And on top of it all I have to root for Duke?!?!

EdFred

EdFred

Taxi to Parking
Joined
Feb 25, 2005
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White Chocolate
The ***damn mother****ing, piece of **** Blue Devils? Really? The team I've hated from the utter depths of my existence since the early 90's? Now I have to cheer for these guys? ****! And it has nothing to do with March Madness.

You probably noticed (or celebrated) the past few months, I haven't been as active as I have in the past. Right now I feel like Vincent Gambini.

Starting last fall, I found a couple of growths on Kaiser, and two more discovered by the vet when we went in for his array of vaccines. Turns out two of them were cancerous, two of them were benign. So, I end up dropping a pretty penny on that. He's doing OK, but the vet said keep watch, because once boxers (even mixes like him) start getting growths, they tend to keep getting them.

This was going on right around the time I met someone, and things started to look up. Until without warning, and with no explanation, she just stops talking. Nothing leading up to it, just a wall thrown up. No return calls, text, or email. Just left me wondering what the hell was going on. Wouldn't have been a big deal, but happening at the same time as what was going on with Kaiser, I just didn't deal with it well.

I stumble through the end of the year, and try to take things a new direction. With not a lot of luck, but I'm going to give it a go. Then I get a buyer for my plane. Hey, things are looking better, I'm going to take that money and buy some property and really start prepping for the long term. Then this happens. So the deal falls through, and now I look like a piece of **** owner trying pass off a bum aircraft on someone. Well, I am ****ed. Not so much that the sale fell through - though disappointed. But that I come out looking like a bad guy, when I had no idea that all the cylinders are now ****.

And if that wasn't enough, we have the thread title. Now what the hell does that have to do with what's going on?

Last month, I bailed on the Texas/Six Flags fly in that I set up. Well, it actually had nothing to do with me selling the plane. Turns out, I'm a dad. Not, I'm going to be a dad, I am a dad. Well, I don't know if I can qualify as being a dad, but I have a kid, and I just met him last month. He turned 17 in January, graduates in the spring, and is off to Duke to play soccer (luckily on scholarship) in the fall. I never knew about him. When my girlfriend from '97 cheated on with, and ditched me for, one of her co-workers, I never heard from her again. I don't know if she tried to look me up or not (she is/was from the Detroit area), but he did. I'm still attempting to figure it all out because I always wanted kids, but saw myself changing diapers, sending them off to school, playing ball, etc...and I've missed out on that. So now I have to root for the the ****** Blue Devils. Penance, I guess.

I guess with the sale of the plane falling through, I will get to put it to use going to North Carolina to watch soccer games in the fall.
 
Wow. I am really sorry to hear all of that. Anything I say will certainly be short of the mark. But I hope that you can develop a good relationship with your son that, if nothing else, enhances your current and future life, and his as well.

My mother and father were separated before I was born, and divorced shortly thereafter. I remember meeting him as very small child, and it was weird. No one really explained to me who he was when he first came to see me. I just sort of figured it out as I got older. I spent some time with him as a kid, but we never really clicked, and I never really enjoyed my time with him. There were long stretches where I had no contact, and he was always delinquent with child support.

Now that I am an adult, I have zero familial relationship with him. I am not angry at him, or disappointed. I honestly don't wish he would have been around more when I was a kid. He's just a guy I know. (Which frankly, is probably the worst thing a father would want to hear.)

It's weird now that I have my own son. I struggle with what is the correct thing to do for my son. I don't really trust the guy with my son, but I don't want my baggage to get in the way of him having a relationship with his only living biological grandfather.

Of course, this guy knew about me, and didn't really make the effort-- not that I really wanted him to. So you have a big leg up on my father in terms of trying to establish a relationship given that you didn't have a clue, and would surely have been there had you known. My father has put himself in a no-win situation. I don't like it all when he tries to reach out as a parent to me or to my son. It feels weird and creepy. I really hate getting birthday cards or presents from him. But on the other hand, if he doesn't, he's a bastard dead-beat dad/grandfather that can't be bothered.

I don't know why I posted all of this. None of this applies to you, except maybe how your son might feel about a stranger trying to establish a family bond. My advice is just to lay it out there for him, acknowledge that you know this might feel weird to him, and you will respect whatever boundaries he needs, but that you as a father have both a moral obligation, as well as a burning desire to do what you can to make sure he knows you do not reject him and to try to develop as strong as a relationship as he will allow.
 
Jeez Ed! I thought my life was a cluster!!! :D May be take up drinking, or something? Just kidding! You know my number if you need to chat.
 
Sorry to hear about your dog Ed.
 
Not that I'm callous, but I see the posting date. Hmmmm.

And my wife has still never forgiven him for that crashed Pitts comment at Gastons!
 
You'd look cool rooting for Duke.
 
I thought you were buying a Duke so you could finally look good.
 
Ken Ibold said:
Not that I'm callous, but I see the posting date. Hmmmm.

And my wife has still never forgiven him for that crashed Pitts comment at Gastons!
Click to expand...

Hey, if she wasn't calling to ruin your weekend, she would have never heard the comment. The lesson here is, never call and ruin a spouses weekend. ;)

And yes, it was posted on 4/1. All except the kid part is true. I emailed this out and got a few people with it. The funny thing is the people I told about the sale falling through thought it was a 4/1 joke, because I got the plane home on the 31st, and told them the next day.
 
How's my fourth favorite dog doing anyway?

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