Sac Arrow
Touchdown! Greaser!
- Joined
- May 11, 2010
- Messages
- 21,565
- Location
- Charlotte, NC
- Display Name
- Snorting his way across the USA
By popular request (or rather, by request anyway) I’ve elected to start a thread on developing relationships. As a veteran of the game, I will bestow my experience and wisdom upon our youth and other individuals of need in seeking female companionship. This is obviously directed toward men – ladies, you don’t need help. Your angle is different, more to weed out veteran players, as men are already crawling over you.
1. Physical and mental conditioning.
In order to be a true player, you have to approach the game with the proper mentality. Obviously, we know that guys of all levels of physical conditioning can achieve relationship status, but the more fit you are, there are more opportunities that will be available to you. Plus, a greater level of physical fitness inspires more confidence, which is an important asset in relationship development. The attitude that you must generally assume for the greatest level of success is “if something develops, it develops, if not, then NBFD.”
2. Setting
Relationships can develop in any given situation, and any given place. However, statistically, you will be more successful if you focus your efforts in target rich environments. Health clubs are arguably one of the best settings available for playing the game. Bars are, as well. Night clubs, not so much. Generally, you want relatively quiet surroundings, where you are able to have extended and repeated social interactions in a relatively non-competitive environment.
3. Establish your position
Scope out the area of operations. We will discuss the health club scenario first. Typically, one has a regimen of cardiovascular exercise coupled with resistance training. Cardio machines, such as treadmills, elliptical trainers and stair masters, are ideal positions for relationship development, as they put you in close proximity to others, over extended periods of time. Group exercise classes are also excellent venues as well, particularly since you have a more narrowed common interest (the particular group exercise) and more of a reason to initiate and continue casual conversations. In the bar setting, you want to be at a relatively uncrowded location, preferably at the end of the bar facing the door or open area so you can have a better target scan. Don’t sit at a table. Bar stools and chairs are also somewhat of a detractor in that they limit mobility.
4. Choose your target
In order to have the best probability of success, you have to track and engage multiple targets over a period of time prior to performing a move making operation. It is important to recognize that while some targets are more easily acquired than others, it may be worth while expend more effort on some than others. Selectivity is key, shotgun approaches generally are not only ineffective, but they can contaminate the zone of operations by causing you to be labeled as an overt player. Successful players are players on the inside. Unsuccessful players look like they are obviously macks. Certain targets can be ruled out categorically if they are: a) accompanied by a boyfriend, b) accompanied by a girlfriend, c) part of a small (5 person or less) group. Unaccompanied, lone targets are preferred. Note that b) or c) is not necessarily a deal killer, but it requires special dynamics – a wing man. A small group of two to five girls does NOT want your company.
5. Rules of engagement
Always, always keep conversations on a friendly, casual, neutral basis until you are ready to take the next step. The key is to develop a rapport, and establish a reason to have continued conversations. This will transition automatically in to the “friend zone”. It is critical to recognize when the “friend zone” has been achieved and sufficiently developed before progressing to the next level.
6. Conducting move making operations
The most difficult and critical task faced by the player is to move the relationship past the friend zone, once it has been established that the target has been sufficiently conditioned. The key here is to not make an abrupt transition, but to make a gradual one. The most successful players do not play the game in a stepped progression, but rather in a continuous uprising sloped curve. The slope of the relationship level/time curve is somewhat dependent on the skill of the player, and the properties of the target, such as relationship status, susceptibility, gullibility, and other dynamic factors. The initial move should be based on a common interest. But it's critically important it not be an overt move. You have to create a circumstance with credible deniability - one that gives you a way out if she declines. Say you both are huge San Antonio Spurs fans. Well you may not be but she is, and hence now you are. “Wow, check it out, my company gave me a couple Spurs tickets for Friday’s game.” “Cool, wish I could go.” “Well, actually I have an extra ticket I have no use for, you’re welcome to come if you’d like.” After she agrees, then you run like hell and buy two adjacent tickets before they are sold out.
7. Subsequent follow up
Your execution of the initial move making operation will define if there is further opportunity or not. Keep it cool. Never appear needy at any point in the process. Never try to press the issue. Sometimes, too much attention can be counterproductive, and the application of such may require some remedial ignorance in order to salvage the campaign. When to take it to the physical level is dependent on dynamics and timing. Ideally, she will initiate contact. Failing that, it is best to wait until she is in a position of vulnerability before initiating physical contact.
Relationship maintenance: Note that I did not label that as item number eight. I’m entirely unqualified to provide advice and guidance in that area. You’re on your own from then on. When things go naturally South, just start at 1) and repeat the process.
