I have met the enemy and they are us..

ScottM

ScottM

Taxi to Parking
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iBazinga!
I was flying around Chicago airspace today. I was listening into Chi-App for situational awareness as I know better than to ask for FF on one of the busier days. I heard some of the poorest radio procedures from VFR GA flight that were requesting and being turned down for FF. I mean really if you are going to ask Chi-App you better have you act together, but some what I heard was really poor. For example.

1. Pilot: Chi-App Cessna 1234, VFR, on the lake front request ILS into Dupage
App: Say your position again?

Pilot: Chi-App we want the ILS
App: adn what is your position? I think you said Lake Front?

Pilot: Are you asking us?
App: Restate your position and request?

Pilot (a new voice from the same plane) Chi-App Cessna 1234, VFR, on the lake front request ILS into Dupage
App: You should be talking to Midway tower right now to transistion the corridor, contact them on 118.4 and remain clear of the class Bravo

2. Pilot: Chi-App Gruman 1234 request FF
App: unable FF

Pilot: Chi-App Gruman 1234 request FF
App: unable FF

Pilot: Chi-App Gruman 1234 request FF
App: unable FF, you can stop asking you are not going to get it

3. Pilot: Chi-App Bugsmasher 1234, at 5500 feet , um, is it possible, that we could get FF, we are heading to Rochester, and will go around the class B, then east to the CGT VOR, um, then, lets see which VOR, standby and I'll get you the route.

App: unable FF

4. Pilot: Chi-app Piper 1234 2 south of lewis climbing to 3500 request FF
App: Squawk 5231 say type aircraft and desitnation

(did you notice that one worked!!!)

Sorry for the little rant, but we sometimes sound like a bunch of shmoes when we flub radio calls like that.
 
smigaldi said:
I was flying around Chicago airspace today. I was listening into Chi-App for situational awareness as I know better than to ask for FF on one of the busier days. I heard some of the poorest radio procedures from VFR GA flight that were requesting and being turned down for FF. I mean really if you are going to ask Chi-App you better have you act together, but some what I heard was really poor. see which VOR, standby and I'll get you the route.

App: unable FF

4. Pilot: Chi-app Piper 1234 2 south of lewis climbing to 3500 request FF
App: Squawk 5231 say type aircraft and destination

(did you notice that one worked!!!)

Sorry for the little rant, but we sometimes sound like a bunch of shmoes when we flub radio calls like that.
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LOL! You made my week!!!! :p :p :p :p :p :goofy:

are you SURE, you heard Chicago ANSWER a VFR pilot? :goofy: :goofy: :goofy: :goofy: :goofy: :goofy: :goofy:

For your information I have made AIM-perfect calls on lazy Sunday mornings and never gotten an answer.
 
Well Scott it's all in the delivery, Maybe they should have said "Yo Chi-town we want FF can you do dat." (LOL) Dave G.
 
Chicago is lost. It might as well be Vietnam to us.
 
yep, we should change the catchphrase to We have met the enemy and they are Chicago Approach.
 
Shipoke said:
Well Scott it's all in the delivery, Maybe they should have said "Yo Chi-town we want FF can you do dat." (LOL) Dave G.
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I don't know maybe I am just being punchy today. There was a guy at Lansing who was anouncing on the CTAF, and this is verbatim:

Lansing traffic on downwidn, Lansing

Lansing traffic now on base, Lansing

Lansing Traffic on final, Lansing

Lansing traffic crossing 27 Lansing

Lansing traffic parking, Lansing

AND NEVER ONCE USED HIS N-number. AT LEAST HE USED HIS RADIO
 
smigaldi said:
I was flying around Chicago airspace today. I was listening into Chi-App for situational awareness as I know better than to ask for FF on one of the busier days. I heard some of the poorest radio procedures from VFR GA flight that were requesting and being turned down for FF. I mean really if you are going to ask Chi-App you better have you act together, but some what I heard was really poor. For example.!!!)

Sorry for the little rant, but we sometimes sound like a bunch of shmoes when we flub radio calls like
Click to expand...

I find out here in the west that the less I say the better results I get.

when I want FF from 76S to the north I usually just say.

(me) Fairchild 24 C19143 off 76S direct BLI.

(them) 19143 squawk ___________

(me) I dial it in and wait.

(them) 19143 raidar contact 1 mile east of 67S,,, 1200'

(me) altitude and position correct

(them) approved direct BLI contact BLI tower at Elisa Island.

(me) Wilco

I'm home free..

say less, mean more!
 
Shipoke said:
Well Scott it's all in the delivery, Maybe they should have said "Yo Chi-town we want FF can you do dat." (LOL) Dave G.
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;)
Da Bears!
 
hoo would win between da bears and da soviet union?
 
I'm really sorry y'all are having to deal with that around
Shy town. Things are quite a bit better here around D/FW; still, we have days one can't get on the frequency. Don't see much help for improvement the way funding is going for controllers and facilities.

