Lets make Friday 'Joke Day'!

Discussion in 'Hangar Talk' started by Let'sgoflying!, Feb 9, 2007.

  1. denverpilot

    denverpilot Tied Down PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2009
    Messages:
    55,441
    Location:
    Denver, CO

    Display name:
    DenverPilot
    Actually now hanging in my guest bathroom. [​IMG]
     
    Palmpilot, Zeldman, WannFly and 2 others like this.
  2. denverpilot

    denverpilot Tied Down PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2009
    Messages:
    55,441
    Location:
    Denver, CO

    Display name:
    DenverPilot
  3. denverpilot

    denverpilot Tied Down PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2009
    Messages:
    55,441
    Location:
    Denver, CO

    Display name:
    DenverPilot
    Two longs, a short, and a long...[​IMG]
     
    A Martin, Charlie Golf and Hawker800 like this.
  4. denverpilot

    denverpilot Tied Down PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2009
    Messages:
    55,441
    Location:
    Denver, CO

    Display name:
    DenverPilot
    Pretty much...[​IMG]
     
    Piperonca likes this.
  5. denverpilot

    denverpilot Tied Down PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2009
    Messages:
    55,441
    Location:
    Denver, CO

    Display name:
    DenverPilot
    Free labor...[​IMG]
     
    Morgan3820, Bill, WannFly and 6 others like this.
  6. A Martin

    A Martin Pre-takeoff checklist

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2020
    Messages:
    340

    Display name:
    A Martin
    .

    A farmer had property next to a home for the mentally infirm.

    One day as he was hauling a load of manure by the place, there was an inmate standing inside the fence watching him. He called out to the farmer and said, "Hey, Mr. Farmer, what are you doing?"

    The farmer told him, "I'm taking this manure to put on my strawberries."

    The inmate replied, "You ought to come in here! We get cream and sugar on ours!"


    .
     
    Palmpilot and Lycosaurus like this.
  7. A1Topgun

    A1Topgun Cleared for Takeoff PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2015
    Messages:
    1,221
    Location:
    Central Maine

    Display name:
    Ron
  8. A1Topgun

    A1Topgun Cleared for Takeoff PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2015
    Messages:
    1,221
    Location:
    Central Maine

    Display name:
    Ron
  9. wayne

    wayne Pattern Altitude

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2007
    Messages:
    2,128
    Location:
    Atlanta, GA

    Display name:
    wayne
    From my 11 year old niece. (Best spoken)

    "Is buttcheeks one word, or do you have to spread 'em apart? “
     
    A Martin, Lycosaurus, Jim K and 2 others like this.
  10. Charlie Golf

    Charlie Golf Line Up and Wait

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2020
    Messages:
    644
    Location:
    Western MA

    Display name:
    CGB
  11. Charlie Golf

    Charlie Golf Line Up and Wait

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2020
    Messages:
    644
    Location:
    Western MA

    Display name:
    CGB
  12. A1Topgun

    A1Topgun Cleared for Takeoff PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2015
    Messages:
    1,221
    Location:
    Central Maine

    Display name:
    Ron
  13. A1Topgun

    A1Topgun Cleared for Takeoff PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2015
    Messages:
    1,221
    Location:
    Central Maine

    Display name:
    Ron
  14. Hawker800

    Hawker800 Cleared for Takeoff

    Joined:
    Oct 5, 2013
    Messages:
    1,122

    Display name:
    Daniel
  15. denverpilot

    denverpilot Tied Down PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2009
    Messages:
    55,441
    Location:
    Denver, CO

    Display name:
    DenverPilot
    Here fishy fishy fishy...[​IMG]
     
    NoHeat, SoonerAviator and A1Topgun like this.
  16. denverpilot

    denverpilot Tied Down PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Nov 8, 2009
    Messages:
    55,441
    Location:
    Denver, CO

    Display name:
    DenverPilot
    Work/life balance...[​IMG]
     
    eman1200 and A1Topgun like this.
  17. A1Topgun

    A1Topgun Cleared for Takeoff PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2015
    Messages:
    1,221
    Location:
    Central Maine

    Display name:
    Ron
  18. Hawker800

    Hawker800 Cleared for Takeoff

    Joined:
    Oct 5, 2013
    Messages:
    1,122

    Display name:
    Daniel
  19. A Martin

    A Martin Pre-takeoff checklist

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2020
    Messages:
    340

    Display name:
    A Martin
    A paranormal research professor asked the audience how many believed in ghosts .... about 90 hands went up.

