2305 miles... (long)

jesse

Touchdown! Greaser!
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Jesse
Please excuse any mistakes in grammar. I haven't proof read this.

Minnesota to Mississippi
1109 miles
Minnesota, Iowa, Missouri, Arkansas, Tennessee, Mississippi

I left Minnesota not really knowing what to expect. My bike isn’t exactly built for touring. It has a pretty short range and no cargo capacity. Although it is twenty one years old and cosmetically in rough shape there is not a part on that bike that I haven’t either taken apart or replaced. I was confident the bike would make the trip if I could.

I left Friday afternoon/evening and had traveled about five miles before I was almost killed. I was on a road with three or four lanes in moderate traffic. I was in the center lane and there was a SUV on my left side and a truck on my right side. All of the sudden the SUV jumps into my lane with no warning. Now I’m between the vehicles on the centerline. I took a look in my mirror and there were several vehicles behind me. I quickly dropped the gears and brought the engine to redline at 11,000 RPM. When you do this you can pretty much count on any vehicle around you instantly disappearing. It’s comforting.

One thing that had really never been too much of an issue for me previously was the range of my bike. Normally I never really rode much further then 100 miles. This trip required that I make several fuel stops (over twenty). Every gas station I’d see I would have to look at my trip meter and make a go/no-go decision. I couldn’t afford to lose hours by running out of gas. I was racing against the clock.

My first fuel stop was just north of the Iowa border in Albert Lea, Minnesota. I didn’t even get off the motorcycle. Just rode up and swiped my credit card and was back on the interstate minutes later. The majority of my fuel stops were handled in the same manner.

Several fuel stops later I was in southern Iowa. I went into the gas station and it was at this point I realized how far I’m actually going. Already people had changed. By the way…There are more rednecks in southern Iowa then Mississippi.

I jumped back on the interstate and continued south. Don’t ask me which interstate because honestly I don’t know. When you go this far the details become a blur. A few hours later around sunset I hit the Missouri border. The most encouraging thing on a trip like this is crossing states. You don’t dare think about the total distance you just keep thinking about the next state.

I don’t really recall much more about the trip until I hit St. Louis Missouri. I was getting low on gas and was feeling pretty desperate. I took an exit and just rode around until I found a gas station that was open. I filled my gas tank up at the pump and decided that I should buy something to drink. I walked inside to see a girl running the counter weighing in at about 80 pounds. Bruises and track marks all over her. There were several fairly large guys that didn’t look quite right hanging out in the gas station. All of them stared at me when I walked in. I simply walked back out and got the hell out of there. It was at this point that I realized I’m going to have to be somewhat careful about where I stop… The further south I go the more I stand out as a ‘tourist’.

When you make a trip like this it’s pretty easy to judge how far you can go before you drop. When you first start out you are feeling strong and just looking at the scenery. Eventually you focus your attention on the trip meter. This is the stage to where you become extremely bored and start to invent “stupid biker tricks”. I’ve mastered the following:

1.)[FONT=&quot] [/FONT]Sending text messages while on the interstate.
2.)[FONT=&quot] [/FONT]Reading the news on my cell phone.
3.)[FONT=&quot] [/FONT]Several other things I won’t admit.

After this state of being extremely bored you move onto the slightly tired stage. This is where I start to talk to myself, invent really stupid songs, etc. I can do this for several hours before I get too tired to talk to myself. After this point it would probably be a good idea to stop and rest. If you don’t the next stage is where you can no longer make sense of what you are looking at. You confuse tail lights up ahead and start to panic as you don’t understand them. Etc.

I was reaching the point to where things weren’t making any sense. I was in Missouri south of St. Louis. I finally decided I better stop. I honestly have no idea where I ended up stopping. I just took an exit and slept on my bike in the parking lot of some gas station. About two hours later I woke up and went inside and was looking for something to eat. There weren’t many options and I chose an egg sandwich. I only ate about half of it and continued on south.

I started to feel a little disoriented but I just assumed that it was from a lack of sleep. But I just kept on rolling and the miles kept on going by. I was getting pretty excited as I was on track for a Saturday morning arrival.

The Nighthawk was carrying me at a sporting pace through Arkansas and all of the sudden the engine quit. I looked down at my trip meter confused. I had only traveled 90 miles. In a move of desperation I reached for the fuel valve and turned it to ‘Reserve’ the engine came back. I discovered the hard way how bad my mileage was in higher speed range. I figured I had maybe 15 or 20 miles of fuel left on reserve and started looking for a gas station in desperation. Nothing. I was starting to read mile markers so I would know where I was at when I make my phone call to a tow company to bring me gas. Off in the distance I finally see civilization. As I take the exit my bike starts to cough which means that I could have probably made it another mile.

