Technical analysis of Santa Claus

Dave Siciliano

Final Approach
Joined
Feb 27, 2005
Messages
6,434
Location
Dallas, Texas
Display Name

Display name:
Dave Siciliano
Each year, the folks on AvSig discuss how Santa does it. Jim Good kicked it off this year. Knowing we have some excellent technical folks on here, I though we should open this up for folks like Lance and our other technical gurus!!

Best,

Dave

1) No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.

2) There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.

3) Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second.
This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh an move on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purpose of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75« million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding, etc.

This means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 time the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second - a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.

4) The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, the conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting the "flying reindeer"
(see point #1) could pull TEN TIMES the normal amount, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases the payload -not even counting the weight of the sleigh - to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison - this is four times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth.

5) 353,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance - this will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each. In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake.
The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to centrifugal forces
17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force reducing him to a pink slime about .003 of an inch thick. In conclusion - If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve, he's dead now.

Merry Christmas!
 
Gee, thanks, Dave, for busting that balloon. What do I tell my 5-year-old grandson (who of course is the smartest child on the planet)?

What are ya gonna tell us next, that 50 ROP isn't the best way to run a big-bore TCM engine ?! ;)

-- Pilawt
 
Gee, thanks, Dave, for busting that balloon. What do I tell my 5-year-old grandson (who of course is the smartest child on the planet)?

What are ya gonna tell us next, that 50 ROP isn't the best way to run a big-bore TCM engine ?! ;)

-- Pilawt

Whatdid Ido? I thought I was showing it could be possible :yes:

Best,

Dave
 
Wow, if Santa can do all that in one night, then we ought to be able to get the 4726 airports for the ConUs Challenge in a year and a quarter!

I know for a fact that there is a Santa Claus. My dad used to work in the Command Post at the SAC bases he was stationed at. It seemed like he worked every Christmas Eve. My brothers and I would take cookies to him and the other guys. It was pretty cool going into his work. It took all three of us to deliver the cookies. One to hold the cookies, one to push the doorbell and jump up and down so they could see us through the security window(we weren't real tall back then) and one to open the door when they pushed the buzzer to let us in. The light was dim inside and there was all kinds of instruments and one of those great big see-thru maps with airplanes marked on it. Then the teletype machine started typing and anounced that Santa Claus was spotted heading south and was being passed off from airbase to airbase. You see, my dad had to work so Santa could make his rounds safely. The Air Force doesn't screw around, so I know there has to be a Santa.:yes: :yes: :D

If Santa could go faster than the speed of light, he could get back before he started. :dunno:

Barb
 
Wow, if Santa can do all that in one night, then we ought to be able to get the 4726 airports for the ConUs Challenge in a year and a quarter!

I know for a fact that there is a Santa Claus. My dad used to work in the Command Post at the SAC bases he was stationed at. It seemed like he worked every Christmas Eve. My brothers and I would take cookies to him and the other guys. It was pretty cool going into his work. It took all three of us to deliver the cookies. One to hold the cookies, one to push the doorbell and jump up and down so they could see us through the security window(we weren't real tall back then) and one to open the door when they pushed the buzzer to let us in. The light was dim inside and there was all kinds of instruments and one of those great big see-thru maps with airplanes marked on it. Then the teletype machine started typing and anounced that Santa Claus was spotted heading south and was being passed off from airbase to airbase. You see, my dad had to work so Santa could make his rounds safely. The Air Force doesn't screw around, so I know there has to be a Santa.:yes: :yes: :D

If Santa could go faster than the speed of light, he could get back before he started. :dunno:

Barb

There you go Barb!! And there are some technically plausible explanations, tooooo! If he's fast enough to approach or exceed the speed of light, time slows down. And, much as we hate to admit it, he must have some helpers!

Best,

Dave
 
1) No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.

