Stephen has me beat still, but I think I can get close.
When I was a strapping young 16 year old, I was very into cycling - competed in a bunch of local races and stuff, had a promising future until a rugby injury put paid to the cycling
...anyway...
One day my buddy and I and our 2 girlfriends at the time went on a long spring cycle ride, probably 10 miles or so (long for them, a breeze for me), and after we saw the girls home, we went our separate ways. I sprinted the last mile home and sat down for the family meal. Well, it soon became apparent that something wasn't right, and things began to get painful...after about 30 minutes, I couldn't stand it, and had my step-father come look at my right-testes...which was now about the size of a softball. Being a man of few words, he yelled at mother to come see, and between them decided I should immediately go an see the family doctor (Dr Purvis...or Pervy Purvis as we used to call him).
It gets worse...
15 mind shatteringly bumpy minutes later, we arrive at Dr Purvis's house, who basically tells me to get them out for him to see while stood in the middle of his livingroom. He takes one look, and says "You have a torsion...you need immediate surgery. " Mother decided to drive to the hospital (about 10 minutes) rather than call the ambulance as it would have been a wash. 30 minutes later, I was in the operating theatre, snip, clip and stitch, all sorted out. (you can read about the problem at
http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/diseases/facts/testiculartorsion.htm - it's apparently pretty common)
Thats not the embarrasing bit...stick with it.
4 weeks later, I was required to go back to the hospital for a couple of checks, one of which involved providing a sample in a plastic cup to ensure everything was still operating properly. Of course, I had to collect and return the cup to a helpful volunteer nurse. She just happened to be my buddy's girlfriend.
Needless to say, such news was then impossible to contain, and school the next day was pretty horrific - my name didn't help matters much
Don't even get me started on communal showers after a surgical shaving...