I walked inside this gas station and still have no idea what the girl running the gas station counter said to me. From this point on my chance of comprehending what was being said to me quickly diminished. I was entering the south.


Another one or two hundred miles later I reached Memphis, TN. A few more miles and I crossed into Mississippi. I was really not feeling well at this point. I was pretty sure that I only had about four hours left and would be able to make it. I was wrong.

All of the sudden I started to feel very disoriented and felt like I was going to throw up. One thing I did not want to experience was throwing up inside my helmet so I pulled over on the side of the interstate and out came a LOT of Gatorade and what little I have ate. I knew at this point that I needed to stop somewhere and quick. I took the exit for the next town and walked inside the first motel to see if they had a room. They did but they would not give it to me since I was not 21 years old. At this point I was barely even able to walk straight and went on to the next motel…Same story. Finally the fourth motel I checked gave me a room. It was now about 9am my plan was only to stay for about three hours. A few hours later I realized that I was done, there was simply no way I’d be able to continue.

This was the only point in the trip that I felt discouraged. I had traveled so far to come short. Anything that I would eat or drink would instantly be thrown up. My eyes were completely red and bloodshot and I couldn’t quit shaking. Keep in mind I was shaking in a room with an air conditioner that barely worked in the summer heat of Mississippi. I was evaluating all of my options to figure out how I was going to make it back to work in time. I had one chance to make this trip work and that relied on me continuing on Sunday morning. If I didn’t feel good Sunday morning I was going to call a taxi to a hospital and fly back commercial. I felt so sick and was so disoriented that I was unable to even walk to a vending machine.

Around 1AM I was able to drink some Gatorade and keep it down. The entire night I just slowly drank liquids trying to recover. I woke up the next morning around 7am still feeling like crap but able to walk and hold down liquids. So I continued on.

I had about three and a half hours left to Steve’s house. It was HOT and I was still sick. I had to stop about every 50 miles as I simply couldn’t take anymore.

On this last leg of the journey I stopped for gas and there were a group of weekend warrior Harley guys watching me. They had their nice pretty shiny new bikes with probably a total of 100 miles on them. I parked so my “Minnesota” plate would be right in their face. Once I climbed off I went to put the bike on the center stand and I just straight up dropped it. My ego hit the ground with the bike and I quickly picked it back up, filled up, and got the hell out of there. Lesson: If you are too dizzy to walk right, don’t try to put a bike on the center stand.

This was the final leg of the journey. I wouldn’t have to stop for gas again. All I have to do is survive the last leg and I can say I made it. Eventually I went through Jackson Mississippi. Several of the lanes through Jackson had just been freshly resurfaced with tar and I couldn’t stand to ride on those lanes as the heat coming off of them was cooking me. I had to go to the far right lane and you wouldn’t believe the difference that made.

After Jackson Mississippi I finally reached the exit that would take me off of Interstate 55. I gave Steve a phone call and he informed me that was a thunderstorm a few miles away. I quickly jumped back on my bike and actually had CURVES on a road for the first time the entire trip. After a few miles I finally ran into the thunderstorm and was getting poured on. I loved the rain and finally the heat went away. I was starting to feel much better but encountered a problem.

The roads were not labeled well and I couldn’t really read them at all in the rain. I reset my trip meter at each turn and would simply turn based on the distance on my trip meter. It was surprising how accurate Map Quest was. I was in the “middle-of-nowhere” and crossing my fingers that I was going to the right place.

Eventually I turned into a driveway and slowly approached the house and there was Steve with the camera. I had crossed the country on a fairing-less, short range, twenty one year old motorcycle. I was completely drenched, tired, and still feeling slightly sick. But I had made it… It’s a great feeling.



Mississippi
31 hours

Steve was kind enough to give me a tour of that area of Mississippi. It really is a completely different world down there and is a nice change of scenery compared to Minneapolis. After a few hours I was feeling much better and was able to eat food.

Somehow during the trip down there my rear tire took some damage in the form of a large gash. It was pretty entertaining I’m sure to watch me try to call motorcycle shops as it is like I am speaking a completely different language. I was able to locate a tire in a motorcycle shop in Jackson, MS. It was a used non-dealer motorcycle shop that was obviously oriented towards customer service vs. selling new bikes. It’s nice to see that those exist. I’ve never ran into one like that. They mounted the tire on my rim for $5.

