sports. None whatsoever. It killed my cousin to take his son to Nebraska football games, only to have him sit there during the game reading books.

His son is in college now. He grew up to be a fabulous musician and vocalist. He can barely read sheet music, but can make a grown man weep when he's playing the piano. It took my cousin a while to realize that his son had his own passion and, in many respects, his talents far outpaced his peers. They just weren't on the ball field.

Instead of dragging him outside to play catch...he supported him in every way. It was difficult for him, but his son grew up to be an amazing person.

The bottom line is that flying isn't for everyone. If it isn't her passion it isn't her passion. No amount of you wanting it to be will make it so. Support her in finding her passions and watch her flourish. She doesn't have to love what you love...she just has to have a dream of her own to chase.
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Good story, Jason. For Jay, I'd say the title of this thread is wrong; it's not "doesn't want to FLY", it's just that Becca "doesn't want to BE A PILOT" right NOW.

If flying lessons aren't her thing at this time, ask her what she really really really wants to do, and offer to get her lessons in THAT instead. As the father of three daughters myself, I know she'll be thrilled that you're wanting to support and inspire and make possible whatever dream it is that she has, whatever it is that moves her.
 
Jay Honeck said:
So, we'll see what happens next. At this point, she's focused exclusively on school, and school clubs, which is just fine.
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Watch out. You don't want to know what really went on in the "algebra" club I started in high school....
 
I took our children flying plenty. None developed an interest beyond, "Can we go there?"

When I was a teen I would have crawled through broken glass to go flying. But that was my interest.

One aspect of parenting is preparing children to be autonomous adults. That includes developing their own interests and preferences, which often are very different from ours.
 
kontiki said:
I read a lot of this thread. I have no kids.

My personal opinion. If she's willing to do it, without it becoming contentious, it's ok if she does it for you.

Sometimes children thank parents years later for the insights and giudance they provided, on issues they didn't see any use for.
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The problem with aviation is that anything less than full commitment opens the "danger door". If she has other stress and anxieties or whatever, talk to her. But if she honestly, I know it's hard to believe, really isn't interested, you gotta just go with that. This isn't piano or ballet lessons, you screw this up you die.
 
bluee said:
My smaller feet also mean I can shift faster/better with a clutch, because those pedals are close together. I know everyone thinks they are a good driver, but I am.
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Danica? Is that you? :D
 
EdFred said:
What pedals are close together? In my car I can stick my feet between the gas and the brake, and the brake and the clutch with no problem.
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I remember way back when I thought I wanted a sports car (this is the cowboy boot-wearing, pickup truck driving, 6 foot tall redneck, remember - there's another stereotype for you) and I tried to test drive a Triumph TR3. Getting into it (or perhaps "putting it on") was not all that bad. However, when it came time to get out, my feet got stuck under the pedals, my knees got stuck under the steering wheel, and I had to open the door and sort of roll over and crawl out on my hands.

I ended up buying a Datsun 300Z... but went back to trucks again after a couple of years. Wish I still had the Z...
 
gkainz said:
I remember way back when I thought I wanted a sports car (this is the cowboy boot-wearing, pickup truck driving, 6 foot tall redneck, remember - there's another stereotype for you) and I tried to test drive a Triumph TR3. Getting into it (or perhaps "putting it on") was not all that bad. However, when it came time to get out, my feet got stuck under the pedals, my knees got stuck under the steering wheel, and I had to open the door and sort of roll over and crawl out on my hands.

I ended up buying a Datsun 300Z... but went back to trucks again after a couple of years. Wish I still had the Z...
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You'd hate my MR2. When I took my postdoc in it the windshield came up to his chin.
 
TangoWhiskey said:
If flying lessons aren't her thing at this time, ask her what she really really really wants to do, and offer to get her lessons in THAT instead. As the father of three daughters myself, I know she'll be thrilled that you're wanting to support and inspire and make possible whatever dream it is that she has, whatever it is that moves her.
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That's exactly what I've done. Now she wants to get a motorcycle, so we'll be paying for her AMA riding class soon.

Great...from the frying pan to the fire... :wink2:
 
Henning said:
The problem with aviation is that anything less than full commitment opens the "danger door". If she has other stress and anxieties or whatever, talk to her. But if she honestly, I know it's hard to believe, really isn't interested, you gotta just go with that. This isn't piano or ballet lessons, you screw this up you die.
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Exactly. I'm sure she would have taken lessons, if we had just gone ahead and signed her up for them. She only told us she didn't want to when I pressed her -- which was my way of determining her commitment to the task.

I do NOT want her learning to fly with a casual attitude. I've met pilots like that, and they have often ended up hurting themselves or others.
 
Jay Honeck said:
That's exactly what I've done. Now she wants to get a motorcycle, so we'll be paying for her AMA riding class soon.

Great...from the frying pan to the fire... :wink2:
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Hell yeah, you both get a Honda XL 350 and you're good to go with where you are. Plenty of power to ride anywhere, even with a passenger. You can buy them used cheap. It's easy and cheap to keep them running forever. Great off road bikes, plenty of grunt down low. If she's real small get her a 175, nothing smaller.
 
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Henning said:
Hell yeah, you both get a Honda XL 350 and you're good to go with where you are. Plenty of power to ride anywhere, even with a passenger. You can buy them used cheap. It's easy and cheap to keep them running forever. Great off road bikes, plenty of grunt down low. If she's real small get her a 175, nothing smaller.
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She can ALMOST ride my GSX650F, but a bit lower to the ground would be better for learning.
 
Jay Honeck said:
She can ALMOST ride my GSX650F, but a bit lower to the ground would be better for learning.
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Does she already ride, or is this "first bike". First bike I always recommend solid offroad capabilities, best place to learn.
 
Henning said:
Does she already ride, or is this "first bike". First bike I always recommend solid offroad capabilities, best place to learn.
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No, this would be her learner's bike. She's ridden with me, but never solo.
 
Jay Honeck said:
No, this would be her learner's bike. She's ridden with me, but never solo.
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Let her learn how to ride in the sand, God knows you have enough of it. A good dual purpose bike also lets her have fun with friends riding either way.
 
Henning said:
Let her learn how to ride in the sand, God knows you have enough of it. A good dual purpose bike also lets her have fun with friends riding either way.
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I've never seen motorcycles in the sand here, in 18 months.

I rode my cycle on the groomed (graded) part of the beach once, right after we moved here. It was worse than riding in snow, and, of course, about 30% salt.
 
It's still good for learning because you develop the "washout" recovery instinct that may save her some skin one day when she hits oil or antifreeze. It's also soft.
 
dmccormack said:
Absolutely -- learn on a dirt bike before riding a street bike and you'll be far better off....
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Yep, you should fully be riding "by instinct" before you add traffic to mix, though where he lives it's pretty easy to avoid traffic most of the year.
 
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