Best way to un butter your windows?

SixPapaCharlie

May the force be with you
Joined
Aug 8, 2013
Messages
16,004
Display Name

Display name:
Sixer
Hypothetically, you're flying along in your plane.
It can be any plane at all.
Any plane with a sliding canopy that opens.

Its 106 degrees out and you land at an FBO and see popcorn in the vending machine and so you buy a bag, pop it, and hop back in your plane with the sliding canopy and low wing.

Its very hot in the plane and you realize maybe popcorn is not the best hot day snack in your sliding canopy, low wing, blue and white plane.

You have the thought that popcorn is totally biodegradable and more importantly the thought of folks randomly noticing popcorn falling from the sky is pretty funny, and
could to some potential religious implications. You may even start a cult.

So after thinking over the situation for a bit, you find yourself over Okmulgee Oklahoma.

Its time.

You decide to throw caution to the wind and also your popcorn.
Right away you realize the wind is so strong that it is almost impossible to get any popcorn out of the bag because the mouth of the bag is forced closed.

You are not a quitter and you have goals so you reach out with your other hand and rip the bag freeing all of the popcorn in a blast of great smelling goodness at 5500 feet MSL.

As you continue the flight, you (while looking for traffic of course) think of all the scenarios that could unfold on the ground. These thoughts bring you a lot of joy.

Birds might catch it in flight. Perhaps it would land in the grass and germinate forming the future cornfields of Okmulgee. Maybe another plane would fly into the popcorn storm
and post on a forum about flying into a cloud of his favorite snack. So many possible outcomes.

You continue back to your homedrome and grease the 34rd best landing of your flying tenure and head to the hanger.

All is well but as you are putting the plane away, you notice that the plane smells really really good. Not coffee under the cowl good but really good.

You go to put the canopy cover on and see a 3 foot by 8 inch smear of popcorn butter along the back left window.

Of course you lick it just to make sure its not butter scented oil that leaked out in flight or some other random smear left over from a different non popcorn related butter encounter.

Yup, its buttery and salty and the plane has never tasted better.

Hypothetically in this situation, do you try to reclaim the butter for later use or is it better to get ye ole fiber of micro cloth and wipe it into oblivion?

You'd lick the cloth after of course but how to proceed first...

Also if ever you were standing in a random field.... or even a specific one for that matter, and found yourself under a small popcorn shower I wonder what all one might consider as to the cause.

Y'all can come lick my plane while I decide what to do next.
 
Precisely why do not eat in the plane. Well, my own plane. I'm more than happy to endousiate a Cathay Pacific 777 interior in spilled wine, tossed butter, ground in popcorn, au jus, fish oil, chunks of fat, marinara sauce, urine, sweat, vomit, blood, feces, and semen. But my own plane? Hell no. No siree Bob.
 
At least we’re not talking about “buttering” the INSIDE of the window if i know what I’m saying.....
 
Wait! Before we go on. I must show you this. Lickable wallpaper for flight school walls. Go ahead, try it!

The Grummans taste like Grummans, the Bonanzas taste like Bonanzas, the shnoz-cessnas taste like shnoz-cessnas!

Now if I just had a photo of Bryan with the proper facial angle to overlay over Gene's face....

upload_2018-9-17_15-41-22.png
 
This scenario is not solvable..... nobody would ever pay for popcorn in an FBO. Never.

I think you should submit a NASA report for paying for popcorn then notify AOPA and put them on the bad list.
 
I'm sure you took appropriate precautions to avoid damage or injury to anything or anyone on the ground, right? I mean, there are regulations to be complied with.
 
At least it's not as embarrassing as a trail of yellow liquid (or ice) along the aft sections.
 
Long-story, short: Bryan's a window licker. No news here. Carry on!

Side note: KOKM was the site of my first solo. It was much easier to fly out of RVS and do laps around the pattern at OKM where there was hardly any traffic and no tower to contend with.
 
and more importantly the thought of folks randomly noticing popcorn falling from the sky is pretty funny, and
could to some potential religious implications. You may even start a cult.

t.

Kernels. Yeah kernels. Popcorn kernels. Not military Colonels! What about dem unpopped kernels. You know, the ones that don't do what their supposed to do, the rebellious ones who refuse to pop. What would be the velocity of the unpopped kernels be is what I'm talking 'bout! So, some innocent earthing looks up and wonders at your popped popcorn floating down to earth, and WHAM, an unpopped kernel takes out the person's eye. Welllll I think the investigators know where to look for the guilty party!
 
Last edited:
Can we at least have a moment of silence for all the unborn kernals that went screaming to their deaths here?

Once again Bryan has chosen humor over humanity....
 
The Gods Must Be Peckish
 
I can't wait for your next post... the "pancakes and maple syrup" episode... :D
 
Call Paula.
We were watching her make some butter-grease ball thing that she was then deep frying.

"And you know what is great on this," she says showing the final product.... "MAYONAISE!"

My arteries were hardening just watching.
 
Also if ever you were standing in a random field.... or even a specific one for that matter, and found yourself under a small popcorn shower I wonder what all one might consider as to the cause.
Lasers and jiffy pop are the only things that come to mind.
 
Lasers and jiffy pop are the only things that come to mind.


Oh Hell Yeah!!!

giphy.gif
 
Um, next time you need to dump the popcorn over Lindsay, so I can make a film about popcorn falling from the sky.
 
Um, next time you need to dump the popcorn over Lindsay, so I can make a film about popcorn falling from the sky.

This must happen!
I'm gonna need a trash bag full of popcorn to make it work I bet.
 
Cows in the fields will mistake falling popcorn for snow and will freeze to death.

According to Paul Bunyan, anyway.
 
I take it ....your Windows OS is lacking.....the required cleaning app.o_O
 
I’ll make one actual serious suggestion... no you know what I’ll make two.

Dish soap or denatured alcohol.
 
I would suggest toast, made from the bread of your choice obviously.

Sent from my SM-G950U using Tapatalk
 
Back
Top