He's Terminal :(

p8cleared2land

p8cleared2land

Pre-takeoff checklist
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p8cleared2land
With a heavy travel schedule for August, "terminal" just meant "a crowded place where you ignore the masses while trying to find the correct rental car counter." And now, at the end of August, the word has an entirely different meaning. We were walking into a restaurant in MA with two of my husband's business clients when he received The Dreaded Phone Call from his doctor. He has squamous cell esophageal cancer. Contrary to statistics, he's never smoked, drinks rarely, and is white. At the beginning of the month, he was strong. Now he is weak and receives much of his calories through a feeding tube.

I have no soppy advice about not taking things for granted. We've always approached life as an adventure, and things have a way of changing quickly sometimes. And sometimes the bleakest situations change again for the positive. Hopefully "terminal" will be just a crowded place again.
 
p8cleared2land said:
With a heavy travel schedule for August, "terminal" just meant "a crowded place where you ignore the masses while trying to find the correct rental car counter." And now, at the end of August, the word has an entirely different meaning. We were walking into a restaurant in MA with two of my husband's business clients when he received The Dreaded Phone Call from his doctor. He has squamous cell esophageal cancer. Contrary to statistics, he's never smoked, drinks rarely, and is white. At the beginning of the month, he was strong. Now he is weak and receives much of his calories through a feeding tube.

I have no soppy advice about not taking things for granted. We've always approached life as an adventure, and things have a way of changing quickly sometimes. And sometimes the bleakest situations change again for the positive. Hopefully "terminal" will be just a crowded place again.
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I will keep you and your husband in my thoughts. We are making inroads against cancer every single day - I admire your strength and your outlook, and I hope someday we can rid ourselves of this scourge.

Best,

-Andrew
 
You have my prayers. Not being a MD, I guess I always wonder how these things can just "pop up". No signs, no signals?

If you are a believer, then "terminal" still has the meaning of going to a place to start an adventure. Hopefully the line is long, and while he waits it won't be bad - after all, you are there with him. Maybe the big ticket agent will find that his journey is not ready to start yet. As long as there is hope, there is a chance.

May your God give you the strength you need. I can't think of anything more appropriate.
 
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Mary and I will keep you both in our thoughts and prayers, we wish you continued strength in the times ahead.

Hope to hear of your husband hanging out at that "place where you ignore the masses while trying to find the correct rental car counter" soon.

Gary & Mary
 
P8 the only advice I can give is be strong and have hope! I will keep both you and your husband in my prayers. May G-d grant you and yours comfort and peace.
 
You have my thoughts and prayers. After my dad's heart issues this spring, I keep hope and prayers that there will be successful cures for diseases such as cancer, MS, and heart disease.

Best wishes from here, and hopes for the best.
 
I'm sorry to hear that, P8. My thoughts and prayers are with you
and your husband as you deal with this.

RT
 
Petra my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

I pray for comfort and strength for you and yours.
 
p8cleared2land said:
I have no soppy advice about not taking things for granted. We've always approached life as an adventure, and things have a way of changing quickly sometimes. And sometimes the bleakest situations change again for the positive. Hopefully "terminal" will be just a crowded place again.
Click to expand...

Petra,

In the face of such adversity, I really admire your positive attitude. I'm sure it does wonders for your husband as well. He's a lucky guy to have you. Cherish the time you were given to deal with this together. T&P to you both.
 
Petra, check your inbox. I'm so sorry to hear this. So very sorry.

Thoughts and prayers for you both, always.
 
Thank you all. Pure bias I'm sure, but pilots as a whole seem to have a solid grasp on the heavy things in life, which allows them to sort out the fluff from the granite and soar above it all.

And Mari makes me laugh. :)

Petra
 
Petra, I am so sorry to hear about what you and your husband are going through. This must be very, very tough for all of you. I imagine that this has taken over your life now, and takes an incredible amount of strength and courage to deal with.

p8cleared2land said:
I have no soppy advice about not taking things for granted. We've always approached life as an adventure, and things have a way of changing quickly sometimes. And sometimes the bleakest situations change again for the positive. Hopefully "terminal" will be just a crowded place again.
Click to expand...
By your sharing your situation, you have reminded us all how quickly things can change for any of us. Life is short and precious and we should live with no regrets for things not done and things not said to those we care for.

I will be thinking of you and your family. I have worked as a nurse for many years...some of that time in home health and am presently working part time at an oncology clinic. Let me if you ever need to talk, or if you need a long distance hug.
 
Petra;
Prayers for comfort, peace and hope for healing from our family to yours. We all need to live each day as if it could be our last, and not leave the important things undone, the hugs of family, floating a fly down just one more pool, taking just one more lap around the pattern in order to watch the sunset...
Greg
 
Petra,

I'm late to the game, but I add my good thoughts and long distance hugs for you and your family.

Missa
 
p8cleared2land said:
With a heavy travel schedule for August, "terminal" just meant "a crowded place where you ignore the masses while trying to find the correct rental car counter." And now, at the end of August, the word has an entirely different meaning. We were walking into a restaurant in MA with two of my husband's business clients when he received The Dreaded Phone Call from his doctor. He has squamous cell esophageal cancer. Contrary to statistics, he's never smoked, drinks rarely, and is white. At the beginning of the month, he was strong. Now he is weak and receives much of his calories through a feeding tube.

I have no soppy advice about not taking things for granted. We've always approached life as an adventure, and things have a way of changing quickly sometimes. And sometimes the bleakest situations change again for the positive. Hopefully "terminal" will be just a crowded place again.
Click to expand...

Bummer deal, but not much to do except like Stevie Miller says" Got to keep on keeping on, you know I might get rich, you know I might get busted." Just take it as it comes and try to keep a smile is about all you can do.
 
It's been a month since your posting, and I hope that the fight to make every day count continues and that you've had this little bit of time to say and hear all of the things that need to have been said. My thoughts are with you.
 
Sending good thoughts and hugs. I'm sorry...must have missed the original post in my moving frenzy.

terry
 
An update:

He's feeling better lately (a good thing.) He has gained weight (another good thing--he'd lost 25 lb in a two week period when he was initially diagnosed. The nurse at his dr appointment today showed me a picture from that week. I would have sworn it wasn't my husband.) He is bald, but he looks pretty hot bald, so that is ok. They said he will lose his eyelashes and eyebrows...I'm not sure that is going to look so great.

All in all, he's feeling good. We're past the initial shock, and understand that there is much left to go through--his prognosis hasn't changed. There are so many small things that come up. He is still weak. We were walking a couple of days ago and I looked back to see that he'd fallen down. There is a split second to make a decision as you watch his humiliation and frustration: Do I pretend I didn't see that? Do I go help him up?

Thank you, thank you for all your kind responses. It really helps to know there are people listening! Special thanks also to the dear friend who puts up with my moodiness. :)
 
Though we've never met, please be assured that I think of you often in my prayers.

Jim
 
Do you pretend...? Do you go ...?

Just ask him what he wants and how he wants you to do it - and then be prepared if he gets testy, no matter what you do. It's a hard time for him, 24/7 (which you know) and that makes stuff unpredictable. Then give him a hug when he's able to accept one. ;)
 
Petra, I have often thought about you and your husband. How are you doing?
 
oh god, you are in my thoughts. lost my mom to ovarian cancer when i was young. this sucks! i hope that your hubby is doing great. I learned from my dad that it is very important to have a very supporting spouse during times like this, i have no doubt he is glad to have you. remember that you have a great network of people supporting you through this!
 
Your husband is still in my heart and my prayers.
 
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I work my asset off to try and beat cancer, and we do make inroads here and there. Your story makes me remember that there is much more to do. Good luck.
 
Petra, it's an awful way to go. All I can say, I know you guys will do the best you can. You can't do any more that the best you can.
 
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