    Then he asked how many had ever seen a ghost .... 15 hands went up

    How many have ever actually touched a ghost .... 3 hands went up.

    Final question ... have you ever made love to a ghost .... to his surprise one hand in the back of the room went up.

    He invited the man to come forward , introduce himself , and tell everybody about this very rare experience.

    The man said ... my name is Achmed and where I come from we make love to goats all the time.

    .
     
    A1Topgun likes this.
  20. A Martin

    A Martin Pre-takeoff checklist

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2020
    Messages:
    340

    Display name:
    A Martin
    .

    A blonde and a redhead were talking when the redhead mentioned that she recently had sex with a Brazilian.

    The blonde says .... you are a very immoral woman .... just how many is that anyway . ??

    .
     
    Torque beast and A1Topgun like this.
  21. A Martin

    A Martin Pre-takeoff checklist

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2020
    Messages:
    340

    Display name:
    A Martin
    .

    An offhore oil well had a broken pipe and was spewing oil all over the place.

    Even the best engineers could not stop it so they appealed to the public for help.

    Next day a marriage councilor approached the crew with a very large wedding band and told them to slip it over the pipe.

    Immediately the well stopped putting out.

    .
     
  22. A Martin

    A Martin Pre-takeoff checklist

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2020
    Messages:
    340

    Display name:
    A Martin
    .

    Son of an Arab Sheikh comes to America and enrolls in college.

    After the first week he sends an e-mail home saying: ..... Dear Dad .... America is wonderful, people are nice and I really like it here .... but I am bit embarrassed to arrive at my college in my Gold Mercedes because all my teachers travel by train.

    Father replied back .... please stop embarrassing our family .... tomorrow I will have twenty Million Dollars transferred to your account so that you can go and get yourself a train too.

    .
     
  23. Rokke214

    Rokke214 Pre-Flight

    Joined:
    May 20, 2021
    Messages:
    59
    Location:
    Colorado

    Display name:
    Rokke214
  24. luvflyin

    luvflyin Touchdown! Greaser! PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    May 8, 2015
    Messages:
    11,139
    Location:
    Vancouver, WA

    Display name:
    Luvflyin
    You all remember Sum Ting Wong, Wi To Lo, Ho Lee Fuk and Bang Ding Ow. These people signed up to speak at the at the School Board meeting. Only one person showed up. She wasn't one of these.
    Phil McCracken
    Eileen Dover
    Wayne Kuhr
    Suk Mahdik
    Ophelia McCaulk
    Don Kedik
     
  25. Hawker800

    Hawker800 Cleared for Takeoff

    Joined:
    Oct 5, 2013
    Messages:
    1,122

    Display name:
    Daniel
  26. SoonerAviator

    SoonerAviator Final Approach

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2014
    Messages:
    6,871
    Location:
    Broken Arrow, OK

    Display name:
    SoonerAviator
    Lol, that's awesome. Guy was clueless. I used to work in accounting for a very large background investigations company, and periodically the IT group would have to try and fix a connection issue with some of the court docket systems. When they'd test, typically they'd just use some fake names to see if it spit out the info on the other end. I would be looking through invoice/docket records and you'd see "Seymore Butts" and similar, which sometimes had us rolling if they had some original ones we hadn't seen.
     
    denverpilot and Rokke214 like this.
  27. EdFred

    EdFred Taxi to Parking

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2005
    Messages:
    27,581
    Location:
    Michigan

    Display name:
    Ed Frederick
    For about a year I worked in a cubicle farm. It wasn't sprawling, maybe 15-20 people. All the guys in the office were pretty big sports fans and break time was always discussing whatever the sport of the season was. Was probably the most fun group I ever worked with. Stayed on good terms when I left, so when I was out I'd stop in and say hi, or give them a call once in a while. When you would call in, the receptionist, she wouldn't just transfer the call, but always tell the person who was getting the call who was calling. And of course that was on speakerphone so the whole farm could hear who was calling. I never gave my real name when I would call in but always use the name of some football/basketball coach. That always got a laugh out of everyone else who wasn't getting the call.
     
