Let'sgoflying!
Touchdown! Greaser!
> Blonde LOGIC
> Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench
> talking........ and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you
> think
> is farther away..........Florida or the moon?"
>
> The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see
> Florida..?????"
>
> CAR TROUBLE
> A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the
> mechanic it died.
>
> After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
>
> She says, "What's the story?"
>
> He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
>
> She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
>
> SPEEDING TICKET
> A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very
> nicely if he could see her license.
>
> She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act
> together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today
> you
> expect me to show it to you!"
>
> RIVER WALK
> There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river
> and sees
> another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts,
> "How can
> I get to the other side?"
>
> The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and
> shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."
>
>
> AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE
> A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and
> said
> that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
>
> "Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."
>
> The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left breast and
> screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed in even more. She
> pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and
> screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.
>
> The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?
>
> "Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."
>
> "I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."
>
> KNITTING
> A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the
> freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the
> blonde
> behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious
> to his
> flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window,
> turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
>
> "NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
>
> BLONDE ON THE SUN
> A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The
> Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We
> were the first on the moon!"
>
> The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the
> sun!"
>
> The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their
> heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!"
> said
> the Russian.
>
> To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're
> going at night!"
>
> IN A VACUUM
> A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her
> turn.
> She rolled the dice and she landed on Science &Nature. Her question
> was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can
> you hear
> it?"
>
> She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
>
> FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
> A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two
> new
> dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by
> saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.
>
> Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like
> that?"
>
> "HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs!"
>
> Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench
> talking........ and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you
> think
> is farther away..........Florida or the moon?"
>
> The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see
> Florida..?????"
>
> CAR TROUBLE
> A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the
> mechanic it died.
>
> After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
>
> She says, "What's the story?"
>
> He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
>
> She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
>
> SPEEDING TICKET
> A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very
> nicely if he could see her license.
>
> She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act
> together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today
> you
> expect me to show it to you!"
>
> RIVER WALK
> There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river
> and sees
> another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts,
> "How can
> I get to the other side?"
>
> The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and
> shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."
>
>
> AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE
> A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and
> said
> that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
>
> "Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."
>
> The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left breast and
> screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed in even more. She
> pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and
> screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.
>
> The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?
>
> "Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."
>
> "I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."
>
> KNITTING
> A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the
> freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the
> blonde
> behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious
> to his
> flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window,
> turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
>
> "NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
>
> BLONDE ON THE SUN
> A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The
> Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We
> were the first on the moon!"
>
> The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the
> sun!"
>
> The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their
> heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!"
> said
> the Russian.
>
> To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're
> going at night!"
>
> IN A VACUUM
> A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her
> turn.
> She rolled the dice and she landed on Science &Nature. Her question
> was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can
> you hear
> it?"
>
> She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
>
> FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
> A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two
> new
> dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by
> saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.
>
> Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like
> that?"
>
> "HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs!"
>