If you plan on spending much time down there you really are going to need a local translator as I can’t understand the majority of the people whatsoever.

While I was there it was obvious that I would run into some rain on the trip back. I really didn’t want to think about that though as there isn’t much you can do except ride through it. I had lost some serious time on the way down here and couldn’t stay long. Unfortunately Monday evening approached and if I had any chance of making it back by Tuesday night I had to start heading north.



Mississippi to Minnesota
1196 miles
Mississippi, Tennessee, Arkansas, Missouri, Illinois, Wisconsin, Minnesota

The time had come and I had to leave. As much as I would have liked to delay a day it wasn’t an option. The Nighthawk started back up and seemed willing to make the journey. I jumped back on I-55 and this time chose the onramp that said “North”.

I made a fuel stop somewhere north of Jackson Mississippi and another in Memphis Tennessee. I was making decent time and simply not thinking whatsoever about how many miles home I had.

Eventually I hit the Missouri border and started to feel tired. Keep in mind I had not really slept more then 4 hours a night in the last four days. I stopped at a gas station and topped off with gas along with a large bag of sugar coated gummy worms. I stuffed as many of them in my mouth as I could and jumped back on the interstate.

After a few hundred miles or so I crossed to the east side of the Mississippi river into Illinois. This is when I started to hit some rain. I was cold and tired and checked into a motel for three hours to warm up and catch two hours of sleep.

I was back on the road again and heading north. There really isn’t much in Illinois in fact it is pretty much a clone of Iowa. There is simply nothing but corn.

After many miles in Illinois I finally reached a “toll road” which is the first time I’ve ever had to pay to drive on a road. I pulled up and paid $1.00 for the honor. I was a little annoyed with the fact that my motorcycle is the same cost as a car. I take up less room, I weigh less, etc.

I kept heading north and eventually reached Wisconsin. When I went inside the gas station I understood what the attendant was saying. I realized I was no longer in the south. I had somehow made it back to the Midwest.

It took most of the day to head northwest in Wisconsin. I was crossing the country on July 4th. I was coming to the realization that I can go anywhere I want whenever I want. I have the freedom to do anything. Not only do I have that freedom I had just used it.

Eventually I was seeing more Minnesota plates then anything else. I was almost home and this trip was almost done with. Really it was a depressing feeling it was time to face the real world once again.

I stopped for gas for the last time in Wisconsin. One hundred miles later I crossed the Mississippi river again into Minnesota. I had about 20 miles left to get home. For the first time on the entire trip I slowed down to the speed limit. I wasn’t really sure I wanted this to be over. I made it home safe.

Two thousand three hundred and five miles….

Was it worth it?

Without a doubt


Gas Purchases (processed so far):

TEXACO 00302491 TERRY MS
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

PILOT Hayti MO
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

PILOT Charleston MO
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

PILOT Hayti MO
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

PILOT W. Memphis AR
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

AMOCO OIL 02356301 MARION IL
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

EXXONMOBIL75 04530234 WINONA MS
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

CYCLE SERVICE PLUS PEARL MS
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

EXXONMOBIL75 04565420 BATESVIL MS
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

CHEVRON 00211806 CANTON MS
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

PILOT Winona MS
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

J & N TRUCK STOP ST GENVIEVE MO
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

WENTZVILLE 66 00461418 WENTZVILLE MO
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

EXXONMOBIL75 04772588 TURRELL AR
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

WENTZVILLE 66 00461418 WENTZVILLE MO
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

EXXONMOBIL75 04772588 TURRELL AR
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

EXXONMOBIL75 04565420 BATESVIL MS
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

HOLIDAY STATIONSTORE OSSEO MN
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

SHELL OIL 57441887601 ALBERT LEA MN
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

AMOCO OIL 04649984 TAYLOR MO
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

AMOCO OIL 05883079 AINSWORTH IA
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE

1-55 & US 62 E SIKESTON MO
CASH & CHECK CARD PURCHASE
 
In about 20 years you'll look back and say I can't believe I did that. Cool trip. Try it again when you can spedn sometime really visiting those areas. There is some great history along that route.
 
Great trip, Jesse! Kind of reminds me of my Wisconsin -> New Orleans -> Los Angeles -> Seattle -> Wisconsin trip in 1978 on a Honda CB750. Good times!!
 
jangell said:
Several fuel stops later I was in southern Iowa. I went into the gas station and it was at this point I realized how far I’m actually going. Already people had changed. By the way…There are more rednecks in southern Iowa then Mississippi.

