Making the traffic pattern safer (a satire)

SixPapaCharlie

May the force be with you
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Aug 8, 2013
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Its short and cobbled together but I threw it together quickly whilst working in the hangar in the heat and getting stung by wasps and s**t.

Enjoy. Or don't. I don't care. (the next two, I will care. This one... meh...)

 
Got stung by a wasp for the first time last year. That sucker hurt. I put a penny on it to ease the pain...it didn't work.
 
...and where can I get one of those FAA approved X's??

You have to buy them from me.
But there is a background check and a 7 day waiting period.

Is your medical current?
 
I stupidly purchased one of those from one of your competitors and when it arrived, it was a "+" not an "X".

I'll make sure to buy from you next time.

HAHAHAH!!!
I'm mad you thought of that and I didn't!

That's funny.
 
Where's the link to buy these? Do you have a illuminated option for use during an eclipse? Is there a warranty? What kind of legal monitoring/protection plan is available to ensure no one places their X on top of my X?
 
Why does @SixPapaCharlie have to label satires that are not satires? It looked perfectly reasonable to me.

feel bad about that too. I have a totally legit item to get to the pilots for their safety but I have to label it "Satire" for searchability.
The good news is I found a great URL where I can pedal my up and coming products.

Can't believe it wasn't taken...

http://worldsgreatestpilot.com/
 
What do you do if you want to land at a different airport than the one you took off from?
 
You have to buy them from me.
But there is a background check and a 7 day waiting period.

Is your medical current?
If medical not current, you still have some of those pass your medical kits for sale, right?
 
The good news is I found a great URL where I can pedal my up and coming products.

There is a new word for that: trending. No, no one knows what the phrase or the word really means.
 
It is not Fool Proof, Bry... And since it is Fools you are trying to avoid...Your Proprietary Product ain't worth diddly!

https://www.avweb.com/avwebflash/ne...ed_runway_texas_faa_investigate_203537-1.html

Excerpt: "The FAA has confirmed it is investigating the Oct 21 incident in which (Senator) Inhofe landed a Cessna 340 on an occupied closed runway at Port Isabel-Cameron County Airport, Texas, He was reportedly carrying three others in the light twin when he made the landing on a runway bearing oversized painted Xs,"
 
It is not Fool Proof, Bry... And since it is Fools you are trying to avoid...Your Proprietary Product ain't worth diddly!

This type of negativity is inappropriate behavior for America's aviation front porch. Please keep in mind at all times that sensitive, creative individuals such as Briany require support and encouragement rather than these uncalled for negative claims based on isolated incidents instigated by congresscritters. It is widely known and accepted that congresscritters lack any practical sense much less ability to follow rules and regulations.
 
What do you do if you want to land at a different airport than the one you took off from?
One would hope there would be a service like "Uber X" to take an X to the airport of intended landing while you are en route.
 
This type of negativity is inappropriate behavior for America's aviation front porch. Please keep in mind at all times that sensitive, creative individuals such as Briany require support and encouragement rather than these uncalled for negative claims based on isolated incidents instigated by congresscritters. It is widely known and accepted that congresscritters lack any practical sense much less ability to follow rules and regulations.

I'm sorry... I forgot...:rolleyes:... Sorry Bryan... hope I didn't scar you're deep artistic Soul...:p
 
One would hope there would be a service like "Uber X" to take an X to the airport of intended landing while you are en route.

^^^ that was some funny **** right there! Like Uber-funny.
 
This type of negativity is inappropriate behavior for America's aviation front porch. Please keep in mind at all times that sensitive, creative individuals such as Briany require support and encouragement rather than these uncalled for negative claims based on isolated incidents instigated by congresscritters. It is widely known and accepted that congresscritters lack any practical sense much less ability to follow rules and regulations.

It hurts my feelings when you call me sensitive.
 
I think your marketing is off.

You can't just spew out high tech specifications and expect the layman to understand why its technically superior. You must make them feel good, like they are getting a deal. Set the price to 2,200. Round numbers hit hard. Ok, how for a limited time, you can get yours for only $999.73 Odd funky numbers give that warm and fuzzy feeling.
 
I didn't CALL you a @#$%^, I only said you sounded like one.

[Says the guy who doesn't like name calling]
 
Our airport manager wants to know if he can order an "SE" along with the "X." He says fuel sales are OK, but condom sales are lagging.
 
I am simply stunned that @jesse does not own that domain!

Good grab, Bryan.

feel bad about that too. I have a totally legit item to get to the pilots for their safety but I have to label it "Satire" for searchability.
The good news is I found a great URL where I can pedal my up and coming products.

Can't believe it wasn't taken...

http://worldsgreatestpilot.com/
 
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