Internet dating: I have a special aversion to Internet dating sites and dating services. You might as well just head down to the red light zone with a couple C notes and an eight ball if you're going to do that. That just takes all the game out of the game, and places you in some sort of awkward, overt dating scenario. Kind of like picking up roadkill off the freeway as opposed to tracking it down and hunting it. If your game is so bad you have to resort to an Internet dating site, move to freakin' Thailand for a while and get your confidence back up.
1. Physical and mental conditioning.
In order to be a true player, you have to approach the game with the proper mentality. Obviously, we know that guys of all levels of physical conditioning can achieve relationship status, but the more fit you are, there are more opportunities that will be available to you. Plus, a greater level of physical fitness inspires more confidence, which is an important asset in relationship development. The attitude that you must generally assume for the greatest level of success is “if something develops, it develops, if not, then NBFD.”
2. Setting
Relationships can develop in any given situation, and any given place. However, statistically, you will be more successful if you focus your efforts in target rich environments. Health clubs are arguably one of the best settings available for playing the game. Bars are, as well. Night clubs, not so much. Generally, you want relatively quiet surroundings, where you are able to have extended and repeated social interactions in a relatively non-competitive environment.
3. Establish your position
Scope out the area of operations. We will discuss the health club scenario first. Typically, one has a regimen of cardiovascular exercise coupled with resistance training. Cardio machines, such as treadmills, elliptical trainers and stair masters, are ideal positions for relationship development, as they put you in close proximity to others, over extended periods of time. Group exercise classes are also excellent venues as well, particularly since you have a more narrowed common interest (the particular group exercise) and more of a reason to initiate and continue casual conversations. In the bar setting, you want to be at a relatively uncrowded location, preferably at the end of the bar facing the door or open area so you can have a better target scan. Don’t sit at a table. Bar stools and chairs are also somewhat of a detractor in that they limit mobility.
4. Choose your target
In order to have the best probability of success, you have to track and engage multiple targets over a period of time prior to performing a move making operation. It is important to recognize that while some targets are more easily acquired than others, it may be worth while expend more effort on some than others. Selectivity is key, shotgun approaches generally are not only ineffective, but they can contaminate the zone of operations by causing you to be labeled as an overt player. Successful players are players on the inside. Unsuccessful players look like they are obviously macks. Certain targets can be ruled out categorically if they are: a) accompanied by a boyfriend, b) accompanied by a girlfriend, c) part of a small (5 person or less) group. Unaccompanied, lone targets are preferred. Note that b) or c) is not necessarily a deal killer, but it requires special dynamics – a wing man. A small group of two to five girls does NOT want your company.
5. Rules of engagement
Always, always keep conversations on a friendly, casual, neutral basis until you are ready to take the next step. The key is to develop a rapport, and establish a reason to have continued conversations. This will transition automatically in to the “friend zone”. It is critical to recognize when the “friend zone” has been achieved and sufficiently developed before progressing to the next level.
6. Conducting move making operations
The most difficult and critical task faced by the player is to move the relationship past the friend zone, once it has been established that the target has been sufficiently conditioned. The key here is to not make an abrupt transition, but to make a gradual one. The most successful players do not play the game in a stepped progression, but rather in a continuous uprising sloped curve. The slope of the relationship level/time curve is somewhat dependent on the skill of the player, and the properties of the target, such as relationship status, susceptibility, gullibility, and other dynamic factors. The initial move should be based on a common interest. But it's critically important it not be an overt move. You have to create a circumstance with credible deniability - one that gives you a way out if she declines. Say you both are huge San Antonio Spurs fans. Well you may not be but she is, and hence now you are. “Wow, check it out, my company gave me a couple Spurs tickets for Friday’s game.” “Cool, wish I could go.” “Well, actually I have an extra ticket I have no use for, you’re welcome to come if you’d like.” After she agrees, then you run like hell and buy two adjacent tickets before they are sold out.
7. Subsequent follow up
Your execution of the initial move making operation will define if there is further opportunity or not. Keep it cool. Never appear needy at any point in the process. Never try to press the issue. Sometimes, too much attention can be counterproductive, and the application of such may require some remedial ignorance in order to salvage the campaign. When to take it to the physical level is dependent on dynamics and timing. Ideally, she will initiate contact. Failing that, it is best to wait until she is in a position of vulnerability before initiating physical contact.
Relationship maintenance: Note that I did not label that as item number eight. I’m entirely unqualified to provide advice and guidance in that area. You’re on your own from then on. When things go naturally South, just start at 1) and repeat the process.
Internet dating: I have a special aversion to Internet dating sites and dating services. You might as well just head down to the red light zone with a couple C notes and an eight ball if you're going to do that. That just takes all the game out of the game, and places you in some sort of awkward, overt dating scenario. Kind of like picking up roadkill off the freeway as opposed to tracking it down and hunting it. If your game is so bad you have to resort to an Internet dating site, move to freakin' Thailand for a while and get your confidence back up.
:wink2:
