Got a laugh in traffic this morning.

K

kyleb

Final Approach
Joined
Jun 13, 2008
Messages
7,554
Location
Marietta, GA
Display Name
Display name:
Drake the Outlaw
Dropped my son at school this morning and was headed towards towards town on a fairly busy 2 lane road with a center turning lane. About a quarter mile from a major intersection, a maroon SUV chose to pass another car by using the middle (turn lane). The car being passed accelerated and the SUV really cut its re-entry back into a legit traffic lane close in front of the car to avoid a looming median. All the while I'm thinking "Idiots. The light in 300 yards is red, traffic is backed up, and there's zero to be gained by any of the clownery."

So, I pulled up behind the two cars at the light. Inevitably, they were side by side (3 legal lanes at that point), windows down, and were shouting at each other (I could only hear the voices, not the words). Better yet, they were throwing things at each other. I saw lipstick, a comb, a drink, and a couple of other things go back and forth.

I so wanted to get a look at both of the idiots, but couldn't. I thought I might get a look at the driver of the SUV - it turned in the same direction I did, but sped off at 70+ in what I think is a 45 or 55 zone.

Anyway, the lunacy of people behind the wheel gave me a chuckle this morning.
 
The favorite one of those I saw was I was on the way to work on a snowy road. There was a car, maintaining a safe speed coming toward me and it apparently was annoying the guy behind it. Finally, the guy swings out into my lane to pass and either because he saw me or (more likely) he decided to "show" the slow poke, whipped it sharply back into the lane immediately in front of the slower car. Unfortunately, that manouver sent his car out of control and off the road so hard into a snow drift that he was unable to open his doors.
 
Had one here a few years ago that was determined to get in front of me (obviously I was leaving too much following distance) so he came tearing around me and whipped in between me and the car I was following only to find that the car I was following was stopping faster than he could. I came to a stop and watched him plow into the car in front of him & push that car into the truck in front of it. He sat in the car on his cell phone while the others got out to see what had happened.

No one appeared to be injured and it took all the energy I could muster to hold my peace and not ask him, "how'd that work out for ya?" :dunno:
 
kyleb said:
Dropped my son at school this morning and was headed towards towards town on a fairly busy 2 lane road with a center turning lane. About a quarter mile from a major intersection, a maroon SUV chose to pass another car by using the middle (turn lane). The car being passed accelerated and the SUV really cut its re-entry back into a legit traffic lane close in front of the car to avoid a looming median. All the while I'm thinking "Idiots. The light in 300 yards is red, traffic is backed up, and there's zero to be gained by any of the clownery."

So, I pulled up behind the two cars at the light. Inevitably, they were side by side (3 legal lanes at that point), windows down, and were shouting at each other (I could only hear the voices, not the words). Better yet, they were throwing things at each other. I saw lipstick, a comb, a drink, and a couple of other things go back and forth.

I so wanted to get a look at both of the idiots, but couldn't. I thought I might get a look at the driver of the SUV - it turned in the same direction I did, but sped off at 70+ in what I think is a 45 or 55 zone.

Anyway, the lunacy of people behind the wheel gave me a chuckle this morning.
Click to expand...

no no no. You don't understand. they were exchangins things they picked up by mistake

car 1: I think you have my lipstick.

car 2: oh, right, here is it... do you have my eyeliner?

car 1: yup, here you go...

and so...
 
My chuckle came yesterday on my way home. Not an idiot, as I rarely find them amusing. This was a Mustang GT, painted that nice bright blue Ford uses on them, with white wheels and a white top.

The license plate? "GTSMURF"

:)
 
FormerHangie said:
you never know if they might start shooting
Click to expand...
I was in the drive through at Taco Bell the other week. Some druggie looking guy was walking towards me, making eye contact. I had my 38 special in my pocket, so I took it out. When he got close enough to see it, he stopped and went away.

Now understand with the reservations close by, we get first Americans that drink up all their government supplied cash, then wander the parking lots asking for a dollar. They are easily recognized, and usually a quick wave of a hand and they leave. But this guy wasn't a first American.
 
kyleb said:
Dropped my son at school this morning and was headed towards towards town on a fairly busy 2 lane road with a center turning lane. About a quarter mile from a major intersection, a maroon SUV chose to pass another car by using the middle (turn lane). The car being passed accelerated and the SUV really cut its re-entry back into a legit traffic lane close in front of the car to avoid a looming median. All the while I'm thinking "Idiots. The light in 300 yards is red, traffic is backed up, and there's zero to be gained by any of the clownery."

So, I pulled up behind the two cars at the light. Inevitably, they were side by side (3 legal lanes at that point), windows down, and were shouting at each other (I could only hear the voices, not the words). Better yet, they were throwing things at each other. I saw lipstick, a comb, a drink, and a couple of other things go back and forth.

I so wanted to get a look at both of the idiots, but couldn't. I thought I might get a look at the driver of the SUV - it turned in the same direction I did, but sped off at 70+ in what I think is a 45 or 55 zone.

Anyway, the lunacy of people behind the wheel gave me a chuckle this morning.
Click to expand...

We had a tradeshow in town this week. At our company-hosted event in midtown one evening, the out-of-towners were sharing their newly acquired stories of traveling among the ATL-iens. I lost count of how many times I said "Welcome to Atlanta." I also lost count of how many times I heard someone say "Look! I can see the hotel (or GWCC) from here, but the Uber ride was 45 minutes!".......'Welcome to Atlanta.'
 
Zeldman said:
I was in the drive through at Taco Bell the other week. Some druggie looking guy was walking towards me, making eye contact. I had my 38 special in my pocket, so I took it out. When he got close enough to see it, he stopped and went away.

Now understand with the reservations close by, we get first Americans that drink up all their government supplied cash, then wander the parking lots asking for a dollar. They are easily recognized, and usually a quick wave of a hand and they leave. But this guy wasn't a first American.
Click to expand...

I was exiting the parking deck from the airport recently late-ish on a Friday night and the pay-as-you-exit booths were a mess. Folks were really struggling with the apparently overly complicated "Insert card now" voice prompts. Eventually, I got up to do my part, though I had already paid via the app, so once the camera read my license plate, the gate arm went up. Unfortunately, the bozo in front of me decided to stop literally 5 feet outside the gate and had me (and the other 5+ cars behind me) blocked. After a long week of work travel and dealing with typical big airport idiocy that day, I was over it. I honked at him and he started yelling at me "Hold up hold up" while holding his pants up with one hand while walking to apparently go talk to one of the parking attendants. I rolled down my window and asked if he wanted me to push it out of the way (I'm in a Silverado and he's in a rag-top Camaro). He looked at me said "Do it! Do it!" then started walking toward me. My "I'm over it" kicked in and I started to open my door to share my "I'm over it" state of mind with him when he realized that I am not a 'small' person and decided it was best for him to move his car.

The world is full of stooges. sigh.
 
There’s an intersection I used to drive every day. 2 lanes go through the light, but on the other side of the light the right lane becomes a right turn lane (it’s since been widened). It was very common to see someone in the left lane realize they needed to get over one lane to the right, and that was usually when the light was red. Option one: when the light turns green, go through gently with your right turn signal on and pull in behind the car in the right lane. Option 2: drag race through the intersection and get in front of the car already in the right lane.

One morning I was in that right lane and the light turned red. The car next to me had hoped to race around me but got caught by the red light and stopped quickly, but was still too far into the intersection. She backed up just far enough to get clear, but I still had a good view of her tail lights. And the reverse lights were still on. I thought to myself, “Self, this might be interesting.” Sure enough, when the light turned green she tried to race me through the intersection but she was still in reverse. Fortunately, the car behind her had stopped well back and didn’t get hit.
 
CJones said:
We had a tradeshow in town this week. At our company-hosted event in midtown one evening, the out-of-towners were sharing their newly acquired stories of traveling among the ATL-iens. I lost count of how many times I said "Welcome to Atlanta." I also lost count of how many times I heard someone say "Look! I can see the hotel (or GWCC) from here, but the Uber ride was 45 minutes!".......'Welcome to Atlanta.'
Click to expand...
My favorite is going from my house down Route 16 to Charlotte. You pass a two signs in short order. Once says "Welcome to Charlotte" and the other says "Charlotte 10."
 
Sounds like you are describing this:


I'm not a fan of the current SNL, but this one is pretty good.
 
flyingron said:
The favorite one of those I saw was I was on the way to work on a snowy road. There was a car, maintaining a safe speed coming toward me and it apparently was annoying the guy behind it. Finally, the guy swings out into my lane to pass and either because he saw me or (more likely) he decided to "show" the slow poke, whipped it sharply back into the lane immediately in front of the slower car. Unfortunately, that manouver sent his car out of control and off the road so hard into a snow drift that he was unable to open his doors.
Click to expand...
I would say that was fortunate, not unfortunate, that he slung himself off the snowy road. He removed himself from the potential of harming another person.
 
CJones said:
I was exiting the parking deck from the airport recently late-ish on a Friday night and the pay-as-you-exit booths were a mess. Folks were really struggling with the apparently overly complicated "Insert card now" voice prompts. Eventually, I got up to do my part, though I had already paid via the app, so once the camera read my license plate, the gate arm went up. Unfortunately, the bozo in front of me decided to stop literally 5 feet outside the gate and had me (and the other 5+ cars behind me) blocked. After a long week of work travel and dealing with typical big airport idiocy that day, I was over it. I honked at him and he started yelling at me "Hold up hold up" while holding his pants up with one hand while walking to apparently go talk to one of the parking attendants. I rolled down my window and asked if he wanted me to push it out of the way (I'm in a Silverado and he's in a rag-top Camaro). He looked at me said "Do it! Do it!" then started walking toward me. My "I'm over it" kicked in and I started to open my door to share my "I'm over it" state of mind with him when he realized that I am not a 'small' person and decided it was best for him to move his car.

The world is full of stooges. sigh.
Click to expand...
I would have started creeping up to his bumper getting ready to push... he comes towards my door... time to start pushing.
 
Daleandee said:
Had one here a few years ago that was determined to get in front of me (obviously I was leaving too much following distance) so he came tearing around me and whipped in between me and the car I was following only to find that the car I was following was stopping faster than he could. I came to a stop and watched him plow into the car in front of him & push that car into the truck in front of it. He sat in the car on his cell phone while the others got out to see what had happened.

No one appeared to be injured and it took all the energy I could muster to hold my peace and not ask him, "how'd that work out for ya?" :dunno:
Click to expand...

Roll window down,"Excuse me! You can't park there!":lol:
 
EdFred said:
That is mathematically possible. Justlike the average human has less than 2 legs.
Click to expand...
Sure it's possible. 100% of a given group could think that. That doesn't mean it's true.
 
EdFred said:
It's actually possible. Not the thanking part, it being actually possible.
Click to expand...

would it be more accurate to say that on average humans has less than 2 legs?

just idle muttering...
 
Charlie Golf said:
Sure it's possible. 100% of a given group could think that. That doesn't mean it's true.
Click to expand...
Like @EdFred says, this actually is mathematically possible, and it's really easy to demonstrate. Could be IQ, grades, income, golf score, batting average, anything.

If 10 drivers were scored on their driving skills from 1-10, and 9 got a 6 and 1 got a 5, well, the average is 5.9, therefore 90% of drivers scored above average.

And yes, similarly, something 99.9...% of people have more than the average number of legs. Statistics are fun.

That's using the common definition of "average", which is the arithmetic mean. The other versions of "average", median and mode, have their own fallacies.
 
EdFred said:
It's actually possible. Not the thanking part, it being actually possible.
Click to expand...
not only possible, but quite likely. I expect majority(although I doubt it's 75+%) of drivers to be above average.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top