Terry Branstad, 4 term governor of Iowa, once said that we could secede all of Iowa south of I80 (splits the state in half north/south) to Missouri and raise the average IQ of both states. I dont doubt it, I have some way out there relatives from down there, cousins of my grandma type of thing. Thankfully I only have to see them at funerals or family rebellions.

sounds like you had fun overall.
 
Great ride report Jesse!

Do you think you ate something that made you sick or was it just exhaustion and sitting on the bike for a billion miles when you're not use to those distances?

Really stupid songs :rofl: ...been there done that and there are no witnesses.

jangell said:
I was coming to the realization that I can go anywhere I want whenever I want.

That's what it's all about.


All I can say is:
 

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I can't belive you had teh language problem. Maybe you just haven't heard enough for long enough.

My problem when I worked in Nashville was I was on my hype caffeinated city slicker speed and they weren't. I felt like I was in the Star Trek original episode where Kirk is moving so fast they can't see him and they look like they're standing still or like that the fats talker of AMerica Bob and Ray routine.

The maintenance guy said, " Ya K n o w M-I-K-E Y O U D live a lot long er if youd just S-L-O-W-E-D d o w n...."

I think I can understand and speak the lingo.
 
You da man Jesse, you da man....!!!

I know you know this but the caffine and sugar got you. You would have done better to eat Cliff bars and water. Same thing happens to the newbies in my charter world. If we have a long night, meaning they were probably up all day and then got called out to fly all night. They are drinking coffee and eating candy bars. Usually they start to feel sick by morning. Plus, usually worried about making the next stop without peeing. :) On my long flights and bike rides, I usually pack Cliff bars and bananas. I found I can actually go a lot farther now without the caffine than I can with it.

Amazing story! I have never been that far. The longest I have gone in a day on a bike is 800 miles! You da man!
 
Good to hear you had a safe trip home. That was definitely more miles than my 10-speed ride to Atlanta from MS.

That toll road at Rockford, IL...must be a range war between IL and WI....lol

Next time we'll take an air tour when you have more time. And we'll take more time to learn the dialect. We like to talk slow because we like to take a long time talking to the women around here...:yes:

See you at OSH.
 
Jesse,

Awesome! Sounds like you went right past me on the trip home (I-55 to 39 to 90 to 94?) though I may have been over at RAC.

I must say, I'd rather not learn about the effects of fatigue on a bike. It was bad enough that I learned 'em in a truck!

It starts when you don't even feel tired - You just notice that you're not driving as well as you normally do, and you're not checking your mirrors at all. Then, you start to feel it. Yawning, nodding off, scratching your head a lot, etc. Next comes the hallucinations. I usually see things like stop signs right in the middle of the interstate and other such nonsense. Finally (and TG this has only happened to me once - never again!) your brain loses the ability to encode sensory inputs into short-term memory. If you're lucky, something will jar you just enough that you wake up, go OH $#!+!!! and stop when you realize you're nowhere near where you thought you were 5 seconds ago. (I made it from Rice Lake to Fond Du Lac, WI - about 2.5 hours - in what seemed to be a shake of the head). :hairraise: :hairraise: :hairraise: :hairraise: :hairraise:

Interstates can also get you into tunnel-vision mode. Miles upon miles of gentle (if any) curves and no stops. It can get monotonous. I like going on out-of-the way little highways when I have the time and they're relatively on-route.

Steve said:
That toll road at Rockford, IL...must be a range war between IL and WI....lol

Haha... No, it's just Illinois' last chance to remind you they suck before you get to Wisconsin and drive on our smooth, FREE roads. :D

Heard on a Milwaukee-area radio station shortly after IL raised their tolls a few years ago: "Uh, for all the FIBs out there... That's, uh, Friendly Illinois Brethren, uh huh... We have an improved toll system here in Wisconsin. Rather than stopping at a toll booth, we ask that you simply open up your window every 10 minutes or so and throw 75 cents into the median. We've got a guy named Willie who goes around and collects it at night." :rofl:
 
Very well written, Jesse. I know that I, for one, am super impressed. Sounds like a story you'll tell yer grandkids someday.
 