    Last edited: Aug 31, 2021
    A Martin likes this.
  28. luvflyin

    luvflyin Touchdown! Greaser! PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    May 8, 2015
    Messages:
    11,139
    Location:
    Vancouver, WA

    Display name:
    Luvflyin
    Dick Butt Kiss???:rofl:
     
  29. SoonerAviator

    SoonerAviator Final Approach

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2014
    Messages:
    6,871
    Location:
    Broken Arrow, OK

    Display name:
    SoonerAviator
    Yeah, the background investigations company was a real-life version of Office Space. Grey cubicles about 4' tall, with our collections/payables department one row over filled with a bunch of misfits who always had some debacle to ramble about, plus the malfunctioning copier/fax was nearby and the corporate "town hall" meetings just topped it off. My accounting group was cool, and since my mother had worked at this company for 2 decades I had known many of my co-workers for over a decade prior to starting work there. One of the few prior workplaces where I still keep up with my workmates, even though I was only there a few years before I couldn't take it anymore.
     
  30. Plano Pilot

    Plano Pilot Line Up and Wait

    Joined:
    Oct 24, 2016
    Messages:
    533
    Location:
    KADS

    Display name:
    Plano Pilot
  31. AggieMike88

    AggieMike88 Touchdown! Greaser!

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2010
    Messages:
    19,654
    Location:
    Denton, TX

    Display name:
    The original "I don't know it all" of aviation.
    JOhnH likes this.
  32. JOhnH

    JOhnH Touchdown! Greaser!

    Joined:
    May 20, 2009
    Messages:
    12,938
    Location:
    Florida

    Display name:
    Right Seater
    That was great. How do people find stuff like this?
     
  33. Matthew

    Matthew Touchdown! Greaser!

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2005
    Messages:
    17,364
    Location:
    kojc, kixd, k34

    Display name:
    Matthew
    That’s the Bob and Tom show. I listen to them most mornings.
     
  34. AggieMike88

    AggieMike88 Touchdown! Greaser!

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2010
    Messages:
    19,654
    Location:
    Denton, TX

    Display name:
    The original "I don't know it all" of aviation.
    I grew up on comedy LP’s, Spike Jones and his City Slickers, and Dr. Demento. Novelty songs are my jam. Wore out a needle listening to Stan Freberg and Tom Lehrer.

    Other fun ones of Heywood Banks





     
    Last edited: Aug 31, 2021
  35. AggieMike88

    AggieMike88 Touchdown! Greaser!

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2010
    Messages:
    19,654
    Location:
    Denton, TX

    Display name:
    The original "I don't know it all" of aviation.
    And for the guys all out of hope and at the end of their rope, there is this song from DaVinci’s Notebook
     
  36. MauleSkinner

    MauleSkinner Touchdown! Greaser!

    Joined:
    Oct 25, 2005
    Messages:
    10,012
    Location:
    Wichita, KS

    Display name:
    MauleSkinner
    Based on context, shouldn’t that be “offwhore”?
     
    A Martin likes this.
  37. Rokke214

    Rokke214 Pre-Flight

    Joined:
    May 20, 2021
    Messages:
    59
    Location:
    Colorado

    Display name:
    Rokke214
  38. A1Topgun

    A1Topgun Cleared for Takeoff PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2015
    Messages:
    1,221
    Location:
    Central Maine

    Display name:
    Ron
    A whole new meaning!


    13-gun-free-zone.jpg
     
  39. A1Topgun

    A1Topgun Cleared for Takeoff PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Sep 6, 2015
    Messages:
    1,221
    Location:
    Central Maine

    Display name:
    Ron
  40. Albany Tom

    Albany Tom Line Up and Wait PoA Supporter

    Joined:
    Jul 23, 2021
    Messages:
    540

    Display name:
    Albany Tom
    Have to bring it around to something a little lighter...

    What's the difference between a crack dealer, a lobbyist, and a chain auto repair shop?

    Some crack dealers have some sort of sense of ethical behavior.