Best,

Dave
 
smigaldi said:
I don't know maybe I am just being punchy today. There was a guy at Lansing who was anouncing on the CTAF, and this is verbatim:

Lansing traffic on downwidn, Lansing

Lansing traffic now on base, Lansing

Lansing Traffic on final, Lansing

Lansing traffic crossing 27 Lansing

Lansing traffic parking, Lansing

AND NEVER ONCE USED HIS N-number. AT LEAST HE USED HIS RADIO
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Stealth aircraft.

I had an ultralight doing similar calls. While he did identify the type of craft, it came out as a mumble. I'm looking at the runway trying to find him and just spot him landing on the grass. Fine position report except it really wasn't.
 
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Who would win between Di'ka and a hurricane?

Di'ka.

Ah, but de hurricane is named Di'ka.
 
N2212R said:
Who would win between Di'ka and a hurricane?

Di'ka.

Ah, but de hurricane is named Di'ka.
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I love that sketch. Its the funnies thing Farley ever did.

Scott. Grumman is spelled with two m's.

I agree, I hear a lot of moronic stuff on the radio. Just this past weekend I heard a Cirrus say these very words.......AOTITAPA. Ahhhhhh!
 
smigaldi said:
I don't know maybe I am just being punchy today. There was a guy at Lansing who was anouncing on the CTAF, and this is verbatim:

Lansing traffic on downwidn, Lansing

Lansing traffic now on base, Lansing

Lansing Traffic on final, Lansing

Lansing traffic crossing 27 Lansing

Lansing traffic parking, Lansing

AND NEVER ONCE USED HIS N-number. AT LEAST HE USED HIS RADIO
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Scott, I don't actually have a problem with him not using his tail number. The field where I learned to fly fixed-wing was extremely busy and to save bandwidth, nobody gave a tail number.

What I do have a problem with is that he didn't identify his a/c type, so you have no clue as to how fast he is or how wide a pattern he's flying.

I still use a tail number at an untowered field only if there is another Robinson in the pattern. If there are no other helicopters around, I just say:

myfield traffic, helicopter is right downwind 27, myfield.

If there's another helicopter, but not a Robinson, then I'll use "Robinson" rather that just "helicopter". If there's another Robinson, then I'll use the last three digits of my tailk number.
 
Wow. I just got in and out of ORD, (IFR of course) on the ILS 22R. I must've said like twelve words from the time I was handed off to approach to when I was given Taxi instruction.

170 kts. to the inner marker, two dots low, Nose high slip, out comes the gear.....flaps....GUMPS....chirp/chirp. Only then do I realize that due to taxiway closures I should have landed fast/long.

Outtada-way!

Getting out was painless, and who did I hear on freq...
"Hi Bruce"
"Thanks for the Popcorn....(her birthday was last week)"
That was my ERAU mentee, who was then our 14 y.o. babysitter, from 1992....flying a Canadair RJ :)

Small world.
 
While doing my regular job of running drugs during the night, my second favorite entertainment after talk radio is listening to JFK tower via internet access in the car. I've even come to have a favorite controller to listen to. Yes, I know mental health counseling may be in order but it's just the nature of always having your head in IMC. :)

I crack up at some of the funny interchanges. But, I'm equally entertained by a controller attempting to get that "professional pilot" to understand the instructions given. It's a safe bet there isn't a single Class B primary airport without the airport diagram stating "READBACK OF ALL RUNWAY HOLDING INSTRUCTIONS IS REQUIRED". But, it's amazing the number of times I hear a controller repeat themselves two to four times before he/she can get the pilot to read back hold short instructions. :hairraise:

Other times, there may be twenty to thirty aircraft awaiting departure while just as many are being vectored for parallel approaches with less than a minute between each. Even so, a pilot will request to sidestep to the parallel. Immediately after "Unable" by the controller, the next approaching aircraft will request the same.

The one I really wonder about is the aircraft who have been in line for departure for thirty minutes or so then announce they have to return to the gate for fuel. One would think dispatchers would build this wait time into fuel calculations. :confused: I did hear a female pilot state if they weren't off the ground in the next twenty-five minutes they would have to return for fuel. That proved quite effective as they were moved for an intersection departure only ten minutes later.

Other times, aircraft landing on 22L will pile up awaiting to cross 22R and proceeding to their gate. One evening, the controller had to tell them to expedite in order to get several across 22R before the next approach is on short final. As he cleared four aircraft to cross in short order, one pilot keyed up with, "Meep meep!" The controller responded with a chuckle and said, "Exactly!"

Many will buy a radio from me for the purpose of listening to aircraft and ATC for improving communication skills. I highly recommend LiveATC.net. It's a great way to finish the day after Boortz, Rush, Hannity and Levin! :cheerswine:

Blue Skys!

Ken
 
I second Scott's advice. I flew doen the lakeshore over Thanksgiving, and got FF all the way around the south end of MDW into Clow (I chickened out of the Eisenhower transition). I realize that the traffic volume was probably pretty light, but short crisp ATC comms will get you gelp from Chi center. Just don't expect to go through the ORD Bravo or MDW charlie without good reason.

Pete
 
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