On 24 December 1967 I was outside playing in the the snow that was falling after dinner. My father was there and I saw a red light in the distance. My father wanted me to come in and go to sleep. I asked him was the red light Rudolph? He told me yes it was and that he was pulling Santa's sleigh, so I have seen those reindeer. That is, unless you are calling my dad a liar??!!
 
ha i had a similar experience when i was young too scott! as i got older, i realized it was just a cell phone tower, but boy was that cool! i was positive i had seen rudolph flying into town and by golly when we got home Santa had been there!
 
ha i had a similar experience when i was young too scott! as i got older, i realized it was just a cell phone tower, but boy was that cool! i was positive i had seen rudolph flying into town and by golly when we got home Santa had been there!

It was 1967, there were no cell phone towers.

HAH! I saw the real Rudolph!!
 
For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second

Ulysses actually had an escape velocity of 34,450 mph, which equates to approximately 9.57 miles per second. New Horizons had an escape velocity of 35,800 mph, which gives it the fastest launched vehicle record at 9.94 miles per second. But if you really want fast, look at the Helios spacecraft which attained a velocity of 153,800 mph, or 42.72 miles per second :) (This was due to the highly elliptical orbit that was used to get the spacecraft close to the Sun, so that as it came closer to the Sun, gravity propelled it to a maximum velocity of 153,800 mph)
 
There you go Barb!! And there are some technically plausible explanations, tooooo! If he's fast enough to approach or exceed the speed of light, time slows down. And, much as we hate to admit it, he must have some helpers!

Best,

Dave

There are many Santas each with a team of reindeer. How many is unknown. They each take a section of area and deliver presents to the good kids. This way the deliveries can be made all in one night. After all, how could 1 Santa be at all of the malls at one time for kids to sit on his lap?
 
Stephen Hawking said:
According to string theory, which is our best hope of uniting General Relativity and Quantum Theory, into a Theory of Everything, space-time ought to have ten dimensions, not just the four that we experience. The idea is that six of these ten dimensions are curled up into a space so small, that we don't notice them. On the other hand, the remaining four directions are fairly flat, and are what we call space-time. If this picture is correct, it might be possible to arrange that the four flat directions got mixed up with the six highly curved or warped directions. What this would give rise to, we don't yet know. But it opens exciting possibilities.
As I interpret Mr. Hawking, there are enough dimensions to allow Santa to do whatever is needed in the space-time available.

Especially, considering that Santa is a jolly old ELF, whose weight and other dimensions are much more diminutive than Dave suggests.

No, it is, as trailershowroom has succinctly summed up, MAGIC.

There was a young lady of Wight,
Who traveled much faster than light,
She departed one day,
In a relative way,
And arrived on the previous night.

Uncertainty Principle
The more precisely the position of something is defined,
the less precisely its speed can be defined, and vice versa.
 
As I interpret Mr. Hawking, there are enough dimensions to allow Santa to do whatever is needed in the space-time available.

Especially, considering that Santa is a jolly old ELF, whose weight and other dimensions are much more diminutive than Dave suggests.

No, it is, as trailershowroom has succinctly summed up, MAGIC.

There was a young lady of Wight,
Who traveled much faster than light,
She departed one day,
In a relative way,
And arrived on the previous night.

Uncertainty Principle
The more precisely the position of something is defined,
the less precisely its speed can be defined, and vice versa.

Now, this is more like it!!! My intent was not to show Santa couldn't do it; it was to show all the obstacles he successfully overcomes every year!!

Best,

Dave
 
Uncertainty Principle
The more precisely the position of something is defined,
the less precisely its speed can be defined, and vice versa.

I gotta hijack for a second to point out that this theory here is why I honestly believe we are going down the wrong path in physics (Well, this and the magic that is friction).

What this principle states is "You'll never know why stuff happens, so don't try, just trust us, k?"

I don't know what the real answer to the question of "how" is, but I am about 90% positive we have it wrong with friction based physics and the uncertainty principle.
 
Back
Top