Nice writeup! I did a marathon trip only once on a bike, and nothing near as long as yours. I had a Kawasaki 350 triple that was a real quick bike, but I realized a hundred miles into the trip that it was not a good long distance bike. I crossed South Dakota from south west to north east to south east and back again, maybe 7 or 800 miles tops. I rode the last 200 miles sicker than a dog, sleeping in city parks, rest stops, etc as well. I got nailed in a huge thunderstorm about 30 minutes east of Wall, SD with ice cold rain and hail, and not an overpass, underpass or tree within 50 miles. I pulled up to a cousin's house near enough to hypothermia that I couldn't even talk or get my helmet off.

Ah, youth ... indestructable and invinceable.

BTW, I was born in Minnesota and speak fluent Minnesotan. However, I've seen the book "How to Speak Minnesotan" but haven't seen the same for the southern dialects! I spent a year in and around Memphis and didn't have a lot of trouble with the accents - rather liked the soft drawl from the sweet southern belles! :D
 
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Ken Ibold said:
Great trip, Jesse! Kind of reminds me of my Wisconsin -> New Orleans -> Los Angeles -> Seattle -> Wisconsin trip in 1978 on a Honda CB750. Good times!!
Now that..is a long ride.

flyingcheesehead said:
Awesome! Sounds like you went right past me on the trip home (I-55 to 39 to 90 to 94?) though I may have been over at RAC.
That was the route.

Steve said:
Good to hear you had a safe trip home. That was definitely more miles than my 10-speed ride to Atlanta from MS.
Well, I'm not sure. 10-speeds require a little more work than a motorcycle.

Steve said:
Next time we'll take an air tour when you have more time. And we'll take more time to learn the dialect. We like to talk slow because we like to take a long time talking to the women around here...:yes:
hahaha....Sounds good.
 
All I can say is 'Wow'. I cannot remember how I spent the summer of my 18th year, but it certainly did not include the same ambition and confidence. Though it means little, Jesse, you have my respect.


"I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. " H.D. Thoreau
 
gkainz said:
BTW, I was born in Minnesota and speak fluent Minnesotan. However, I've seen the book "How to Speak Minnesotan" but haven't seen the same for the southern dialects! I spent a year in and around Memphis and didn't have a lot of trouble with the accents - rather liked the soft drawl from the sweet southern belles! :D

Come on down, I speak all dialects, including Minnesotan and Canadian.
We'll give ya' a real teachin in the ways of orderin' food an' such.
Why, you'll even be able to go to the Waffle house and order hash browns with the most seasoned veteran.
"Scattered, gathered, covered, smothered, chuncked and peppered."
Mmmmmmm. Good

Call now!!!!! 1-800-RED-NECK Our folks is standin' by the phone ready to fix you right up!
 
First....glad you made it and you will definately have stories to tell.

Second...would you fly like that? Then why ride like that?

Even as a fellow rider, I never understood Iron Butt riders, nor the mentality that supports riders driving as fatigued as you were. I mean if cagers did this and posted it on a motorcycle board they would be roasted for creating a very serious hazard to the driving public.

The wife and I did a 3000 mile trip to Canada and back...but did it in 9 days. Made for fun, exciting, and safe riding.

Again...glad you made it, now NEVER do that again! LOL
 
A website for reference...:)

http://netsquirrel.com/crispen/word.html

gkainz said:
,,,, However, I've seen the book "How to Speak Minnesotan" but haven't seen the same for the southern dialects! I spent a year in and around Memphis and didn't have a lot of trouble with the accents - rather liked the soft drawl from the sweet southern belles! :D
 
Jesse


WOOO HOOO!!!!!!

Great ride, great story. Yuppers, caffine and sugar overload. It'll do it every time. I keep peanuts, raisins, peanut butter crackers in my tank bag. Along with some Ice Breaker breath mints. gatorade, Cliff Builder bars and some Power bars are in the trunk bag. A handful of peanuts and rasins every 50 or so miles does much more than a candy bar or two.

I'm trying to figgure out a way/device that I can mount on the bars and have a snack at hand instead of stopping, unzipping the bags, etc. Will have the Camelbak full of gatorade.

We're heading to MN (Faribault) next month. Not sure if we are going to IB any portion of the ride, I'm thinking we may head over on Hwy 2. The scenic route.

I keep coffee to a bare minimum when I'm on a long trip. An occasional Starbucks Frappachino is OK, but I prefer the little Jet Alert caplets. Faster reaction than drinking a pop/coffee and it doesn't kill my stomach and make me nauseous.

Time to start planning another ride..... Just make sure you SLEEP before you head out. :p
 
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