I really think the TSA should take over security at all McDonald's restaurants. There have been two, or three incidents, over the past month and a couple of loud arguments. Surely the gov't wants us all secure and safe, right?
Then TSA can strip search everyone before they get in their cars, so that there is no chance someone will carry a weapon into their car.
But how can they possibly keep us safe from people who might use their car as a weapon?
Maybe the TSA should take over all driving chores, so that no one will be exposed to danger from drivers that might think about, possibly, maybe, kinda, using a car as a weapon.
But then there's pencils.
Pencils have been used to poke people for decades and the TSA hasn't even taken control of all pencil owners and potential pencil writers.
And then there's light bulbs. light bulbs have glass and could cut people so the TSA HAS to station agents inside every home, work place, school, store, gathering place, park, playground, and publicly lighted area to make sure no one uses light bulbs to hurt someone.
But then there's all those dangerous play toys. Especially plastic hammers and squirt gins.
People could use them to choke you, hit you, hi jack a nuclear aircraft carrier and all sorts of other, really angry things.
We won't be safe until the TSA strip searches every child, baby in a stroller with a plastic mobile to play with and makes sure there are no unauthorized toy.
Then we might get to be a little more safe.
There's been plenty of others, too... But I like it when they stick to the funny stuff. Like, for example, during the last presidential election: "Black man asks nation for change." 
